He was her friend. That was all. He had been since they were 9, which was what made the fact that Jess found herself lusting after him all the more disturbing. What had changed? Had he suddenly, overnight, become gorgeous? No. It had been a gradual process. The skinny, nerdy boy she'd climbed trees and skinned knees with had gradually (almost without her noticing) been morphed from childish geek into manly chic. Think Jensen Ackles from Supernatural and you'd be along the right lines. His shoulders were much broader than she remembered; he had developed muscles out of nowhere and, somewhere along the line, had started to look like, well, a man. How was she only just noticing this? It was as though a switch had been flicked in her brain. He had been languishing in the 'geeky but loveable friend' box for so many years that her psyche had, very effectively she now realised, dragged its heels when it came to shifting him over into the 'possibles' box.
With her epiphany came a new awkwardness. She had always been so comfortable with Jake, but now she died a little inside if he turned up unannounced and she had no makeup and baggy tracksuit bottoms on. This paranoia was particularly stupid, she recognised, in light of the multiple heinous crimes against desirability she had committed in his presence in the past, with the time that she vomited carroty chunks over his new jacket after drinking more of a bottle of vodka than was wise being a particular favourite.
"Jess? Come back to me -- where'd you go?" Jake waved a hand inches from her nose, and Jess's 'how-weird-and-scary-is-it-that-I-fancy-my-best-friend-in-Joey-from-Dawson's-Creek fashion' reverie was broken.
"Hmm?" Very conscious that she'd been caught out, Jess tried to look lively. "Sorry -- brain slipped out of gear for a sec there -- what did I miss?"
"Oh not much, really, just me declaring my undying love for you," Jake replied with mock anguish. "Don't feel bad or anything..."
"Just the usual then -- good." Jess smiled, then felt pathetic for being so pleased by a stupid throwaway comment that wouldn't have meant anything to her before she turned into a psychotic friend-stalker.
"Anyway," said Jake in a mock-serious tone, "now that you're back from your little visit to Johnny-Depp-all-oiled-up-and-ready-to-go-land, or wherever it was your pervy little mind took you, can we get to work?"
Jess grinned, pleased to exchange her musings on Jake for the picture of an oiled up Johnny Depp, and looked down at her copy of Romeo and Juliet.
They were to play the lead roles in their university stage society's production of Shakespeare's tragedy. Originally, Jake had auditioned for one of the lesser roles, wanting to be involved without having to devote too much time to learning lines. Unfortunately for Jake, though, the original Romeo had dropped out, and he'd been roped into taking his place. As he was so behind, and as he and Jess were such good friends, they had come into the college theatre out of hours to rehearse their scenes. She sat with her legs dangling off the stage in the cavernous auditorium, while Jake was sprawled out beside her, flicking through his script. He grinned mischievously as he questioned: "Shall we go from the first scene we're both in? Or just skip to the scene with the hot and heavy tongue action, because we know that's what we both really want?"
For a split second, Jess thought she'd been rumbled, and vaguely wondered whether the cause of death on her autopsy report would read 'accute embarrassment leading to desire for floor to open up followed shortly thereafter by cardiac arrest.' Her moment of panic left as soon as it arrived, though, as she realised that he was joking, and that her dirty secret was still safe. She decided that the best way to show that she wasn't lusting after him, and was on board with the joke, was to play along with it. They were always kidding around like this together, so she knew Jake wouldn't be shocked as she responded by throwing her script aside, saying, "Yeah baby I thought you'd never ask," and pouncing on him, her legs straddling his torso as she threw her whole body into her supposed joke. "Get off me you nutter! I knew you wanted me! I just knew it!" Jake shouted, laughing and pretending that her weight was crushing him, but making no move to push her off.
"Chicken," said Jess with a grin, preparing to get up. "I knew you were all talk. You don't have it in you to actually deliver..."
"Oh really?" Jake replied, catching her hand in his before she could get to her feet. "I bet you chicken out before I do." With that, he gently touched the side of her face, and fixed his gaze on her eyes, tilting his head as though he was going to kiss her. He raised an eyebrow and grinned cheekily, but didn't stop. Jess, thrown wholly off-guard by Jake's reaction, tried to hide the fact that her pulse was racing, and that the anticipation had her tingling all over.
Maintaining the eye contact, she casually replied, "Oh yeah? Well I'm not going to back down -- you know how much I hate losing." Gradually moving closer, looking directly into his eyes, she felt a charge of excitement that she knew wasn't one-sided. Maintaining the electric eye-contact, and in agonising slow motion, they moved closer and closer to one another in their game of chicken, until their lips were practically touching.