If you think having a date and getting serious while one is in a wheelchair, try to imagine having a double wheelchair date. Well I did and this is my story of dating André.
It was 2017. I had worked for years at the tourist information center in my city, behind the desk and as a cashier but in 2016 I got the wheelchair I am now in. I am in a lying position with my legs forward, from the pelvic bend upwards and slightly spread. My body is not completely flat lying, I can still look fairly forward, but straight contact between me and my opposite is always distant. I wasn't able to do cashier or shop work any more and I started guiding at a world war one museum side. There I met André. He was also in a power wheelchair. I had seen him before during a handicaped group day trip and although cute with a handsome face I thought he was a dork, quite childish. He was himself overweight but couldn't help making remarks about me. Not in a vicious way, more like 'look who's talking', pointing out his own weight. Still very annoying.
André's work was at the brochure and souvenir stand. It was hard for him because he was not good at talking or socialising with other people and especially abled people. He didn't hear well, despite a hearing aid and was very shy. When someone would say something he considered harsh or unpleasant he freezed unable to do anything. André however had a very friendly, likeable face and appearance and most of the museum visitors were friendly and patient people.
André recognized me right away on my first day, knowing my name, what I did and many other details he must have heard during that day trip to the Antwerp Harbour. He looked at me a little nervous. I know that look from many handicapped young men, when they see a woman. Towards abled handsome women they look unabashedly, to breasts and crotch laughing and making sexual comments, or unwanted gestures.