I was tired as hell after completing the night shift and just wanted to make it home to my bed. It was about three in the morning when I pulled into the car port of my apartment complex. I sat there for a few minutes dozing in my car before I was jolted out of the beginnings of a deep sleep by a departing jeep Cherokee. Every bone in my body was aching as I gathered up my lunch box half falling out of the car to the pavement. I managed to gather myself worrying that someone happening upon me would mistake me for some sort of alcoholic. I lived on the first floor just above the basement parking garage but still struggled to make it up the four stone steps that led to the narrow exterior corridor to my apartment.
"What the-?!!" I unlocked my front door finding it blocked with some semi-heavy item which turned out to be a big, pull-on suitcase. I figured my wife had brought some new luggage and was too lazy to put it in the closet behind the door. Linda was somewhat of a slob, but I put up with her because she appealed to some of my baser instincts; namely we got along famously between the sheets. We'd been married for six months and it was long enough that I knew she was gonna turn into Mrs. Beaver as the house gradually became a cluttered, junky mess.
My living room had an open floor plan that combined it with the kitchen in the form of a glorified kitchenette which meant I could look out over the adjacent living room. I wearily put my lunch box on the counter noticing the television was playing, but muted. The coffee table was littered in multiple boxes of Chinese takeout along with various bottles of beer and soda. There was some sort of weird, crazy looking anime playing on my fifty-inch flat screen.
"I'm getting tired of this shit." The irritation that came with the realization that I was going to have to clean up after my wife had me fully awake as I rounded the open counter top.
"Huh, oh?"
My wife was lying face down on the couch with a thick comforter covering her upper half. Her lower body lay exposed illuminated by the television light. She was wearing a blue thong that made her big pale cheeks stand out. Linda was obviously trying to entice me as we hadn't done it in a few months. The thong was horizontally striped in different shades of blue, the cut making her ass look fuller than usual.
Truth be told, my wife was pretty blah in the looks the department from her shoulder length blonde hair and plain face, standard medium sized breasts with her wide hips and somewhat flabby butt that I enjoyed pounding from the back. Linda was pretty good about sleeping with me, but she was likewise mostly an average lay at best. But tonight, looking down at her butt in those enticing thong panties was waking the proverbial dragon. I'd always been into hips, thighs and legs initially drawn to her because she had those attributes. The duration of our relationship was mostly harmonious drama free, so we ended up going to city hall to tie the knot six months prior. Linda was pretty good about letting me tap that forty six inch butt whenever I wanted. Tonight she was looking way too good to pass up. We hadn't done it in a while, and it looked like she'd gained a little weight in the right place as far as I was concerned. Her pear shaped butt looked magnificent as I let my hand slide across both cheeks from the far end to the right, luscious oval shaped globe giving it a hearty squeeze.
"What-the-fuck?" The comforter fell away as she rose supporting herself on her elbows staring at my face.
This woman wasn't my wife; I recognized the harsh face and short ragged bob of dirty blonde hair on her best friend, Kristy McKenzie. My palm was still planted flat in the middle of her right ass cheek for a few seconds as she glared sleepily at me like I'd walked in on her in the bathroom of something.
"You finished?"
"Uhm, sorry; I thought you were Linda." I withdrew my hand feeling like an idiot as she scratched her hair lazily.
"Yeah, sure." She went back to sleep without another word, still leaving the comforter up over her butt. It rode up further revealing her small waist. I stared for a few moments before withdrawing remembering from a gathering at a backyard party thrown by a mutual acquaintance of my wife's. From what I understood, Kristy was this troubled girl from the wrong side of the tracks known to be somewhat of a quote-unquote "Wigger" in that people said she behaved like a black girl or something. I stumbled down the short corridor to my bedroom which was adjacent to the bathroom.
Linda was in our large, queen sized bed fast asleep wearing one of my plain white t-shirts and a pair of decidedly boring, pink granny panties. Even if I couldn't see her face, the loud snoring was a dead giveaway. I stripped down to my underwear considering waking Linda up to ask her why Kristy McKenzie was on my couch. It was my understanding their decade and a half long friendship was rocky at best, downright toxic at worst. Ultimately I decided to wait trusting there was a good enough reason as I slid between the sheets quickly dropping off into a deep sleep.
[DARKNESS]
I awoke with a start shielding my eyes from the sunlight filtering in through my venetian blinds checking my phone. There was a message from Linda telling me Kristy would be our house guest for a couple of days after getting "put out" of her apartment after a disagreement with a roommate. It was ambiguous, but I knew better than to call Linda while she was at work. She worked a crap job in medical billing which helped us jointly pay the bills but was positively draconian in nature. My thoughts shifted to Kristy, sleeping on my couch as I got up cracking my bones as I stretched. I needed to make amends, but first, I had to drain the lizard. I stepped out into the hall pushing the bathroom door open.
"EX-CUSE ME; WHAT THE FUCK?!!" Kristy was sitting hunched over on the toilet.
"Sorry." I quickly backed away realizing the door hit her in the knees when I pushed it open. Kristy stared at me angrily for a few seconds, slamming the door in my face. The lingering ring in my ears from the sudden loudness remained as I stumbled into the kitchenette area going into my fridge.
"Hey man, what's up with all the pervy shit; Linda ain't putting out or something?" Kristy appeared in the living room, visibly annoyed with me. She was wearing this cutoff grey, cotton football jersey that left her well defined abs exposed having slipped on a pair of boy shorts.
"Sorry about that, it was an accident-and last night, too." I apologized awkwardly trying not to look at her body. Kristy was standing at the end of the counter with her hands on her hips, glaring angrily.
"That wasn't no accident, man."
"Yes, it was; I thought you were Linda last night, and I just wanted to use the bathroom this morning."
"You ain't think I was no fucking Linda."
"Yes, Kristy; I thought you were my wife last night on the couch. I didn't know you were here when I came in this morning." She scoffed as I noticed her medium sized breasts poking against he fabric of the cutoff jersey.
"Stop lying man; you just helped yourself because I don't look like no fucking Linda. What on me, looks like her sloppy ass?" Kristy raised her hands doing turning slowly, almost proudly displaying her body. Her prominent teardrop shaped butt hung low from the boy shorts.
"Sloppy, that's cute."
