SecretExplorer(F41)>> "I do find the concept of glory holes exciting, too bad only gays get any fun from them, though..."
The statement was made in the Eros chatroom a late Wednesday evening in October, where the topic of conversation had taken a turn to (very!) casual sex; SecretExplorer apparently had googled around a bit, found that glory holes were few and far between in Norway to start with - and that the ones she had managed to find mostly were located at gay hotspots.
Norweger(M40)>>"How bad do you want to try one out, then?"
I chucklingly inquired. We'd chatted several times during the last few weeks, and we had found that we weren't living too far away from each other, though we hadn't revealed the exact locations to each other, yet. A fragile friendship was beginning to form between us - we were often online at about the same time, laughed of the same lame jokes, enjoyed each other's company - but the idea of meeting up IRL hadn't formed - not yet, anyway. We were good with being cyber buddies for the time being.
Norweger(M40)>>"After all, it is hardly rocket science, is it? Making a fucking hole in a fucking wall to fucking fuck in some fucking place?"
I didn't have to wait long for a reply.
SecretExplorer(F41)>>"Yeah, right. As if I'd enter the restroom at The Lantern or wherever carrying a bag full of tools..."
General hilarity ensued; SecretExplorer had let it be known time and time again that she was a utterly, certifiably useless in any practical undertaking. Hm. The Lantern? Wasn't that the cafeteria by the marina out west? I yellowpaged it and found that I was right; less than an hour from home. For all intents and purposes next door around these parts.
A private chat window popped up on my screen.
SecretExplorer(F41)>>"I am a bit more curious than I care to let the clientele in the lobby know... Do you... Ahem, were you serious? As in, could I possibly talk you into making one somewhere or the other? I don't think I'd ever work up the nerve to actually MEET someone there, but just seeing one in the wild, knowing the option was there should I want to give it a go..."
Norweger(M40)>>"I meant it as a joke, but it IS quite simple, after all, and should be doable - well, at least if you provide me with some strategic measurements... :)"
SecretExplorer(F41)>>"That would be awesome! But, what do you mean, measurements, you don't need to know the size of my bloody tits to make a hole in a wall???"
Norweger(M40)>>"Much as the thought of your tits please me, what I had in mind was a quite different measure - it would make sense for the hole in the wall to be at approximately the same height over the floor as -ahem- another hole, unless you want to bring a stool or put yourself in an ergonomically less than optimal position to make this work?"
SecretExplorer(F41)>>"Oh. Of course. But, seriously, you'd make me one somewhere nearby???"
Norweger(M40)>>"Sure thing, that should be quickly, easily and discreetly done - just let me know about how high... Well, you know. :)"
She LOL'ed to high heaven and promised that the important numbers would be recorded the next time she'd brought out her favourite bathtub toy - a dildo with a suction base; she'd mount it, try out different heights until she hit -hm- the sweet spot and then bring out the measuring tape. "Well, maybe after I've -hm- endurance tested the placement a little bit. Must be sure it is workable for a while, all in the name of science and ergonomics, y'know."
That being said, she closed the private window and returned to the chitchat in the lobby. I half-heartedly took part, but my thoughts were elsewhere. Making a glory hole. That was a first. With any luck, I played my cards so that I got to enjoy the fruits of my handiwork, too.
Days went by, but then one Friday night a private chat window opened.
SecretExplorer(F41)>>"Try 2'6" above the floor or so. Don't make it too small, though - perhaps 8" across?"
Norweger(M40)>>"2'6" above the floor, 8" across. Sounds doable. Any particular location, then? Or any I should DEFINITELY avoid, for that matter?"
SecretExplorer(F41)>>"I'd probably only go there once if that, so I can travel a bit if needed. Say, somewhere between Eid, Vestnes and Aalesund? Will that do?"
Norweger(M40)>>"Eminently doable. Just give me a week or two to do my thing, and I'll let you know when it is ready?"
SecretExplorer(F41)>>"You pull this one off, you're a bloody hero!"
I most definitely was going to pull this one off. If nothing else, it would feel wonderfully wicked to make the first glory hole within a hundred miles. Well, the first one I'd know of, anyway.
The next few days were spent doing reconnaisance after work - just an euphemism for driving around the area, grab coffee and a snack at just about any cafeteria I found, judging their relative merits - ideally, it should be a place where noone started wondering if one stayed for a little while, but at the same time it wouldn't do if it was too crowded.
In the end I settled on The Lantern, the very place she had mentioned as an example once the subject was broached. Was she living nearby? I shrugged. Didn't matter. This was perfect.
The restroom had three stalls; on the plaster walls separating them were - in just the right height above the floor - a lame poster displaying the rules of engagement with the porcelain facilities. It wasn't hard to stifle a laugh.