Rachel froze in place as she watched Noah rush down the hallway. It didn't feel like she was awake. She hoped that it was all a dream, one Rachel desperately wanted to wake up from. She looked back at the party guests, relieved to see they were beginning to exit the apartment. That took care of one problem at least, she could only handle so much embarrassment in one night.
God, the embarrassment. Why did she think it was a good idea to explore this in front of a crowd? Rachel wondered if she'd taken things too far and ruined the evening for everyone. They just wanted to have a good time. She didn't have to participate in the balloon game. No, in fact, she shouldn't have. She should have stayed by Noah's side and spent the evening laughing with him. Rachel shook her head in frustration, quickly following after Noah while the four began putting the apartment back in order.
Stupid. It was all so stupid. She should've been more attentive to Noah, she should have done a better job reading the room.
And she shouldn't have gotten so lost in Jack's eyes.
Rachel's heart fluttered as she recalled that moment, but it was a thought she stuffed down quickly. Jack meant nothing to Rachel. That moment meant nothing, it was just a game.
Rachel tried to focus, opening several bedroom doors until she finally found Noah in a barren guest room. He was huddled in a corner, arms wrapped around his legs with his head buried between them. It broke Rachel's heart to see him like that.
"Hey," Rachel said, walking over to Noah's side and sitting next to him. Noah didn't respond, and that didn't surprise her. She allowed silence to hang in the room for a while. After all, it wasn't like Rachel even had the words to say. This was all new territory for her. It was confusing, messy, and exciting. But at the end of the day, what Rachel wanted more than anything, was Noah.
She slowly wrapped her arm around his and to her relief, felt him interlock his fingers with hers. He raised his head and looked at her, but still didn't say anything. Rachel smiled before taking a deep breath.
"I'm sorry if it went too far," Rachel said.
"You... you don't need to be sorry. We both said it was ok. I..." Noah was struggling to put his words together. Rachel could feel his body trembling as he spoke.
"We don't need to talk about it right now. It's ok," She said, gently squeezing his hand tightly. "We don't even have to stay here, everyone is leaving. Do you want to get going?"
"I don't think I can right now... I... I think I need a little bit more time before..." Noah's words trailed off. His lip began to tremble. A few tears trickled down his cheeks as he turned his head away from her. Rachel felt absolutely gutted.
"I'm so sorry. We don't ever have to do this again, I promise." Rachel meant every word she said. Seeing Noah this way made her determined to ensure it never happened again. She would not be the reason for his sadness, that much she was absolutely sure of.
"That's not what I want..." Noah answered. Rachel's brow furrowed in confusion.
"But... look at how upset it made you. This isn't healthy if it makes you this miserable Noah," Rachel said. Noah's eyes closed in concentration.
"I know it's a lot... I know I'm being a lot right now, and I'm sorry. But I don't want to mess things up. I don't want to ruin things for us," Noah said.
"Noah, you're not ruining anything," Rachel replied. Noah instinctively turned and wrapped his arms around her. Their angling on the floor made it awkward, but Rachel happily returned his embrace. She buried her face into his neck, holding him as tightly as she could.
"I'm sorry..." Noah said.
"You have nothing to be sorry for," Rachel replied. They held each other for a long time, only breaking when they heard clattering dishes from the main room. Relieved to find that some of Noah's composure was coming back to him, Rachel rubbed his arm and smiled.
"You ready to go?" Rachel asked.
"I think I'm still going to need some time..." Noah replied.
"Of course, we can sit here for as long as you need."
"No, I think I need some time alone," Noah said. The answer made Rachel's heart race, but she did her best not to show it. With a leveled smile, Rachel stood.
"Of course, take all the time you need. I'll be in the living room when you're ready, ok?"
"Ok..." Noah said softly. He didn't look at her when he said it, and Rachel didn't push him any further. It was going to be alright, she knew that. The best thing she could do for Noah was to give him the space he needed.
At least. That's what she wanted to be true. But as she walked to the kitchen, she wondered if any of this was alright. Rachel turned the corner, surprised to find Jack alone, putting dishes away in his modern, white kitchen. He slung a towel over his shoulder and looked at her.
"How's he doing?" Jack asked.
"He's... alright," Rachel said. She peered out into the living room, surprised to find it completely empty. "Where is everyone?" She asked.
"The guys cleared them out, and then I let them know it was probably best if they cleared out too. Considering how everything went down, I figured you and Noah would appreciate it," Jack said. Rachel nodded, walking into the kitchen slowly. As she did, the shock of what happened began to hit her.
"T-that's good," Rachel struggled to keep her composure.
"You alright?" Jack asked. Rachel couldn't hold back the tears, as much as she wanted to. They streamed down her face as she let out a frustrated laugh.
"Fuck, I'm sorry... I'm fine it's just... I feel like I ruined everything."
"Hey, it's alright," Jack said softly. He stepped towards Rachel, opening his arms as he did. Rachel stepped into them, happy to feel his warm and caring embrace. She always knew Jack was a good man, despite what others had said, and this one moment of comfort was exactly what she needed.
"This is so embarrassing," Rachel said with a weak laugh, Jack squeezed her tightly. Rachel's face buried into his chest. She could smell the mixture of alcohol and cologne on this dress shirt.
"There's no need to be embarrassed. Shit happens."
"I'm just... I'm just afraid I'm going to lose him over something stupid," Rachel said. She felt Jack's hand trail up her back.
It felt... good. Her heart began to race, and instinctively, Rachel slowly pulled away from him. As she did, Jack's arms dropped to her hips.
