What a drag! I finally had to appear at the court for a week for jury selection. Thanks to COVID-19 and my age, I had been able to dodge my civic duties several times in the last two years. I was glad to be off the hook for jury duty. Being fully vaccinated and with the pandemic in decline, I no longer could avoid the summons this time around.
I took public transportation to the courthouse, navigated my way through its halls and found myself in a large room with some 50 people already present. I took a front row seat (unlike school, sitting the back does not increase your invisibility), and waited as more potential jurors drifted into the room.
After I settled in a seat in the front row just to the right of the podium, and started working on a crosswords puzzle, a woman walked into the room. She had an elegant, regal air about her. As she passed me by, she gave me the once-over. I returned the favour. She must have liked what she saw. I certainly liked what I saw.
Her hair was silvery almost to the point of being white. Her eyes were blue-gray. She was dressed in a white blouse and pants with vertical stripes in white, orange and blue. As she was already tall and thin, it only had the effect of making her seem taller and thinner. She wore sandals. After all, it was summer in the city. She managed to come across as refined without being fashionable.
I had no idea who she was. When it came to types, I normally favoured the curvaceous and the voluptuous. She was neither. She was an old woman but that was no problem because I was an old man. There are some guys out there who prefer younger woman no matter how old they themselves were. Not me, I was always attracted to women in my own age group. When I was young, I preferred young women. When I was middle-aged, I preferred middle-aged women. Now that I was old, I preferred old women. Why? Because being contemporaries increased the possibility of common understanding and a common world view even though we had otherwise lived entirely separate lives.
But what was the attraction? I was just an average retired guy. Maybe she liked my looks because I was her type. But maybe it was something else. After all, I was attracted to her too even though she wasn't my physical type and I had, as yet, no gauge on her personality.
The only explanation I could come up with were pheromones. Yes, pheromones, a type of hormone that is exuded from both males and females that and has an attractive impact on others, usually of the other gender. To make it plain, our physical types may have been barely relevant and our compatibility as personalities were totally unknown. Therefore the attraction was entirely sexual.
In any case, this thin, yet attractive, creature walked by me and took a seat in the front row several aisles farther away.
Jury selection was supposed to take place at 9:30 a.m. but no court officials showed up. In fact, we waited for an hour and a half when finally a court official appeared. She explained that, by coincidence, no court cases were going to trial this week and therefore we were free to go. We even got a bonus, we would not be called for jury duty for the next three years. If we were, all we had to do was wave our current summons to the court official to prove our exemption.
Normally, I would have just taken off to get away from a duty, especially given that I didn't really want to perform it in the first place. However, if selected I would have done my duty as a juror. This time, I dallied and waited for her. As she approached, I stood up, smiled at her and said, "Well, wasn't that short." It was rhetorical question whose answer was obvious to her and any other who had been summoned.
"Yes, it was," she agreed.
I saw that twinkle in her eye again and took the plunge. "Would you like to go for a coffee?"
"Sure," she said and we headed toward the elevator. I introduced myself to her and she introduced herself as Claire.
Once we were outside, she didn't flinch when I boldly but gently took her arm in mine and led to a nearby cafΓ©. We took a table on the patio and ordered a coffee. I asked for a cinnamon bun and asked her if she would like to eat something too. "My treat." I said.
"A cinnamon bun for me too, please," she replied.
Not being a talkative type, I had to scramble to say something to keep the conversation going. What can you say to a total stranger? So I hemmed and hawed and managed to raise a trivial subject that was enough to kick start a conversation that lasted almost two hours. We talked about everything but avoided talking about our personal relationships or the careers we had before retirement. Clearly she was smart, articulate and well educated.
From her mannerisms and the way she talked, I hazarded a guess that Claire was probably well known in her field and yet nothing about her rang a bell for me. I surmised that her professional circles did not intersect with mine at all. She could have been, for example, a ballet dancer, because she had the figure and grace to be one but I wasn't the least but interested in ballet. She could have been in a medical profession for all knew because my job in the transportation would not have intersected with her world. Nevertheless, I thought I was getting at least some sense of her personality. It was time to put this sense to the test.
"Can I be honest with you?" I asked. Then I confessed, "I don't really know you. So it's hard for me to say what I want to say without fear of offending you."
"Offending me?" she asked.
"I'm a straight-forward kind of guy," I told her. "If I'm diplomatic at all, it's because it's a skill I have learned but my preference is to get straight to the point, especially in a situation like this."
"Oh? That's a strange thing to say," she said. "What are you getting at?"
Now, I was starting to feel really uncomfortable. I second-guessed myself. I wondered if I had misread her. If so, I was on the verge of getting it all wrong. For all knew, she could be some kind of uptight sanctimonious religious nut although the way she had given me the once-over spoke against that possibility. That once-over in the courtroom reminded me that I actually did have some insight about her after all. she found me attractive.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained. The worst that could happen was pissing her off and her walking away, leaving me to pay a bill which I was going to pay anyway. "Okay," I finally said, "Please don't be offended by what I'm about to say even if it sounds offensive. Okay?"
"I can't guarantee you that," Claire said, "but I'll keep an open mind."
"Fair enough," I said.
"You're a very attractive woman," I told her, "and I don't know why because I've just met you." I screwed my courage and, lowering my voice, added, "Don't be offended but I think you're hot."
"It is the height of summer," she observed.
'God, this woman wasn't going to make it easy for me,' I moaned silently.
"I mean...."
"What?" She smiled at me and looked at me coquettishly. She paused for a moment. "Oh, do you mean hot without a temperature?"