I thought after I was done with Silverfox that my oral fixation would go away, or at least be satisfied. I guess it was for a while, but after a few days all I could think about was how I could have been better. I've always been a perfectionist. Now that I knew I could suck a dick, all I could think about getting good at it.
For one, I went down on Claire more often. It was a win-win, after all. She got pleasure, and I figured my jaw and tongue would get stronger.
I had played with toys and dildos in past relationships already, so I decided to get a couple of my own to practice with. I bought two of them: a six-incher and an eight-incher. I started setting them upright on the coffee table as soon as I got home from work. I would watch porn videos and try to mimic what the girls were doing. Pretty soon, I was able to take the six-inch one without much difficulty. The eight-incher, I struggled with. It wasn't just longer; it was thicker.
I picked up a lot of tricks, like how to move my head and tongue, and how to apply suction with my mouth. One thing I kept seeing girls do was, mid-blowjob, take their boobs and wrap it around the cocks, using their pushed-together cleavage like a fleshlight. I felt dumb that I hadn't thought of that on my own. I tried it with my new dildos; I could pretty much envelope the 6-incher, but the 8-incher poked out the top. Still, it seemed like it would be a great maneuver for me.
Eventually, I decided that porn would only get me so far. I took the plunge and paid for instructional videos. Believe it or not, they really helped. They went out of their way to explain that porn blowjobs were all about the visual for the viewer, not necessarily pleasure for the receiver. It was tough to hear that the mid-blowjob boobjob wasn't actually all that great for most guys. I didn't believe it though, I decided I was still going to try it at least once.
I also tried sliding the dildos -- well, one at a time - in me after a practice blowjob session. I had liked the feeling of being penetrated with girlfriends before, but this time I closed my eyes and imagined that it belonged to the man I had sucked off previously. I actually sort of liked the idea of it. I got pleasure from it, obviously, but it also made me realize that, being sexually attracted to girls, I cared way more about their looks. Men, though, I really didn't care what they looked like. I could just appreciate what they were: sex partners. I wouldn't say that I came to the conclusion I was bisexual, but I couldn't deny that I got sexual satisfaction from giving blowjobs, and from my one experience with an actual man. He'd just been so appreciative and grateful; it had made me love giving myself over to him. I'd never felt so wanted before.
Another week went by with me practicing whenever I had time alone. Claire and I had been having sex every day we were together, and it had gotten more intense than it had been before my experience with Silverfox. I wasn't sure if it was because my sex drive was higher, or if maybe it had something to do with the guilt I felt for what I did, but every time we finished and laid beside each other, I would think to myself that I wanted to do it again.
I thought about reaching back out to Silverfox and showing him what I'd learned, but I decided against it for the time being. I wanted to keep my options open, and see if I could make someone else's day this time.
Work had become even more of a blur, but I had plenty of motivation to stay professional. If anybody at the station found out about my encounter, I would be hounded all over the department, and Claire would surely get looped in sooner rather than later. One day was definitely different than the rest, though. It started off slow, with only a few calls before lunch, but it got busy after that. That wasn't all that unusual, but when it started getting dark, we got a call for a vehicle fire with a victim trapped inside. It was definitely the most exciting call of the day.
It was at one of the larger stores in a strip mall. As we rolled up, we saw a fully-engulfed SUV. I hoped they'd already gotten out, because by the looks of it, there was no chance anymore. I masked up, left the fire engine and got to work on putting the fire out. My partner checked for anybody stuck inside, but it turned that he'd been pulled out by a store employee before we'd arrived. By the time the fire was out and it was time to pick up our hose and gear, the sole victim had already been transported to the hospital. I noticed what looked like a store employee talking to what looked like his manager. I told my partner that the victim was lucky that man had been there, since we would have been too late for him.
The employee was a young Asian guy, around 20, a bit on the shorter side, with shaggy hair. He had some smaller oval glasses on and wore a tattered, blackened shirt. I never got the chance to go talk with him or even get close before we had to head out on another call. I decided I could use some new clothes, though, and that I would swing by the next day, after work. I hadn't been shopping in years; I was sure it would be fun.
The hours drifted by after that; the crisp clarity of fire and crisis gave way to the blur. The calendar flipped over to a new day. Finally it was time to be relieved. I drove over to the mall and parked pretty close to where the fire had been. The SUV had been towed away, and the spot had been cleaned a bit. All that remained was a black char mark.
The parking lot only had a few cars since it was morning on a weekday at the mall. Claire would be upset if she knew I went shopping without her, but, looking down at my unflattering clothes, I realized I had been running from my body so much I didn't have any options to stand proud in. Also, I was sure she would like to see me in something cute and new. I just never really had a reason to since I didn't go out much - mainly to the grocery store and the gym.
When I was walking around looking, I picked a few things out that I'd always liked the look of, but had never purchased. I hadn't wanted to attract that kind of attention.. I thought that since I was trying other new things, why not these too?
As I started trying things on, though, I quickly remembered why I didn't really wear 'fashionable' clothes. The crop tops that fit my frame had my tits falling out of the bottom, but I loved how my tight stomach looked. In fact, it was a struggle to find anything that could cover my chest and show some skin without the same thing happening. My thighs and ass had always been a struggle to get into form- fitting clothes. My hourglass figure was impossible to shop for, though I did occasionally have some luck with dresses.
I tried on this lovely white and yellow sundress that had a very low-cut, spaghetti strap neckline that held my breasts snug in the fabric. It still had plenty of room for my tits to get pulled out, though, which I tested by pulling them over the top of the dress and pushing them together. The fabric was somewhat elastic, so it stuck to my curves at my tummy into my hips. It came down mid-thigh, but when I bent over, it rode up to just below my ass. For fun, I shook it a little, and the elastic at my hips pulled the fabric up higher and higher. The more my ass and thighs swayed, the more my dress pulled up, until my ass was fully out in the open with my black thong on display. When I stood back up and fixed it, I thought I looked like a sweet-but-devious country girl. Claire was going to be surprised when she saw it on me.
I liked it so much I wanted to wear it out of the store. Unfortunately, I'd worn a sports bra in, so I had to go braless home. I didn't think it would be too bad, though, since the area still seemed pretty quiet. I tucked my sports bra and clothes away into my purse and left the dressing room. As soon as I stepped out and felt the breeze outside, I began having reservations. I shook my head and told myself that it was too late to back out. I made my way up to the register, thinking to myself that this was the most skin I had shown in a long time - especially cleavage. The woman behind the counter gave me a judgmental look as I pulled the tag off the dress and paid. I would have given more thought to it but, some noises from the back office drew my attention.
From what I could make out of it, it sounded like someone was getting fired - something about how even though it was a good thing they did, they exposed the company to liability, and they couldn't continue employment. I couldn't make out much else, but it sounded like a good guy was having a bad day.. I was finishing checking out when two people stepped out of the office. I recognized one of them. It was that guy who'd pulled the man from the car the night prior. He had on what looked like a freshly-washed version of what he'd had on last night: a light blue polo shirt with khakis. He looked professional, in direct contrast to my new outfit.
They shook hands, and the just-fired man turned to leave. I grabbed my receipt and headed the same way; I was probably about ten feet behind him.
I was in shock. I couldn't believe the company would do something like that to him for doing the right thing. If anything, he deserved a reward. I realized there was something I could do to make both our days better. I picked up the pace; as he stepped out the front door, I caught up to him and tapped him on the shoulder saying, "Excuse me."
I could tell he barely noticed me, which made sense. He'd just been punished for saving for somebody's life. After a moment, though, he did turn around.
"Oh, I'm sorry," he said, still a bit dazed. "I actually don't work here anymore."
