It was a fine Saturday afternoon and I was in a foul mood. No reason for it. I'd just woken up that morning feeling as though I wanted to kick the cat and for some reason my mood hadn't improved.
Maybe if I'd had something to do my mood might have improved, but I didn't. I didn't want to go out and I didn't want to stay home. The only reason I did stay home was that I was likely to dong some idiot for the crime of being an idiot. Perfectly reasonable thing to do in my opinion, but cops don't look at that way. They think you donging someone puts you in the idiot category.
So I stayed and home, sullen and morose. I almost smiled when the doorbell rang. A victim I could snarl at. Maybe someone who wants me to change power company. Perhaps a politician to whom I could explain everything that the politicians were doing wrong. I love explaining things to politicians. They have to stand and take it because they want your vote. Jehovah Witnesses were good, too. You can get them started, become distracted, and have then start again from scratch. It's amazing how long you can torment those people.
It was a young lady at the door. Eighteen, nineteen at the most. Quite an attractive young thing wearing yoga-pants and a form fitting top and that was quite a form that the top was fitting. It took me a few moments to recognise her. She was Miranda, the daughter of some people who live just down the road. I can't stand her parents.
I just stood there, glowering at her, which seemed to make her somewhat nervous. Seeing I didn't speak she finally had to.
"Ah, good afternoon, Mr Stafford," she mumbled. "Um, I'm looking for some work. Do you happen to have any odd jobs that I could do?"
"Do I look helpless?" I snarled. "Too old and feeble to do my own work?"
"Ah, no, sir," she said quickly. "Sorry, sir. I won't bother you again."
She was almost cringing as she backed up, all servile good manners. If she'd had any guts she should have snapped back at me.
"Hold it," I said as she started to turn tail and run.
She paused, all set to bolt for dear life.
I looked her over. She really did have a nice little figure.
"Tell you what," I said with an evil smile. "Fifty bucks to come inside and have me spank your bottom."
I expected her to bolt at that stage. Instead she stood there, looking shocked, her face going red and then pale. I thought I saw an edge of temper showing.
"You have got to be kidding?" she said.
"Why? I'm in the mood to spank someone and you're right here. You might have been sent here for just that reason."
"Do you seriously think I'd let you spank me?" she demanded.
"For fifty bucks? Highly likely," I said.
"You're crazy," she decided.
"And you're still standing there which shows that you're thinking about it," I pointed out.
Not only thinking about it but getting slightly excited at the idea. Her nipples had peaked, although I doubt she had noticed.
"Only because I was so shocked I couldn't believe my ears," she retorted.
"Well, to shock you a little more, the spanking will be on your bare bottom. You'll have to peel of those yogi bear pants you're wearing. Won't that be interesting?"
"Yoga pants. They're called yoga pants, not Yogi Bear."
"It'll be your bottom that will be bare," I agreed. "Not the pants."
"And even if I did agree to be spanked why would I take of my clothes? You'd probably try to rape me. I know your type."
"Really? Been spanked often have you? You'd have to take off your pants because it wouldn't be a real adult spanking if you didn't. It'd only be a child's smack on the bottom. As for rape, I wouldn't bother unless you asked me to. Of course, if you decide to seduce me you'll find me a pushover."
"I have no intention of seducing you," she snapped.
"Then there's no problem, is there," I said, opening the door wider and indicating she should come in.
She looked from me to the open door and back to me.
"What on earth makes you think I'm going to come in?" she wanted to know.
"Because you're curious," I said. "You're wondering what it will be like to be spanked. Forget your yoga pants. You're wondering what it will be like to take off your panties in front of me, knowing you'll be half naked and I'll be looking at you."
It was interesting watching her face. She wanted to deny what I'd said but she'd been thinking about it. I think the aura of disbelief I projected swung the decision in my favour. She wanted to show that she wasn't scared. Head high she marched past.
"Just remember, I'm only agreeing to a spanking. That's it," she insisted.
"Certainly," I agreed. "Just a spanking and only a mild one at that."
She looked at me suspiciously.
