Is Love All or Nothing?

Wow...now on chapter 12. When I go back and reread from the beginning I realize how far I've progressed the story. Thank you all my loyal followers and new ones. As always, thank you Tigersman for being my editor and making these stories look as clean as possible.

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"Keith is taking you where?" Melissa asks shocked and excited at the same time.

"He's taking me to his parent's lake house for the weekend," Jackie says nonchalantly.

"Just you and him?"

"Yes, why is this such a big deal to you?"

"How can you not see how big this is?" Melissa screams in excitement. "It will be just you and him for a whole weekend! No Andy, no Luke, no Lauren and no me! Just two nights and a day together."

"Well more like three days and three nights," Jackie says with a big grin. "He and I took Friday off of work and we are heading up Thursday after he gets off."

Melissa puts her coffee down and covers her mouth with both of her hands trying to suppress her screams of excitement. "Oh my god! Are you ready for this?"

"I think we are. This will definitely be a big test for us to see if we can really stand each other for three whole days."

"Are you worried at all you might see some sides of him that might scare you?" Melissa asks knowing Jackie hasn't seen all the sides of Asperger's can present.

"I'm not really worried, just curious if he lets his guard down more around me. I know he is still trying to protect me from seeing some of the negative effects Asperger's can have on him, but I want to see them so I know what else I am getting into."

"What happens if you see something that scares you?"

That thought hadn't really crossed Jackie's mind. They were going up in Keith's car and if things got bad she would have to drive back home with him still. It had been a couple of months since he blew up at her, but she felt guilty about pushing him too much that night too. While the relationship ended up growing stronger in the end, it also almost ended that night.

"I guess we'll just have to cross that road if we come to it," Jackie responds. She takes a sip of her coffee hoping Melissa will drop it.

As much as Melissa wants to know what backup plans Jackie has, she can tell the conversation is really starting to make her uncomfortable.

"So do you think Lauren had a good time with us last night?"

Jackie sets her cup down on the table, smiling, thinking the good time they all had. "I believe she did and I think she is starting to feel more comfortable around us. I don't want her to feel like an outsider."

"Me neither. She seems really sweet. I really do hope things between her and Andy work out."

"I'm sure they will," Jackie says confidently. "I just hope she can get past Andy not telling her about Keith having Asperger's. I get why she wants to know what the secret is."

"That reminds me to make sure Luke doesn't tell her or accidently let that slip."

"When did he find out?"

"Oh, yeah. I guess I forgot to mention that last night Keith told him."

"Wow. That is big."

"Still not as big as you spending the weekend alone with Keith," Melissa says grinning.

Jackie rolls her eyes in disbelief. "Coming from the woman who suspects she might be engaged sometime soon."

"Ok, I'll admit that is big, but your thing will involve a lot more fucking."

"We're not going to just have sex while we are up there."

"Oh yeah? Then what do you two have planned?"

"Most likely watch movies with a fire going in the fireplace, get to know each other better and just relax. He did say he wanted to take me out to dinner at a restaurant that is right next to the lake house."

"Other than the fire, all those things can be done here," Melissa says not convinced.

"Honestly, it is just a chance also for us to get away from everyone and see each other for who we are. I want to see what he is like when it is truly just me and him for more than just a night."

Melissa is still not fully convinced of the reasons, but knows she will not get anything more out of Jackie if she tries to push harder. "So how far away is the lake house?"

"He tells me it is about two hours away in good traffic. It could take longer if we hit traffic by Lansing."

"Or construction. Michigan does only have two seasons, winter and construction."

"Tell me about it. I just hope we don't get snowed in."

*************************************

"So do you think you're really ready for a whole weekend alone with Jackie?" Andy asks as he watches Keith pack his suitcase from the doorway of Keith's bedroom.

"I'll tell you the answer to that after this weekend," Keith says, trying to find a specific hoodie in his closet he wants to bring.

"Are you crazy?" Andy asks, wondering what his best friend is thinking. "Spending the night with each other is one thing. Spending a holiday with her family is big, but a whole weekend of just you two alone? She is not prepared for this."

Keith turns around with anger in his eyes. "And when will she be prepared? There is nothing she can do to prepare living with someone with Asperger's other than living with the person."

Andy recognizes the tone from Keith's voice and knows he upset Keith greatly. "I'm sorry, I'm just worried."

Keith takes a deep breath, realizing he overreacted. "I'm sorry too. I just want to do things normal couples do. I don't want to limit myself just because I have Asperger's. I've already done more than what my family thought I could and I'll be damned if I don't make this relationship work."

"You have done a lot that some people thought you could not but I think there is more to it than that."

"Are you talking about Jillian?" Keith asks.

"I know you better than you think. I know you still worry that you might still screw this up."

Keith takes in Andy's words and ponders them. Jillian does still screw with his mind even though he never sees her, never hears from her, but still is always in the back of his mind. He worries he might do something that will cause Jackie to end the relationship. Everything about this weekend is a risk for him.

"This weekend could be a mistake, but it could be the thing that makes this relationship unbreakable." Keith stares into Andy's eyes. "This is a chance for me and Jackie to talk about things we are afraid to talk about. I know I may be pushing things, but I don't want to hide anything from her and I want her to know see who I am."

"You love her that much. This is all or nothing for you."

"Everything always is with me," Keith says with a smile.

"Not everything," Andy responds. Keith looks at him confused, wondering what the hell he is talking about. "You are much more normal around Jackie than you realize. Yes, you do your best to guard her from the worst parts of Asperger's but to everyone outside our group you two look like a normal couple. You have taken things slow, listened to Jackie, and never overreacted to her other than that one time." That gets a laugh out of Keith. "You laugh, but I want you to listen carefully to what I'm about to say.

"You are my best friend and from the moment we first met, I knew there was something odd about you. What I didn't know was how much you would change me and my perspective on life. I had to change how I acted around you, talked to you, hell, I had to watch how much sarcasm I used around you because you missed it half the time. I didn't realize how much I was changing until I went on a date with Jasmine Smith."

"You told me that date went horribly."

"Yeah," Andy says, remembering that lie he told Keith. "It actually went really well. I was having a great time with her and we talked about a lot of things. You came up somehow in the conversation. I was talking about you and then she dropped something I didn't expect. She told me that I was becoming a better person because of you."

"Why did that shock you?"

"Because I didn't see what she was talking about. Being twenty and stupid, I thought she was just trying to be nice and blew the compliment off. It wasn't until after I got back from the date did I think about what she said while I laid in my bed."

"That was the last date you went on for a long time if I remember," Keith says, thinking back to that night. "You seemed really weird for the next few days and then you seemed to snap out of whatever funk you were in."

"It was a phone call I had with my mom that snapped me out of it," Andy says, remembering that conversation with his mom. "She never liked the person I was in high school. She always thought I was a hothead and thought everything should just be given to me."

"Well you were a hothead and a jerk. It took a lot for me not to throw punches at you for those first few weeks."

"I know," Andy says frowning, looking at the floor, thinking of the person he was back then, "and you had every reason to be mad at me. I pushed your buttons and yet you stayed around. I didn't deserve anyone as a friend back then, much less you." Andy looks back up at Keith. "Yet learning about how your mind operates, getting used to how you think and...just getting to know who you are somehow changed me. It is because of you I'm the man Lauren wants to be with. It is because I had to learn how to listen to you that caused me to listen very well when my former boss told me to do stuff at Brownstead. Because I had to learn how to talk to you, I was able to understand that the employees under me need to be pushed to be better in different ways. Keith, you helped make me the man I am today."

Keith didn't know what to say to all of that. So much of his life he always felt like a burden to his friends and family. His family had to make a separate dinner for him half the time because he was such a picky eater. He never really fit in any social group in school and would sometimes float from table to table during lunch. He was rarely asked to go over to anyone's house and most of his friends just seemed like acquaintances in the end, never really trying to get to know the real him.

He wasn't diagnosed with Asperger's until his sophomore year in high school, but kept it to himself not knowing how people would react. He was already bullied somewhat by the jocks and didn't need more fuel to be added to the fire.

This whole conversation started to change Keith's self-worth, making him realize he is not a burden to anyone. If anything he is making other people's lives better.

"Andy...thank you for telling me."

"You're welcome. By the way, the hoodie you're looking for is in my closet. You left it in my place and never asked for it back."

******************************

"So how long have your parents had the place?" Jackie asks trying to find out more about the place before they get there.

"They've had it for three years now I believe."

"Why did they decide to get it?"

"They wanted a place that was quiet to spend weekends at. It also helps having a boat to go out on the lake in the summer."

"I bet you'd love to see me in my bikini on the boat," Jackie says with a naughty smile.

"Oh you know I'd love to see that," Keith says with an equally naughty smile. "But then I'd have to beat all the other meatheads and I only have so much time in the day."

"Don't forget I'd have to make sure all the women stay off of my sexy man. You belong to me and no other woman will ever have you."

Keith makes a turn into a dirt driveway and Jackie lays her eyes for the first time on the lake house. It is light blue on the outside with stairs leading up to a deck. There is also a garage door that is painted dark brown. He hits the garage door opener and drives into the garage. He turns off the engine and says, "Welcome to the casa Williams."

Keith pops the trunk and they get their suitcases out of the car. He then unlocks the door and they enter into the basement. He flips the light switch to reveal light blue colored walls, an old dark brown dresser with a small HD TV on top of it and a blue couch. He leads her up a set of stairs and opens the door to the main hallway and into the main area. On the left is the living room with a green couch, two recliners, a rocking chair and a spinning chair with another HD TV in the corner, but bigger than the one in the basement. To their left is the kitchen table and the kitchen right next to it on the right. The walls are all wood paneling.

Jackie takes a good look around before she speaks. "This place is nice! It definitely has the feel of a secluded, quiet cottage. I could see myself alone with you for a whole week here."

"Let's start with an extended weekend and maybe we can do a week over the summer," Keith says trying not to sound too cautious.

Keith then takes her up to the second floor where there is a green bedroom with two twin beds, bathroom, and a sky blue bedroom with two queen beds. He then takes her back downstairs and shows her the master bedroom.

"Go ahead and hop in," Keith says.

Jackie looks at him confused. "Should we get undressed before we fuck?"

Keith chuckles at her response. "That will happen later. Just get under the covers and lie down and you'll understand soon enough."

Jackie still doesn't get it but does as Keith tells her. Once she gets under the comforter and lays her head on the pillow she realizes that she might not want to get out of the bed the rest of the day. After a few minutes Keith quickly pulls the covers off before she can react.

"Hey," Jackie says in protest, "I was comfortable and ready to sleep."

"We can sleep after dinner. I want to take you to that restaurant I was telling you about."

Jackie lays her head back on the pillow. "You can go without me. This bed is too comfortable for me to leave."

"Too bad. I was going to pay for dinner and whatever wine you wanted."

Not one second after Keith finishes his sentence Jackie immediately jumps out of the bed. "Ok, let's go then."

They get back into his car and take a short drive to the restaurant. The outside of the place doesn't impress Jackie. To her it looks boring with nothing setting it apart. However, once inside she is blown away. She's amazed at the warm, cabin feel yet feels upscale. As the hostess walks them to their table Jackie sees the place not as empty as she thought it would be on a Thursday night in December.

After they sit down, Keith smiles, looking at Jackie and she is taking everything in.

"Not quite what you expected is it?"

"Not at all," Jackie says as she is still looking around. "I hope the food is as good as this place looks."

"The food is even better," their waitress says as she approaches the table. "Where's the rest of the family Keith?"

That caught Jackie off guard. Did the waitress and Keith know each other from before?

"They're back home," Keith says. "I brought my girlfriend up here for the weekend."

The waitress turns and looks at Jackie with her eyes wide. "It's nice to meet you. I'm Shannon and I'll be your waitress for the evening. Is there anything I can start you off with to drink?"

Jackie wasn't fully recovered from the shock but did her best to compose herself. "Umm, what wines do you have?" Shannon lists off some of the wines from memory and Jackie hears of a Merlot that she likes. "I'll have the Merlot."

"Great choice. That is one of my favorites. I assume you'll want a tall Budweiser Keith?"

"Yep, but just the one tonight. I still have to drive back to the house."

"No problem. I'll be right back with your drinks."

Shannon walks away and Jackie watches her as she walks. Keith can't figure out why Jackie is looking her that way and it is a mystery he needs solved.

"Is there some reason you're staring at our waitress as she goes to get our drinks?"

Jackie turns her attention back to Keith. "I'm just confused on how you two know each other. I thought you said your parents have only had the place for a few years."

Keith is still not understanding what is confusing about all of this. "Yes and every time over the past couple years we've come up here to eat she's been our waitress. We ask for her by name pretty much every time now because she always gives us great service."

"She just seemed really friendly to you like...you two were pretty close or something."

"Oh," Keith says remembering that Jackie had been cheated on before. "You think me and Shannon were...no. She is a sweetheart but I never asked her out or anything."

"Why not? She does seem sweet and very beautiful and-"

"I only want you," Keith says interrupting Jackie's sentence. "I don't care about any other woman and how sweet she is or how beautiful she looks. I only want you and will only pursue you."

That helps put Jackie's mind more at ease but she still fears something in the back of her mind. Before she could think of something else to ask Keith Shannon comes back with their drinks.

"Here you go," Shannon says as she places the drinks on the table. "Have you two decided what you wanted to eat yet?"

"Not yet," Keith says. "Jackie here has been admiring your beauty a little too much."

"Keith!" Jackie nearly yells as her faces turns red.

"Well it is nice to be admired by a woman I guess over some of the perverted idiots that come by," Shannon says looking at Jackie. "But I wish I could pull off your natural beauty. I'm sure that is something that made Keith approach you in the first place."

Jackie chuckles at the last thing Shannon said. "I actually approached him first."

Shannon's eyebrows raise at finding that out. "Really?" She turns and sees Keith looking away. "So did she ask you out that night or what?"

"I actually made a fool of myself and walked out on her," Keith says still looking away from them.

"Wait, but then how?" Shannon asks, confused as to how they got to be in a relationship then.

"Maybe we'll tell you at the end of our meal," Jackie says wanting to save Keith from embarrassing him more. "Give us a few minutes to look at the menu."

"No problem," Shannon says and she walks off to take care of another table.

"Thank you," Keith says as he slowly faces Jackie again.

"You're welcome and besides, I can't have you running off on me again. It is a little cold for me to walk back to the lake house."

That gets a good laugh out of Keith. They take a look at the menu and Keith decides to go for the NY Strip and Jackie settles on a Hawaiian flatbread. A few minutes later Shannon comes back and takes their order.

Jackie then asks how Keith's parents found the lake house and decided they wanted to buy it. He told her about how they wanted a nice quiet getaway for the weekends but also a place where the whole family could get together for the summer holidays and have fun. His parents got the place thinking that one day he and his sister would get married and have kids. As soon as kids are mentioned, Jackie realizes they haven't talked about that yet.

"Do you want to have kids?" Jackie asks.

"Yes, but I would like to wait until I'm married to you before I get your pregnant."

"Oh, what makes you think I'll say yes to you anyway?"

"Because I love you, I make you feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, will always protect you and," Keith leans in forward so that only Jackie can hear what he says next, "I give you the best orgasms."

Jackie blushes and she can't deny any of those facts, especially the last one. "Back to my original topics, how many kids do you want to have?"

"Honestly," Keith starts, "I would love to have four kids but I would settle for two."

"Why are you willing to settle for less?"

"Because I'm not the one who has to carry the baby for nine months and then give birth."

"That is very true," Jackie says, impressed that Keith is very reasonable on the issue. "I would love to have three kids, but I want one of them to be a girl of course."

"You want to be your daughter's best friend don't you?"