Ken and Leanne had met in 1971 in school. They were attracted to each other, no doubt about that, but Leanne was already engaged and Ken had a steady girl friend so, as a matter of social mandate, rules are rules after all, they just smiled and talked and silently recognized the bond they had.
Did you ever think about the "one that got away?" Did you ever wonder how life would have turned out had you pursued that person, instead of this one? It's not a full-blown regret because you don't really know if the other person would have responded but, still, it's a tiny pebble in your mental shoe. You can shake it out of the way, but you can't dump it out. It pops to the top of your mind, in a daydream, when you don't expect it. For Ken and for Leanne, each was the other's nagging seed of curiosity, the long-term "I wonder what..." It's like an itch that comes up from time to time, gets casual attention, and then hibernates again but is never truly scratched to rest.
Then, before you know it, thirty years pass. Careers are pursued, kids are raised, cities are visited, tummies grow and shrink, hair falls out and what's left changes color, money is compiled, and waists expand. All in all, satisfactory lives are led and it all happens in the blink of an eye. Yes, Ken, you actually are 54 years old, struggling to lose weight and your opinion is really sought by people you respect. Holy smokes, I'm old!
Then, one day, Leanne sent Ken an email. "Are you the same Ken who attended Control Data Institute in 1971? I have one of your books and I'm intent on returning all of the books I've borrowed." It was a nice note, carefully written, friendly. Ken read it and if there had been an EKG monitoring his heart and an EEG attached to his brain both of them would have signaled, "TILT!" Ken was transported instantly back 30 years, he could hear her voice, see her smile. He could list all the things that he was attracted to then. Her casual hair, her sparse but precise make up, her clear intelligence, her philosophy that suggested that she would hurt no one, hold no one as enemy – all of these were a sweet, clear picture in Ken's mind in an instant. Leanne flashed into his brain, fully formed, comely, attractive, just as she was thirty years ago. It was a wave of realization; it was an epiphany.
Leanne had no real desire to return the book. She knew that the book was no issue to Ken and really didn't care about it at all. Her marriage, sometimes rocky, had settled into tolerability. Her youngest had just graduated from High School. She was an enormously bright person and her style of thought led her to introspection, to an examination of her life. And that led her to Ken. "I'll write him about this book," she thought. "It'll be fun to see how he responds."
"Okay," Ken thought, "I'll write back, confessing my identity but telling her I'm more interested in her than in the book. We'll see." And so he did.
For the next three weeks, Leanne and Ken kept up a lively, almost daily, correspondence. Sometimes they'd meet online in a chat environment and have a typed, live conversation.
Over the net they chatted about millions of things. They shared their views about semi-successful marriages and a person's obligations to adulthood. Ken called it "obligations to manhood," saying that a man accepts responsibility for his life and the lives of his family and, to a lesser degree, the lives of his employees. They both took responsibility seriously. That's why they stayed in marital situations that were less than ideal. It wasn't only the fear of being on their own, it was also the impossibility doing something for themselves at the expense of hurting other people. It was just too high a price to pay, no matter how much relief or fun was offered. This is a thought process that comes from maturity and it is as frustrating as it is satisfying.
Then, one morning, on the net, things got out of hand. Both Ken and Leanne are conservative people, neither given to any but the most reserved behavior. Ken would NEVER talk about sex to someone he hardly knew -- it just wasn't in him. He was quick to blush. Leanne was the same, a woman with a position in the community, respected and demure. But in this early morning conversation, and for the first time for either of them, they produced an imaginary van, walked out to it, and step by step, faster and hotter than ever before, Ken took Leanne's clothes off and made love to her with her enthusiastic participation. It was the first time at cyber sex for both.
Ken was shocked and delighted! Leanne was shocked and embarrassed, but wet and horny at the same time. Leanne used her vibrator to finish her orgasm before she left for work and Ken went into the bathroom and masturbated, eyes closed, seeing Leanne beneath him. What a surprise! What a delight!
