This is the third and final chapter. I hope you all like it...don't forget to vote.
MoogPlayer
~~~~~~
Chapter One
I took stock in what my sister told me that morning, and in doing so, I'd realized that I'd used the wrong approach with Penelope. As opposed to confronting her head on about her nightmares, I was going to have to facilitate a subtler tactic; and the only thing that was going to work was love, pure, unadulterated love. And once I realized this, I knew that I was going to have to swallow my own pride and try and find a way to apologize.
~~~~~~
I spent the rest of that day at the office, alone, and set into motion, the process of getting everything ready to go. The "Strong-Arm" wheel chair was going to be a success, and I was going to do everything within my power to see it through.
~~~~~~
I had a hard time getting to sleep that night. And when I did, the dreams I had were of a dark and frightening origin. I dreamed that I lost everything that was precious to me in the most horrifying of ways. I won't go into any detail as I've forgotten over the years.
However, suffice it to say that I kept searching anyway, searching for that which I would never find, lost in a cloud of despair, pain and agony, and destined to walk a wasteland of self-doubt, alone for all eternity. Little did I realize that these types of dreams would haunt me on a nightly basis for longer than I care to remember?
~~~~~~
I woke up the next morning feeling like I'd somehow lost a part of myself, and I experienced an emptiness inside of me the likes of which I'd never felt before. I decided to pour myself into my work to insure the promise I'd made to myself was kept. That's why I went into work that morning and called Richard Boles straight away.
"Hey Rich," I said, "I thought I'd give you a call this morning."
"Hey there, Bryan," he happily replied, "How're you doing?"
"Not too good," I grimly told him, "It's Penelope, she..."
He listened to what I had to say. I told him everything, omitting only the private moments between Penny and I, and when I was finished, He replied, "She's always been a headstrong girl, Bryan, even when she was little. It comes from being half Cheyenne; but if you give her some time to work everything out in her head, I think everything will be alright."
"I sure hope so, Rich..."
~~~~~~
When I came home that evening, Sam was on a date with Tommy which left Megan and me alone in the house. Megan and I had always been close growing up, and while I love Samantha dearly, I was glad that I'd have the opportunity to spend some quality time with my big sister.
"Are you hungry, Bry?" she asked, greeting me as I came through the back door, "I made your favorite, my chili."
"Oh, man," I wearily smiled, "That sounds perfect, thanks, Sis."
And as we ate, we reminisced about the past when we were younger. Our conversation for the first hour, or so, was spent asking things like, whatever happened to, and, I wonder where..."
Finally Megan looked at me and said, "How's your heart? I'm real worried about you, baby brother."
Swallowing the anguish and pain that was inside of me, as well as lying like a cheap rug, I smiled at her and said, "I'm fine, Megs, you're worrying for no reason."
"Yeah, right," she snorted, "Why don't you tell that shit to someone who'll believe you, because I'm not buying it for a second, Bryan."
"Come on, Megs," I groaned, "Look, you're right so; cut me a little slack, alright?"
Megan rose from the table, came around to where I sat on the other side, and then after leaning down and warmly wrapping her arms around me; she put the side of her face to mine and said, "I'm here if you want to talk; okay?"
"Okay," I smiled, "Thank, Megs, I love you."
"I love you, too, little brother..."
~~~~~~
I walked out onto my front porch later on that evening and simply laid back on one of the two large chaise lounges that were on the porch to relax. I thought about all the things that had taken place over the period of the last couple of months and how profoundly I'd been affected by them, but most of all; I though of Penelope...my pretty Penny.
My nights were filled with emptiness and my days were full of longing, longing for something I knew I'd never again have or hold dear, reducing me to a mere shell of a man. I couldn't help feeling like it was my fault for pushing the issue too hard. Perhaps I should've been gentler with her when it came to the issue of her nightmares.
Who was I trying to fool? She was gone and it looked like she wasn't coming back. And if I was truly going to be honest with myself, she was more deserving of someone more worthy than me. Hell, this woman was a Doctor for God's sake. She needed to be with someone who would stimulate her intelligence, as opposed to being with me. Hell, I was just a dumb ass construction hand and a guy like me would only tarnish her image.
~~~~~~
I drifted off to sleep that particular evening under the starlit canopy of the night, and in doing so, I felt that I was floating on a cloud, looking down upon myself as I slumbered. All at once everything became so blindingly bright that I had to momentarily close my eyes.
When I opened them again I found myself alone on a great plain, a mountainous backdrop on the not too distant horizon. The night was calm, the moon full, and I heard the howling of a wolf somewhere in the distance. I couldn't explain why, but I somehow felt at peace with myself in the same way a child feels in the arms of its mother.
I closed my eyes again, only this time hen I opened them; I found myself lying beneath a bearskin, inside of a tipi. Suddenly I felt a soft palm against the side of my cheek, and when I looked up, I realized my head was lying in Nala's lap.
"You are weary, my son," she softly told me, "You have grown into a strong yet, kind and gentle man. But in your heart; you are still a frightened Ka'escone, (Cheyenne word for child). Your heart is in darkness right now, but you will find your way back to the light through your music, my son. And through your music, she will find you.... she will find you...."
~~~~~
The sound of Sam saying, "Wake up, Uncle Bryan," brought me from my slumber, making me open my eyes to find myself back on my front porch again with her kneeling beside me.
"Hi, sweetie," I sleepily smiled, "What time is it?"
"It's well after midnight," she sweetly giggled, "And Mom told me to tell you to come back inside and go to bed."
~~~~~~
I awoke the next morning feeling at least a little better than I had been the past days. Over breakfast that morning Megan and Sam had both asked me, because the weather was so nice, to take them out on the boat.
"What about work?" I asked, "What am I supposed to do about that, huh?"
"I called Jessie at home this morning," Megan pointedly replied, "And she said that they could handle things while you were gone, and that there was nothing to worry about."
"Aw, hell," I sighed, with Sam squealing and Megan victoriously smiling, the both of them knowing that I could never deny either of them anything they asked of me.
~~~~~~
Once we were underway and out on the river, Sam approached me intending to ask something of me, I could tell by the look on her pretty little face.
"Okay, Sam," I grinned, "What do you want now?"
"Why, Uncle Bryan," she gasped, feigning mock innocence," What makes you think I want something?"
"Because I know you, little girl," I chuckled, "And I can always tell when you're up to something so; spit it out."
"Well," she began, smiling at me the way she always had since she was little, "I have a friend in Dallas who's going to be attending Vanderbilt University, too. Her name is Sara Winston and she comes from a great family, but they can barely afford...."
Yes, Sam," I interrupted smiling.
"Yes, what?" she mischievously grinned, "You don't even know what I was going to ask you."
"Yes I do," I chuckled, "You were going to ask me if she can stay with us while you two go to college, isn't that right?
"So, you don't care," she wistfully asked, "I mean, it's really okay?"
"Yes, it's okay," I smiled, "Your Mom told me that you two are going back to Dallas next week to get ready to move back home, as well as making the arrangements to put the house up for sale so; why don't you bring her back with you?"
"Oh, thank you, Uncle Bryan," Sam squealed, throwing her arms around my neck, "I love you so much."
"You're welcome, baby girl," I grinned, "And I love you, too."
"Can I use your mobile phone?" she wistfully asked, "I want to call her and tell her the good news."
"Go ahead," I grinned, handing her the phone, "But don't stay on too long."
~~~~~~
"She loves you so much," Megan smiled, as she and I sat on the stern while Sam floated in the lake on an inner tube, "You spoil her entirely too much."
"Yeah," I laughed, "And I do it on purpose, too."
"Hey, Uncle Bryan," Sam called from the water, "Can we spend the night on the water tonight?"
"Sure," I replied, looking at Megan, "If your Mom wants to, that is."
"As long as I get to cook," Megan smiled.
~~~~~~
Later that evening as we sat down to eat beneath a canopy of stars, three large citronella candles being our only source of light, I thoroughly enjoyed being with two of my most favorite people in the world. And even though my heart was breaking wide open at the time, the love of my family was what held the wolves at bay when I went to sleep that night...at least for a little while anyway.
~~~~~~
That night I dreamed of Penelope and all of the tender moments we'd shared in the time we'd spent together. While my dreams were pleasant, I still felt something beneath it all, something that I couldn't put my finger on, but something disturbing, none the less.
I wasn't sure how long I'd been asleep when I suddenly awoke in a cold sweat. I looked over at my clock and saw that it was still early, four-fifteen in the morning. Knowing that I wouldn't be going back to sleep anytime soon, I got out of bed and put on a pair of shorts and a tee shirt.
Then I made my way out and up to the galley and turned on the coffee pot that I'd set on a timer the night before. I fixed my coffee that morning with a shot of Jim Beam bourbon, for medicinal purposes of course; and then climbed up on the flying bridge to sit and drink my coffee.