Dad's girl friend wore a ridiculous hat. It was something you would see at the Royal Ascot races, and it was the size of a home satellite dish. This was not something to be worn for a family lunch to celebrate my engagement to Honey.
It was coming into summer, and the venue was where we were considering having the ceremony, but today was about the families meeting each other, and lunch.
Having lost my mum at an early age, my father always seemed to need a partner. Currently, he'd found this English lady.
Honey's parents came with her sister and her new husband. The husband turned out to be a nice guy who'd get screwed, but the others, well the mother is a classy kleptomaniac and the sister a manipulative cow. Neither woman had a patch on the class, poise or beauty of Honey. But more on that in other stories perhaps.
We were all shown to a private room and seated for lunch. I have Honey on one side of me and my Dad on the other. Next to him is his girl friend. Honey's mother and sister were sitting next to each other at the round table
It was a 3 course lunch and sometime during it, Honey's mother started a suppressed laugh. Then Honey and her sister started it too l8ke it was contagious. What the hell were they laughing about!
When I say laughing, I mean giggle to the point of years. Honey's Father told the Mother to stop it. But it got a little worse. I had no idea about it and it just got worse.
Then the penny dropped. It was the ridiculous hat that they were laughing at! It must be. I struggled through this and tried to lead conversation away from the ridiculous hats perhaps. Who wears a hat to lunch anyway?
After the lunch, the men came to me with some cash and I sorted the bill. after a look around, good byes were said, and I couldn't get out of there fast enough. It was an embarrassing disaster.
After putting Honey in our new car and starting off, I asked "Darling, what on earth was that all about?"
Honey said "Her hat was so ridiculous, it was obviously what mum and my sister were laughing about, so I couldn't help it. It was hilarious. I couldn't keep it in any longer. It was killing me. "
I said "I understand that, but it was the first time we've come together and I didn't want that. It was embarrassing. "
She said "I'll make it up to you later. If things get messy, I'll send in the cleaning crew. "