As soon as I stepped through the entrance, I made a beeline for the ladies room. I had been in and out of the heat all day, trying to find a house for a couple that had no idea what they wanted... or even if they wanted... and I desperately needed a little time to freshen up... try to mask the odor (smell) of perspiration (sweat) emanating from my body. My deodorant had broken down hours ago. I dabbed a little perfume in strategic places, vainly attempted to smooth the wrinkles out of my skirt, checked for runs, ran a brush through my hair, put on a little lipstick, took a deep breath and headed out to the gallery. I probably looked and smelled like a French whore who had been turning tricks every 30 minutes for the last twelve hours but it couldn’t be helped. I wasn’t dressed quite properly for this kind of affair, but I didn’t have time to go home and change. I had made a commitment to attend this exhibit over a month ago and it would be easier to put in even a token appearance than have to answer questions concerning my absence.
Just as I had taken the first sip of champagne, snatched from a roving waiter, I heard, "Hey, Mutt."
I turned and saw my best friend Agnes, alone in a corner, motioning me over.
"Hi, Jeff," I said as I approached.
We had been best friends from the first grade, 24 years ago. In high school we were tagged with the nicknames, Mutt and Jeff, due to the difference in our heights. Agnes is barely 5’5" and I am 5’10". An odd pairing, I’ll admit, but we were virtually inseparable until we each married. Agnes was still happily married with 2 kids and in the eighth month of pregnancy again while my short venture into the much less than blissful state of matrimony had ended more than 8 years before.
"Oh, Lorna, I am so glad you could make it."
"Well, I did promise, but I would rather be soaking in my bathtub sucking on a cold beer right now... or something else."
"Aw, the sacrifices we have to make for the advancement of the arts," She said with a wink, "The real reason I am so glad you are here is there is someone I want you to meet."
"Agnes! Please don’t tell me you are matchmaking again. You know it is a waste of everybody’s time and energy".
"Your love life needs all the help it can get, but this is the last time, I promise."
"My love life is exactly the way I want it... nonexistent, and if my memory serves me right, you made the same promise after that clown from Dallas."
"How was I supposed to know he was looking for a mother. Everyone’s entitled to an occasional mistake."
"But yours aren’t occasional... they’re continuous."
"Come on, I‘ve got the real thing for you this time. " She said as she grabbed me by the arm and herded me into another room.
Across the room I immediately noticed a tall, deeply tanned man in conversation with Agnes’ husband. He was dressed in gray slacks, open necked knit shirt, blue blazer and expensive appearing cowboy boots. "Probably a drug store cowboy" I thought. It was easy to see the wide shoulders, broad chest, narrow hips and long legs. He had a broad face with a wide mouth, high, prominent cheekbones and a nose that appeared to have been broken, at least once. He was not at all handsome but very masculine... masculine enough to cause my heart rate to increase a little.
Stopping Agnes, I whispered, "Is that your latest discovery talking to Gary?"
"Yes, it is," She replied with a mischievous grin.
"He’d better not be some Neanderthal just in from the sticks."
"What do you care if he is or not. Don’t you see the bulge in his left trouser leg?"
"No," I lied. It was hard for me to keep my eyes off of it, "And that’s the last thing you should be looking at considering your present, and all too frequent, condition."
"Well, a girl can dream can’t she. I’ll bet you a hundred dollars that that thing between his legs is bigger than your pet dildo," She giggled.
"You can save your money. I’m not the least bit interested in finding out," Lying for the second time.
I grabbed another glass of liquid courage and followed Agnes. As we approached, I forced my eyes to his face, still thinking the object that was creating a sensation in my body that I had never felt before. It took me a couple of seconds to recognize what it was... lust. Oh, I had experienced lust before, but not the pure unadulterated animal lust that was currently captivating my mind and body. Occasionally, I would run across a man who could lift his eyes above my breasts while conversing that I found interesting enough to take to my bed, a total of 4 in the last 8 years, the last one over a year before. But none of them had come anywhere close to creating the current stirring in my loins.
"Lorna, I would like you to meet John Taylor. John, this is my best friend in the whole wide world, Lorna Dunne."
As his giant work roughened hand swallowed mine, I looked up and was mesmerized by the deepest, darkest, sexiest eyes I had ever seen. Even in three inch heels, he was a at least 5" taller than me. His height combined with his size actually made me feel petite.
"Glad to meet you. Lorna Dunne... that’s an unusual name," He said with a slightly crooked smile.
"Yes," I replied as I broke eye contact long enough to inhale the glass of champagne and grab another one from the waiter. Every nerve in my body was in full alarm "My father loves cookies and has a warped sense of humor. "
"I’m a cookie lover myself," He replied with a widening grin, the innuendo obvious.
"I’m sure Agnes has told you my life’s story," I said, glancing quickly in her direction, "She has been trying to fix me up with men of various types over the last eight years and since I knew nothing of your existence until a couple of minutes ago, I would like to know up front which type best describes you... closet homosexual, mama’s boy, God’s gift to women, married or in search of a meal ticket?"
"Well," John replied laughing, "I’m afraid I’m not as exotic as any you have mentioned. I’m just a poor cowboy with a ranch that the bank lets me call my own and a few head of scrawny cattle."
"My God, I am in trouble," I thought, "Even his laugh is sexy. "
