My name is Andrea. I will dispense with any long, physical descriptions of myself except to say that I am late thirties, 5'8" tall, of average build with shorter brown hair and that I was always quite a tomboy. You see, I am a lesbian, or at least I still believe I am. Although some may label me bisexual, in light of recent events, until the following account I had only been with women. I have never really thought that much about receiving any attention from a man. For me there is nothing to offer that I couldn't get from a woman, and I must say that I truly love women. Tender, emotional attachments were something that I could only associate with females; it just seems strange, as an example, for me to kiss a guy. Although I have always had a very hyperactive sense of adventure when it came to sex, and an appetite for the forbidden, I always felt, and still feel, completely at ease and secure in my sexuality. This is because I can never remember feeling desire for experiencing anything but women, except for one man and one act.
Eric had always been one of my best friends. We had all but grown up together, and from the time I was quite young I would always spend time over at his house with him and his sister Kathy. She was like my sister and Eric was kind of like a big brother to me. Our close friendship always seemed quite natural and we thought so much alike that he made me wish I were one of the guys.
Perhaps it was just a matter of trust that if was to ever share my secret curiosity with another; it could only have been him. Perhaps it evolved from so much open and carefree talk, with common views, that made me fixate on the thoughts that seemed to be against my very nature. You see, for some time I had wondered what it would be like to give Eric a blowjob. I don't know why this idea interested me, but I think I may know when it started.
It seems so long ago, when I was only 18 or 19, that I remember being over to Eric's house helping his sister Kathy pack for college, when she went down to eat supper. I was invited also, but had already ate and decided to keep working. I had stopped at Eric's door earlier to chat a bit and noticed him reading one of the erotic books he kept in his room. I had asked him what it was and he offered it to me to read, I just shook my head and walked away. He was down eating as well, and as I passed his doorway, I noticed that book on his bed. Curiosity pulled me into his room. That wasn't too big a deal since I often came there to visit Eric as much as Kathy.
I picked up the book and began to leaf through it. I took notice of the favored pages that books tend to more easily open to, due to extra time being spent upon them. This gave a hint as to what Eric had been looking at the most. I was naturally curious in knowing what turned guys on and how it might compare. The spine was well creased on one spot in particular, which I began to read. It was about a man receiving a particularly detailed and involved blowjob. Even though I thought this would be the one thing that would interest me the least, I found myself reading more and more.
So this is what turned Eric on? I had accidentally seen Eric naked a couple of times, while walking around their house, but I had never really thought about what I had seen. I then began to visualize his cock in the account I was reading. It was strange, there was not, and never had been, any physical attraction to him, but I began fixate on his shaft as the powerful sexual symbol that was being utilized in this story. I started to think about what it may be like to perform the act I was reading of. At first I was torn between revulsion and the powerful erotic nature of it. Despite my preferences, fellatio had to be one of the most intense of all sexual pleasures, for both parties. Perhaps it could even be more intense, in a pure sexual way, than the more tender act of orally pleasing a woman. I found that sexual power overcoming me, and my hand moved down my front to between my legs as I began rub the denim that was noticeably warmer.
The animal lust described on those pages had me oblivious to my surroundings when the door flew back and Eric said, "Aha! I caught you!" I was like a deer in headlights as I immediately tossed down the book. To cover my embarrassment asked if he enjoyed reading that smut!
"From the looks of it, not as much as you do!" he quickly shot back.
"Some of it is interesting enough to get to you," I grudgingly acknowledged. " I know, but probably the same things get to you that would get to me though," he picked. Although I had not declared my preference yet, Eric always seemed to know from the beginning. I let him think this was the case, and that I was imagining having the women in the book, but the fact was, and I didn't know why, I had wanted to do exactly what I had read to him!
The seed was planted, and over the years it slowly grew in the back of my mind. I found it very curious that it was such an isolated single desire, and it never caused me to doubt who I was. It also never caused me to doubt my friendship with Eric. You see, it was because of, rather than in spite of, the fact that he was the last male I could ever imagine kissing or projecting onto any of the things that I reserve for women. I was not attracted to Eric in any way, but was, instead, attracted to trying something completely different. In simpler terms, I was not attracted to him, but I was attracted to his cock. I assumed he knew nothing of my secret thoughts, and I didn't know how I could ever tell him about them. I always had to be careful not to let my eyes give me away when he was wearing a loose pair of shorts and I could see glimpses of pink skin through the openings. It just fed my curiosity all the more and had me stealing looks when I could.
For 20 years that seed grew while sex became fairly routine and the new thrills faded, I became more determined to find more excitement. My desire to explore this unknown ground came to the surface when I learned that Eric had a very good job offer with a company in Texas and was going to be moving away. It was a bit of a shock to me, and I knew I would have to adjust to a big change. He had been perhaps my best friend for as long as I could remember, and now he was moving away. For the first time in our lives we wouldn't be just a few minutes drive from each other.
Four days before he was to leave I stopped in to help him box things up, but mainly just to spend together some of the short time left. We had been moving things around and packing most of the evening when we decided to take a break. Eric reclined back onto the couch and I collapsed into the chair opposite him. We discussed many things and some about his trip. He was concerned about his new job and starting over in a strange place.
He talked, but I only heard some of what he said since my mind was filled with the intense struggle of whether I should ask him or not. I must have gone to the brink about five times or so, only to back down and continue with other conversation. Each time I felt a strange relief that I had not taken the chance, only to be followed by desperation at the thought of the one opportunity to finally satisfy this awful curiosity slipping away. Finally something inside me said that I had to try regardless, or the wasted opportunity would forever torment me. This time when I spoke the words actually came forth. "Since you will be leaving for good there is one thing I would like to bring up," I had spoke and now I was committed. The world took on a strange surreal quality and everything seemed to go in slow motion as it sunk in that I was going to do this after all.
He looked at me to let me know I had his undivided attention. I started as tactfully as I could, " Do you remember back when you were dating that girl named Danielle?" He continued to look at me, waiting for me to finish. "I keep thinking about the night you asked me if I would like to have sex with her."
"Uh huh," he acknowledged, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I pressed forward, "I know that she left before anything became of it, but I keep thinking of how hard that must have been to ask me that out of the blue. You had to have been worried that I would have reacted negatively and called you a pervert or something. I mean it must have took some nerve to ask, didn't it?"
"It was pretty hard to do," he answered. " You have no idea how long it took me to work up the guts to ask you that!"
" That is what I figured. So if you could trust me enough to ask me that, then I thought that I could take a chance and ask you something that until now I hadn't dared to ask," I then paused.
