Secret Smiles and Three Little Words

Chapter 16

Alex dropped her purse off on the table as she sorted through her mail. Nothing, as usual.

"Hey stranger!" Lena called out.

"Hey!"

Alex turned the corner and Lena was on a chair changing the light bulb in the overhead light.

"Don't fall," Alex marveled.

"What's with that look?" her roommate asked seeing the grin on her roommates face.

"Well," Alex smiled crossing her arms. "I thought you were afraid of heights or something, because you would never change that lightbulb before! It could be out for days and you would still leave it for me!"

"Well," Lena shrugged. "I guess it's because my roomie isn't around much anymore!"

Alex frowned. She hadn't thought about how this new relationship was going to affect Lena.

"Don't," Lena warned her seeing her disappointment. "I was teasing! I am super happy you finally have a guy!"

"Finally?" Alex asked with a tapping of her foot in mock anger.

"Honey," Lena said getting off the chair. "It had been so long I thought poor Gavin was going to have to dust it off!"

"Hey!" Alex defended with a smile. Lena shrugged.

"So?"

"It was fantastic," Alex smiled.

"Come over here and fill me in!" Lena smiled taking her by the arm and leading her to the couch.

"There is nothing to fill in!" Alex tried.

"Bullshit!" Lena gasped. "You are a kinky bitch, I want to know what deviate behavior you have had to do!"

Alex laughed, but Gavin's discussion from the airport came back. That their lifestyle was labeled deviate. Lena meant it as a joke, but there it was. The first words out. Deviate.

"Nothing too bad," Alex assured her. "There really is nothing deviate about it."

"Come on!" Lena laughed. "All Paul and I do is the missionary position! If he is being lazy I get to be on top to spice it up! I want some freaky sex, so I have to live vicariously through you! Now details!"

"What do you want to know?" Alex laughed as Lena folded her arms.

"I don't care," Lena told her. "Let's start off with the craziest place!"

"Well," Alex smiled. "I gave him a blow job in a stall of the men's room in an upscale restaurant." She smiled with an embarrassed shrug as her face heated up.

"What?" Lena gasped. Just then Alex's phone went off and she was thankful. She smiled and showed Lena it was Gavin. She nodded.

"Hey," she said into the phone, she tried to get up but Lena took her by the arm to keep it from happening.

"Did Pavy get off alright?" Gavin asked her.

"No problems," Alex assured him.

"What did the drunk big mouth tell you that he shouldn't have?" Gavin's question was hard and she held her breath as she wondered what he meant. Did Pavel call him and warn him that Alex knew about Carla? Would he be pissed off she knew?

"What do you mean?" Alex asked cautiously.

"I mean the guy will say anything to get me in trouble," Gavin laughed. The laughter meant this had nothing to do about Carla. Thankfully.

"Well," Alex smiled sheepishly. "He told me you went on a honeymoon, but didn't get married?" Gavin growled on his end of the phone.

"I told you not to believe anything he says, right?" Gavin reminded her.

"You did, but after all I learned last night, I get the feeling that the more time I spend with Pavy, the more I'm going to learn about you!" She laughed. "I noticed you didn't outright deny the story."

"Christ! I was in high school!" Gavin defended.

"Well perhaps you should just tell me, or I'm going with Pavy's version," she teased.

"What did he tell you?"

"He said, you were having this fling with a chick you worked with at a restaurant," Alex smiled at Lena who was hanging on every word. "She got married, but it wasn't your typical wedding, while the groom went out that night drinking with his buddies, she came into work and saw you."

"Fuck," Gavin hissed. "She was pissed that he left on their wedding night," Gavin explained slowly. "She came in and we went out afterward. I...I can't believe he told you this story."

"And you fucked her, so she could have her revenge," Alex finished for him laughing into her hand. "Well every bride should get laid on her wedding night, traditionally it's the groom, but in a pinch...a gorgeous dark knight will do just fine!" She defended for him.

"I'm going to kill him," Gavin growled. Alex laughed as Lena covered her mouth in disbelief.

"Not denying any part of that story I see," Alex pointed out.

"Anything else?" Gavin asked her. Alex held her hand over the mouthpiece while she controlled her laughter. "Oh damn I hate him!" He growled. "What?"

"Well...," Alex laughed.

"Never mind," Gavin interrupted. "I don't want to know."

Elizabeth sat at a table in lounge. The papers from the conference lay in a scattered mess on it. She had tried to put last night out of her mind. It wasn't working, she had been distracted all day.

The events of last night came in struggled thoughts. There was Royce, on his knees injecting her with heroin. There was the feeling of elation as the drug pumped through her. Then it all faded into a dream like state. She remembered Royce on her. Felt him in her. She was unable to say anything. She then was on her stomach. Royce still in her. Having his way with her and she was unable to stop it. On one hand she was angry that Royce took advantage of her. On the other hand, she had her ultimate desire.

Royce's promise that if she left Gavin and became his sub he would let her ride his coat tails to Congress. The promise that Royce's father would help Royce become President.

If Royce wasn't lying to her, she could be a First Lady. If Royce wasn't lying. If nothing else she would be a congressman's wife. That in itself would be higher than she ever dreamed of. But a shot at the White House? Ridiculous. Only if Royce wasn't lying to her. He could very well be covering his ass. He knows he fucked up, could this all be a ploy to pacify her? To keep her from ruining him?

The rest of what he said the next morning after finding him in her bed bothered her as well. It was a threat. A subtle one. The threat of if she try to ruin him he would in turn ruin her. He would use the drugs against her. It would end the relationship with Gavin. She would be humiliated. She would be just another woman who would be ridiculed in the press if she went with just her word. She would have to rectify that.

"Hey," the voice drew her head up and she smiled pleasantly. It was one of her coworkers.

"Did you understand any of that shit?" the woman asked as she sat down.

"No," Elizabeth laughed at the dry statistic filled lecture they had to endure.

"You ok?" the woman asked her. "You look a little run down."

She did feel run down. She assumed it was an after effect of the heroin. She felt sluggish and her head hurt. She rubbed her toes under the table. The injection site itched as well. She remembered that is where Royce injected her, in between her toes, to keep it from Gavin. She would have to stay away from the needles until she was away from Gavin. She would also have to stay away from Royce. She couldn't go back against her vow with Gavin.

"Look," Elizabeth told her coworker. "I'm gonna hit the sack early, see if I can shake this bug before it gets started. See you in the morning for another fun filled day of dronery!"

Elizabeth sat at the desk working on the computer. She was waiting for Royce. She had texted him to meet her in the room. He never responded so she wondered if he even got it. The knock at the door told her he did.

Opening the door she saw him with champagne in his hands.

"I figured if you were going to turn down my offer you would have done it over the phone," he smiled holding up the bottle.

"There are some things I want to get straight," Elizabeth said moving away from the door.

"Ok," Royce frowned. "Sounds ominous."

Waking in she pointed to the chair and he sat. She smiled and took the bottle from him. Popping the top she poured them drinks.

"I want it on the record that what you did was wrong," she told him handing him a glass of champagne. "You took advantage of me, while I was passed out!" He nodded with a frown.

"Look," he began with a shake of his head. "I said I was sorry! You were just so damn sexy...I didn't think you would mind really. I mean you are leaving Gavin and are wanting to be with me...it was just a matter of poor timing!"

"No," Elizabeth said. "I decide if and when we fuck. I was out, you should have respected the fact I couldn't give you my permission and left me. But you didn't. You raped me."

"Rape is a strong word," Royce told her with a firm voice.

"What would you call it? Better yet, what would Gavin or a court of law call it? A woman, unconscious? You fucked me without permission, knowing I would have never given it to you!"

"What do you want me to say? I'm sorry? Fine, I'm sorry," he told her standing up. She dropped her head.

"You think that is enough?" Elizabeth asked him.

"I said I would make it up to you," Royce said with a tender hand to her face. "What do you want me to say? How can I make it up to you?"

"You can admit to me, for my conscious, that you raped me. That I had nothing to do with it. I didn't lead you to believe it would be ok," She said with a tear.

"I admit it," He said tilting her head up. "I took advantage of you."

"You raped me," she repeated.

"I raped you," he told her softly. "I can't take it back."

"Don't ever do it again," she warned him. "I belong to Gavin. Until that is over, I have a vow. Do you understand me?"

"I understand," he smiled. "Forgiven?"

"Only if you hold up your end of the bargain," she told him heading for the door. "I think you should leave, I don't want to screw up my last few weeks with Gavin. If he finds out you were in my room...he will know we fucked, I can't live with that if he knows. You keep your mouth shut, I will do the same."

He went to the door and looked down at her.

"Are you going to the White House with me," Royce asked her. She didn't answer, her smile was answer enough. Royce winked at her.

"Think about leaving him sooner rather than later," Royce said with soft plead. She nodded.

Once he was gone she leaned against the door and wiped the tear away. She went back to the computer and pulled up the video record function. She hit stop. That went better than she expected it to. Now if he backed out. She would ruin him! She also had proof for Gavin. If he found out that Royce fucked her, she had proof that she didn't want it. He would still be pissed about the drugs, but that could be forgiven. Violating his absolute of not sharing, well that couldn't be.

Chapter 17*

Alex was busily making dinner when his hands enveloped her around her narrow waist. His lips were next to touch her and it caused a river of shivers down her back. She gasped as she reveled in the soft feel of his warm lips.

"You don't have to cook for me," he whispered as he nuzzled her neck, pushing her pony tail to the side with his face so he could hit that one spot that always made her a puddle.

"I want to," she smiled as her legs quivered.

"So, Pavel got off ok?" he asked her.

"What-ever do you mean, Sir?" she teased as she dropped her whisk and gripped the side of the counter.

"What?" He asked, pulling his lips from her neck as the taste of her flesh was blinding him to the question. He then laughed at the unintended innuendo. "I love your dirty mind."

"Yes, he made the plane just fine," she smiled.

She kept her fingers gripping the counter to keep herself from touching him. That's what she wanted to do, to spin and put her hands on him. She never realized how much of a 'hands on' type person she was. She guessed it was because in her drawings and paintings she was touching the person she was drawing at all times.

"My dinner is going to burn," she warned him.

"I hope it's not the only thing on fire!" he teased, licking up the nape of her neck causing her to shiver uncontrollably.

They were eating dinner and Alex couldn't help loving the feel of the atmosphere. It was what she had been wanting. Gavin alone. No distractions. No Elizabeth. No party. Hopefully no phone calls.

"This is delicious," he complimented from behind his wine glass.

"Thank you, Sir," she beamed. "I love cooking. I love doing things with my hands despite those who like to keep me from it!"

"I have no idea what you are referring to," he laughed. She rolled her eyes with a playful smile.

"How was your appointment?"

"It was fine," he grimaced. It told her it wasn't fine.

"I love that you protect me at all times," she said shaking her head. "But do you think sometimes it does me a disservice?"

He looked at her and frowned.

"Look, like I said, there are some that shouldn't be Doms. They don't know how to control the situation. They risk too much. They go too far. It's easy to do in this lifestyle. You complain about the fact that I never let myself go, well that's why. I see the after of going too far, too often," he said setting his wine glass to the side.

"Was the sub alright?" she asked.

"Yes, he'll be fine," he shrugged. He then folder his hands under his chin and began to devour Alex from across the table.

"It blows me away that there are male subs!" Alex laughed. "So his mistress went too far?"

"Yes, even women can take it too far," Gavin nodded. "I stopped by Madelyn's on the way back and checked on Kelly." He said hoping to hide some of the darkness of his world with some good news for her.

"How is she?"

"She is good," Gavin nodded. "Her throat should be fully healed in the next couple of weeks. She is meeting a new Dom next week."

"Already?" Alex asked the concern filling her.

"Yes," Gavin smiled noticing her concern for a woman she barely knew. "He's a good man, this will be his third sub so she won't have to go into anything right off."

"Three subs?" Alex gasped.

"Yeah," Gavin said with a disapproving voice. "He likes to have several, a harem, if you will."

"Why don't you like that?" Alex asked him getting up and moving closer to him.

"I like the one on one closeness," he told her as she knelt at his feet.

She put her head on his leg and stroked his inner thigh.

"Stuff like this," he smiled as he stroked her pony tail softly. Running his fingers through her hair, starting at the knot of the bind in her hair and moving down to her free flowing hair.

"You can still have this," she smiled. "And have more than one sub."

"Alright," he laughed. He wanted to prove a point. A point he knew for a fact. "Let me ask you this, and be perfectly honest with yourself, even if you can't be with me."

"I'm always honest with you," she said in a hard tone that he smiled at.

"Have you not had a moment in the three weeks we have been together, where you looked at Elizabeth and didn't like her?" He asked with a gentle tug of her hair. "Where you didn't want her to be there. Or were just flat out jealous?"

"In all honesty," Alex smiled as she kissed his leg. "Yes."

"See?" he smiled. "Jealousy is very common in our world."

"I know," she laughed. She hated to admit he was right. She was afraid he would use it later against her. "I am a part of it. The kittens hate me!"

"Hate is a strong word," he smiled.

"Candy would claw my eyes out if she thought it would let her take my place," Alex laughed.

"Oh Candy!" he laughed. "Not even remotely interested in that one."

"That one?"

"Oh don't start!" he teased.

"No," she smiled. "I guess you're right. I am jealous. Jealous of Elizabeth. Jealous that she has you and I don't. I mean, if Elizabeth stays...," she let her voice trail off.

"If Elizabeth stays," he smiled at her. "What happens?"

"You will push me away," she said picking up her head and looking at him. "Your absolutes will win out. If Elizabeth at some point says she is not leaving. I will be the one left standing when the music stops."

"You think that?" Gavin asked her with a cocked head.

"I know that," she frowned. "So, part of me hopes she leaves quickly. Part of me hates that I want that. And part of me is just utterly confused at how this is all happening."

"You said it yourself," Alex frowned putting her head back down. "It's the sub that decides to end it. You decide to start it, but the sub, always...always, decides when it stops. If Elizabeth stays on, you will push me away. That I know as fact."

"Yet, here you are," he smiled putting his fingers on her skin. "Kneeling at my feet."

"Isn't that what I'm supposed to do?" she asked him.

"You can," he smiled. "It's not a big deal with me, I like the submissive position but not necessarily at my feet. Although right now, I loving it!"

"And that, for sure, is what I'm supposed to do, please you," she sighed. "I love doing that. I can't explain why that is. I can't explain why I have the drive to please you! It overwhelms me. Consumes me. I can think of nothing else. Have you put some spell on me?"

"I have," he whispered. "It's called pleasure. You are reciprocating the pleasure I have given you. It's an innate desire humans have. To repay. It can be both good and bad. Vengeance and repayment of pleasure. Two primal desires not yet stifled by civilization!"

She looked up at him and saw the fire crackling in his eyes. Desire. Another human trait not yet stifled she smiled.

"How can I please you sir?" she asked him kissing his hand.

"Stand up," he said softly.

She obeyed immediately and he pulled her in between him, seated in his chair, and the table. He slowly undid the buttons on her blouse, never dropping his eyes from hers. He slid his fingers along the edge of her bra cups causing her flesh to raise in pleasured bumps.

His fingers went up and over her clavicle, pushing the blouse from her and she let it drop to the table. His fingers came back down, lightly brushing her skin, down the center of her chest, across the soft globes of her breast which rose and fell quickly with her ever quickening breaths.

He didn't look at her, not in the face. He watched his fingers lightly touching her. He seemed fascinated by them. The way they felt on her. The way her skin responded to his touch. The way her soft brown skin, tanned by the sun, seemed to warm as he went. Like he was pushing a fire from the tips of his fingers into her skin.

Pulling her bra cup slightly he saw the color difference, from soft brown to the white from where her bikini covered her. He liked that. It was unlike Elizabeth who had just the one color. The milky white as she never went outdoors.

Down his electric fingers went, causing her to sigh. He smiled at the sound. Another pleasure of his. The sighs of pleasure. Unintended noises made by his subs letting him know that they were pleased.

Down to her skirt waist. Down the outside of her hips to the hem in her soft skirt. It was loose and free flowing. Easily accessible for his hands. Not tight like Elizabeth's. He liked the differences. A world of differences.

Up the outside of her thighs, the stockings she was wearing to drive him crazy. She told him she was never a big fan of them. But she recognized the look in his eye when she paraded around in them when she modeled a new outfit before he bought them for her. There was something sexy about black stockings, attached to garters.

He ran his fingers along the edge of them. Her legs opened easily, he felt her warmth between her legs. The thong she was wearing was easy to move to the side and he felt her wetness. He let his fingers drift through her soft pubic hair. It's soft line leading to pleasure. His and hers.

He put his head on her stomach and cupped her ass in his strong hands. He was fighting his own demons. He wanted to ravage her. To consume this delicious piece of sweet dessert. A perfect dessert to a perfect dinner. Her flesh. His dark demon begging to be released on her. To show her why he was so careful to control himself.