With apologies to U2. This story is a sequel of sorts to No Going Home. I would encourage you to read it first. Constructive criticism and feedback are welcome.
The phone rang at 7 am. "Who could be calling at 7 am?" thought Stephanie. She ignored the handset as it rang three more times before cutting out to voicemail. After another night of tossing and turning around her very pregnant belly, and the intermittent kicking within, Stephanie remained exhausted and desperate for sleep. She buried herself beneath the comforter, pulled a pillow tight above her head and sunk back into slumber.
*****
By 9 am, I had gotten almost another two hours of sleep, but I was still very tired. I could hear Stella banging around the kitchen and watching her cartoons. At six years old she was a fortuitously independent little girl. I felt miserable. My daughter shouldn't have to fend for herself, but the pregnancy-induced sleep deprivation was taking its toll. We'd been 'there' before. There had been a time, a few years ago, when I was so sick Stella would wake me with a tug.
"Mommy, Mommy, I'm hungry. Can you make me breakfast?" she would ask.
It shamed me, but my debilitating, and reoccurring, mononucleosis could suck the very life out of me. The fact that my husband was deployed to Iraq at the time didn't help. Back then I was almost broken. The stress of his departure, worries over his safety, tending to a toddler, and being sick, all combined to create a miserable life for my daughter and me.
It took years to recover, and the growing baby inside me was a testament to our persistence to provide Stella with a brother or sister. The baby was our little miracle child. After I got better we tried for years with no success. The fact that I got pregnant seven months ago when Jack was home on a two week R&R from yet another deployment -- this time in Afghanistan -- made for an amusing story. But we were also, ever so grateful.
We were older parents. Together for over a decade before having Stella and closer to two decades before this wonder baby came along. "Baby-baking is definitely a young woman's game," I said quietly to myself. At 38, I was about done with baby-making. It had been hard enough to get this child. I reluctantly slid out of the warm covers and into some fuzzy slippers, and headed for the kitchen for some much-needed coffee -- well, decaf anyway.
I walked out of the bedroom into the waiting arms of little Stella in her pajamas. She heard me stumbling about my bedroom and rushed to greet me with a big smile and open, grasping arms. I tried, mostly unsuccessfully, to temper her enthusiasm around my swelling belly as I tousled her coiled hair and hugged her to me.
Stella yelled, way too loud, "Mommy! Good morning, Mommy! Good morning, baby!" She kissed my flannel-clad stomach as she hugged my legs.
Baby was still just 'baby.' We never learned the Stella's gender until she arrived, and I hadn't found out about this baby either. Oh, I wanted to; it would make some things so much easier. But Jack liked surprises. And since he was gone and I had to go to all the pre-natal visits alone or with Stella...well, it wouldn't have been fair to him to find out by myself. And Stella couldn't keep a secret to save her life. I had to admit I liked 'good' surprises too.
All three of us talked about names in letters, emails and Skype sessions. Sometimes, it seemed that's all we talked about! As the due date drew closer we got more desperate. We recently settled on a girl name -- Sophia Bella, a great companion to older sister, Estella Vita -- but the boy name was proving impossible to agree upon. You would think seven months is enough time to come up with one girl name and one boy name, but no! No such luck. At least Jack would be home soon... real soon. He was due back in a matter of days. Then we could work on that tough job together, as a family!
I stumbled to the kitchen, on auto-pilot. We had a small whiteboard, on the wall, with the names we considered and discarded. I stared, absentmindedly, at it and guessed at other options as I prepared coffee and a bagel for myself. To my dismay, Stella loudly drummed her spoon in her bowl as she ate the cereal she made for herself. Finally, with coffee in hand, I joined her at the kitchen table. No sooner had I sat down, and I remembered. The phone. Some jackhole -- combination of a jackass and asshole -- called at 7 am. I labored my big belly back out of the chair long enough to trek to the receiver and check messages on speaker.
"Sorry honey..." said Jack's gruff voice.
I chuckled to myself and said, under my breath "Oh, it was THAT jackhole."
Thankfully, Stella didn't hear me, but she did recognize her father's voice. Then she immediately screamed "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" and jumped up and down, preventing me from hearing the rest of the message.
"Shh, darling. Let me listen, please," I gently scolded. I played the message again.
"Sorry honey, delayed again in Frankfurt. You know the deal....I'll see you all when I see you. Love you all."
I grimaced. Yes, I most certainly 'know the deal.' I had 20 years of Army girlfriend/wife experience. You can fly commercial anywhere in the world in 24 hrs, but the U.S. Army takes 10 days...or more. He was supposed to be home as early as tomorrow, but now, as always, it would take longer. I counted the days on my fingers. One day in Ghazni, two days in Bagram, seven days, I think, in Kuwait. Now he's in Frankfurt. Getting closer, but not close enough. I'd long ago given up on telling Stella when he was expected. She could only be disappointed. Like now.
"Mommy? When is Daddy coming home?" she asked. She stared down at her bowl with sad eyes.
"Soon, darling. Soon," I said as I slid over to give her a tight hug, and ruffled my fingers through her curly dark hair.