Chapter Five: Letting it all Out
"Just great," I said as I pulled into work. Hank was waiting for me inside the parking lot.
As I parked, he started heading over to me.
He wouldn't be stupid to try something with all my co-workers standing around, so I got out of the car and stared at him as he walked toward me.
"What?" I asked.
"Now, you're fucking," he stopped as he saw some of the black males from my job standing at the loading dock.
"Go ahead," I said with a smile. "Say it, I dare you," I said as I looked at him.
"You know what I was going to say," Hank shook his head.
"No, I don't, I want you to say it loud and proud," I smiled as I looked at him.
Again, he looked at the loading dock, then shook his head. Hank was many things suicidal wasn't one of them.
"You're the one that came here, I didn't invite you," I said as I got my things out of my car. "You have something to say, then say it, or get the fuck gone."
"If I knew you liked those kinds, I would have never allowed you in my hotel room," Hank shook his head.
"You're still on that?" I laughed. "It wasn't that big of a deal, I have watched commercials that have lasted longer," I shook my head.
Hank stepped closer to me as I challenged his manhood.
"What? You don't like the truth?" I said, shaking my head. "You are losing your touch."
There was a time when Hank could fuck me into exhaustion, and I was sure those days were way behind him. He had a beer gut and even standing here in the sun. I could see he was breathing heavily.
"Fuck you," Hank shook his head. "I tried to come back here and help you out, but you know what, you're not worth it!"
Hank walked away and headed for his bike. "Enjoy your colored boyfriend," he said as he started his motorcycle.
I didn't have it in me to tell him that Andrew was just someone doing work around the house. If he wanted to believe I was fucking Andrew, that was on him.
"Bye," I waved as he roared out of the parking lot.
"So, you're sleeping with a brother," Logan asked as I walked into the office through the loading dock.
"You wish," I smiled.
Logan and the other dock workers were harmless. Even if Hank said the word, they would probably yell at him or tell him off, but none of them would hurt him.
As for me, they were my co-workers, sure they would call me names and whistle at me, but not one of them made a serious move on me, even after the divorce.
My favorite was Ms. New Booty. I had to listen to the song to get the meaning, but the name fitted me, so I let them keep it.
"One day that ass is going to have a brother hitting it from behind, mark my words," Johnathan said.
"Only when he is dreaming," I smiled as I went to my office.
I had nothing against interracial dating or relationships. It wasn't for me, not that I didn't find some males of different ethnicities attractive. I couldn't see myself with someone I didn't have a lot of things in common with, and for the most part, none of the guys I had met so far clicked on any level.
Sure, coming from the woman that fucked four guys on a whim all at once in every imaginable way possible until all of us were laid out all over the place exhausted was kind of hypocritical. Okay, it was totally hypocritical, but that part of me was long gone.
I wanted something like I had with Jacob that meant the world to me. I wanted someone that woke up every day and thought of me, and before they went to bed, they wished I was in bed with them. I didn't want to just fuck and not be with that someone romantically anymore.
I had that one night with Hank because I needed to think clearly, and I was hoping he would accept that it was a one-time thing.
"Thanks again for last night," I told Charles as he popped into my office.
"No problem," Charles responded. "He pulls that shit again, just let me know."
I nodded as I went deep into my work, putting Hank out of my head.
'We need to talk,' Jacob texted me just after lunch.
'Okay, can it wait, or do you want me to call you?' I replied.
'It can wait, meet me at your bar, after work,' Jacob said.
I agreed and wondered what it was about. Hopefully, he still wasn't mad about my stupid comment last night before he left the house.
I hurried to the bar after work and saw Jacob sitting in his usual booth in the corner.
"Thought you were off today?" Trevor asked.
"I am," I said as I headed for the booth.
"I ordered mozzarella sticks for you," Jacob said as I sat down.
"Oh no," I said, shaking my head.
I loved mozzarella sticks. They were my favorite appetizers. The last time Jacob ordered my favorite, he told me he had proposed to Alyssa, and the time before that, he told me they were moving in together.
"Pull the band-aid," I said as I picked up one of the sticks.
"She's pregnant," Jacob said with a big smile.
"What!" I said, dropping the stick back on the plate.
Jacob and I had tried for another child multiple times, and it never happened. The specialist said it was by pure luck that I had got pregnant the first time, as Jacob had a meager sperm count, and the sperm he had were low activity. She said it was a rare condition, which meant the chances of us getting pregnant again was very low.
"I know!" Jacob said as he continued to smile.
'That fucking bitch!' I thought as he stared at me. I could rip her head right off her shoulders if she were here.
"You're mad," Jacob said as he saw the look on my face.
"How?" I asked.
"I don't know," Jacob shook his head. "We weren't even trying; Alyssa had gotten used to the idea that we would never have our own kids. And last night, she told me we were expecting."
I didn't know what to say. Part of me wanted to ask if he was sure it was his, but I knew Alyssa. She wouldn't do a thing like that, not even if someone threatened her. She was more loyal than a dog.
"Say something," Jacob said; this time, he stopped smiling.
"What do you want me to say," I said, pushing the plate away. "You want me to be happy, sure, I am happy for Clayton he has always wanted a baby brother or sister, there I said it."
"Wow, way to be mature," Jacob shook his head. "Remind me again who cheated on who?"
I shook my head and looked at him.
"I get it," I nodded. "I did it, I am the reason that baby isn't inside me and not her, I wake up to that realization every single day, but you need to stop rubbing it in my face!"
Jacob nodded. "It wasn't my intention, I thought we were friends, and you would want to hear it from me, and not someone else."
"Congratulations," I said as I stood up. "Good luck with the marriage and the baby and everything else, but from now on, let me hear it from someone else, this," I said as I motioned at the table and then to the both of us, "Is too hard on me, so can you do that? Please?"
