First Meeting

I have so many thoughts running through my head I can't sleep. I can't begin to tell you how much I crave you. I think about what it will be like when you open your hotel door and I get to see you for the first time. I imagine saying, "Good morning, handsome." Bravery brought me there but the butterflies in my stomach are fluttering around - crashing against the inside of me, begging to be released.

"Good morning, Katie Jo." I can already see your smile. Since you are always very quick on the compliments I'm sure you will say something. But I don't want to hear them. I am too needy. I want everything and all at once. I want your lips on mine, I want to FEEL the story since its morning. I still hope you will read to me before bed that night, but I need to feel absolutely everything. So I stop your string of compliments by placing my finger tips on your lips.

"Thank you for coming to visit me. But shhhh...I want to see you. Feel you. Taste you. We'll talk later, but I need you now. I'm invoking my right to clinginess, neediness now. Please kiss me."

And you do. We are still standing in the doorway and I start to remember what it is like to be kissed. I had forgotten. We take turns exploring each other's mouth. I feel sexy. I feel alive. I never want to stop.

I'm not sure who breaks away first and how we move away from the doorway, but we do. I can't stop touching you. I do remember what its like to be a teenager again. It took awhile, but it's those damn butterflies. And a tightening in the chest. And everything is extra sensitive. I look down and my left hand is holding your right as you lead me a little further into the room. We are at the edge of the bed and you turn around and kiss me again. I wrap my arms around you and your hands find my hair and pull me in deeper.

My nails dig slightly into your back. I try to will them to relax, but I'm having a difficult time thinking. Sometime later, an hour? A minute? A lifetime? A second? I lost the ability of time...you sit on the bed an pull me down with you. I slip. Its awkward. I laugh.

You chuckle softly but our eyes meet and I forgot what I was doing. I can't move and I can't sit still. The moment is perfect. The moment isn't enough. You lay me down on the bed and tell me not to move. You grab your camera so you can capture just this moment. Its perfect. I get shy. You only take one quick picture then you tell me not to move.

My feet capture your attention. I'm wearing the black lace up heels with the cutouts. You slowly untie the one that is framing my heart tattoo. I don't bother to tell you there are zippers on the back. I can't breathe, I can't talk. Words aren't needed. I can feel your body saying everything your lips aren't, and I hope you can hear mine just as well.

You slip off my shoe and tell me I'm killing you with my glittery polish. I tell you that you better not die on me. We have way too much fun planned tonight. I wink and a playful smile spreads across my face. "Doctor, if you don't continue undressing me, I'm taking over."

You laugh at me and tell me I need to be patient. You have absolutely no intention of letting me be in charge yet, nor do you plan on rushing a single thing. Then you continue to undress me at a snails pace. You caress and kiss me all along the way. It's agonizing! I love it. I hate it. I need more. I need only this. I need you naked. Yes. The only thing my brain doesn't issue any conflicting thoughts to is I need you naked. Now. Please?

Please, Doctor. Please let me undress you now. I need to see you. I need to feel you. I need to taste you. You see the need in my eyes. You feel the need in my touch. You reluctantly turn over control - for now.

I follow suit and undress you just as slowly as you undressed me. I'm not sure who is happier, and who is more frustrated. On one hand, I force myself to go slowly. I want to feel and explore every inch. On the other hand every molecule in my body is tense. Energy is crackling through me needing our bodies to mash up in a frenzied joining. Exploring you slowly is torture. It is heaven.

You bring me up to your lips and gently flip me over so you are on top. You've regained control. Sort of. Maybe we are both controlling this. But maybe neither of us is controlling what is happening. It's more instinct. Primal. Each giving. Each taking. We are completely entangled in each other's arms & legs. We are not close enough.

God I need you. I want you. I want it to be fast and hard. I want it to be slow and un-rushed. I want it to be intimate. I want it to be domineering. I want to feel everything and nothing. I want to remember everything. I want to forget everything and just feel. I. Need. You.