It was another warm evening in Arrecife, Barbara and I were having a drink in the hotel bar before heading out for the night, our usual Bacardi and cokes taken in the shade by the main pool bar. I had phoned Dave earlier, I knew he was working on a big project and didn't want him fretting about me.
"Hiya love," he answered on the second ring, "How's it going?"
"All good, how is work?" I asked.
"Going great ta, just about to open a bottle of wine to celebrate actually. Are you too behaving or misbehaving?" He chuckled.
"A bit of both, you'll have to wait until I get home. I don't want to get you bot and bothered when you are all on your own!" I laughed.
"Oh, shit you've got me guessing now," he laughed. "Whatever you do have fun but be careful."
The pips sounded.
"Love you," I said quickly.
"You too." Dave replied, "Can't wait..." the call terminated.
"You two having fun then?" It was Rob and Ian, the two young men we had spoken to briefly a couple of days ago, fellow residents for the week.
We turned our heads, "Oh hiya," Barbara answered. "Yeah, we are aren't we Jane." "It's been good so far anyway." I added.
"What have you two been up to?" Barbara queried giggling, "Or maybe not, I'm not sure we need to know!" More giggling.
The two young men just laughed. "So where are you heading to?" Rob, the taller of the two asked.
"That gay bar in between the clubs," Barbara volunteered cheerily, "we love it there don't we Jane?" She nudged me. "Oh yes, it ticks the boxes!" I said, maybe a bit too quickly.
Barbara went to get us two another drink, I could hear Rob and Ian talking and I turned a little to listen..."Fucking shame that mate, I know they are older but have you seen the tits on Jane and that Barbara looks fit as well." It was Ian, his voice was deep and no doubt carried further than he thought. Rob replied, "Yeah mate old but gold, let's set off out mate, see what the night brings." They finished their drinks and left. Their voices were northern maybe Cumbrian from what I could recall from holidays up there.
When Barbara returned with the drinks, I told her what I had heard. She laughed, "Fucking hell they have us down as lesbians now what was I thinking of." She laughed, "I'll never get fucked at this rate!"
"That's not what we are here for Barbara, is it?" I said. She put her hand on mine, picked up my hand and kissed it. "No, it isn't and thank you Jane." She had found her husband having sex with their daughter's 17yr old friend. The divorce had been messy and hurtful, I had been there for her, then and now.
"Mind you I wouldn't mind a stiff cock up me sometime soon." She whispered. "You have Dave, what we share is special, but a good hard cock would be nice."
"Are you thinking of those two?" I asked, taking a sip of my drink and looking at her. "Surely they are not interested in us, they will be shagging their way around the young easy prey. They are good looking lads, not hard up enough for us oldies."
"Fuck off we are not old," Barbara replied draining her drink. "Come on let's go party!" she said, getting to her feet.
I left part of my drink; they were cheap enough anyway!
We went from bar to bar, eventually making our way to our favourite one. The door staff knew us now and we went straight in.
Drinks bought and a table found, a karaoke competition was announced. I looked at Barbara, "Fancy a go?"
"Oh yes but what are we going to sing?" She asked.
"Sisters are doing it for themselves?" It jumped into my head.
"Oh shit let's do it." Barbara beamed.
I went to the bar and got us registered, getting two more drinks as well.
Returning to the table Barbara asked "What is our name Jane?"
"It is a daft one but I didn't have much time, Urethra Franklin and Fannie Lennox." I spluttered.
"Love it, love it, love it." Barbara laughed.
After listening to several dire versions of the usual crap we were called on stage as the last act, our names alone drew a gathering clapping of hands and whistles.
We walked on hand in hand, we had checked the lyrics on our phones, the prompt screen blinked...I caught it right on cue.
"Now there was a time"
The crowd got louder with every line.
We started to walk hand in hand off the stage, "Whoa ladies." A voice boomed out from our extravagantly clad host; he swivelled his hips towards us. "Right dearies, you two are obviously the winners!" he raised his arms to the acclaiming crowd, whistles and approving shrieks erupted.
"The prize!" He took his arm from behind his back. He held in his hand a vibrator, it was big, it was black!
"Take it then," he squealed, "and make a speech but keep it fucking short dearies."
I was a bit frozen to be honest, but Barbara didn't let me down!
She seized the vibrator in one hand and held it up triumphantly, "Too right, sisters will be doing it for themselves tonight!" She shouted; she ran back to our table alongside me.
"Do you want to try another bar?" Barbara asked. "I think we have seen the best of this one now."
"Why not, let's have a look anyway." I answered, we finished our drinks. Barbara managed to fit the vibrator into her shoulder bag.
We wandered off down the main street, some nice soul sounds were thumping out into the night air at one bar, "That sounds good," I suggested, "fancy giving it a go?"
"Yeah, why not." Barbara replied cheerily.
With the night air chilling we opted to go inside, we located a table on the outer edge next to a wall, it was pretty crowded.
A waiter soon arrived though and we ordered our usual Bacardi and coke drinks. We gave the waiter a reasonably generous tip when the drinks arrived having sussed that is the way to get prompt service.
I looked at the tables around us, couples or mixed couples on most, on the one towards the inner part of the room were four men, twenties by their appearance. They were obviously English, their accents southern as far as I could tell.
"Cheers Jane," Barbara said raising her drink to mine, we chinked glasses. "Cheers, looks ok in here anyway." I answered.
The mellow tones of Marvin Gaye faded away as the track ended. The DJ in a booth in a corner of the room talked his spiel, introducing the next track. "Ladies and gentlemen...and others, in fact everybody, the wonderful Aretha Franklin and Annie Lennox and Sisters Are Doing It for Themselves."
We just looked at one another and burst into laughter.
"Fuck me it's fate!" Barbara giggled.
"It sure is!" I added.
As the song ended I overheard from the next table, "Fuck me lads, this place is so sad, shite music and a pair of middle-aged old slappers next to us, why don't they play Who Let the fucking Dogs Out!" Barbara and I both looked aghast as he continued to his adoring mates, getting to his feet.
"Look at the fucking state of them, I can smell mutton and it isn't cooked yet." His mates cheered as he continued, "Probably like fucking the top of a wellington boot."
I got to my feet as did Barbara, we were ready to leave rather than put up with this.
"Sit down ladies," It was Rob with Ian at his side, "We just spotted you two and were on our way over to see if you were ok."
He turned to the other table, moving close to the one standing. "Shut up, don't bother drinking up just fuck off!" he said non too quietly. His voice was menacing as if he was used to this sort of stuff.
The standing guy laughed, turning to his mates, "Tough guy eh?" he motioned to them to stand, as they did they each clasped a bottle in their hands!
"Well," he looked at Rob, "there are four of us, you might have bottle already but you'll have more fucking bottle than you want if you don't fuck off...and now!" he hissed.
He barely had the words out of his mouth before his nose exploded in blood, Rob's head had hardly moved he obviously knew what he was doing. Ian was not inactive, as soon as Rob had headbutted the leader his wrist was locked on the bottle holding hand of the nearest of their aggressors. The man screamed and then fell unconscious as Ian's big fist connected with his chin.
The other two lost their bottle, literally. They dropped the bottles, which smashed on the floor, hurled the lightweight table in our direction and ran, the bar staff were heading our way, Rob shouted at us, "Get back to the hotel, go indoors they will have the police looking for us."
We were shocked, we did as Rob said, "Jeez that was awesome," Barbara said as we scurried back to the hotel, heels don't allow much speed!
Dave was a good fighter I has witnessed a few in our early days but these lads were in a different class.
Gaining the security of the hotel, we calmed a little. "I need a drink," I said to Barbara. It was still only eleven o'clock, early for here. "Yeah, me too," she answered. We took a table in a quiet corner of the bar.
About ten minutes later Rob and Ian strolled in, smiling. They bought drinks and headed in our direction, "Our heroes," Barbara said as they arrived at our table, she pulled out a chair for Rob, I felt obliged to do the same for Ian.
"No problem," Rob said, setting his beer down. Ian doing the same in between me and Barbara.
"Those wankers deserved a smacking, the other two would have got one too if they hadn't run." Ian said, his deep voice reminding me of what I had noted when he had spoken earlier.
"The Police are searching everywhere now, they'll trawl the street either side of the bar with a couple of cars in each direction, if you see a blue flashing light we need to not be here." Rob interjected.
"Should be a while though, they have a few places to check." Ian again with his deep voice.
