I walked in from work and sitting on the table was a note, some garments, and A History of Western Fashion opened to the Greek page. Well, this will be fun. The note is written to a person in Greek, because of course it is. On it, it says:
"I found you the closest approximation of period clothing. Please rinse off and leave your work clothes on my wheelchair. Be ready to green upon coming in. Remember his personality in Civ 5? Apparently that's about accurate. And he died at 32 not 24. This is important. He was also really into the Persian culture that he co-opted. Love you, can't wait to see this work.
-Cassia"
Cool. So this is really happening, I thought to myself. I went outside to where the trash bags that needed to go to the dumpster awaited my arrival. I took them to the proper trash burial mound, and on my way back in I noticed the porch light was out. I decided to change it, because no one can build anticipation like this guy. And I don't have pointless twists that aren't really twists like M. Night Shyamalan.
I proceeded to do as instructed, removing first my chef's coat, then my undershirt, revealing the tan skin that hid underneath. I then removed my pants, which smelled like Nacho Night at Mi Gusta, and slowly lowered my camouflage boxer shorts to reveal the small, manageable tangle of hair and my throbbing cock. I had been waiting for this all night and had a hardening slab of concrete just thinking about it. At least the hair is historically accurate, I thought. I climbed into the hot water of the shower. I winced every time my hands slid over my cock and slowly stroked myself just for the hell of it. I didn't orgasm. I couldn't let myself. I knew that would make the coming eruption of Vesuvius that much sweeter.
I shuddered and finished my shower, dried of with my favourite Haunter-purple towel, and went in to look at these "garments." Laid out form me was a braided leather belt, a piece of rectangular blue fabric from Odin-Knows-Where, a yellow scarf, and an honest-to-Heimdall, black dress.