I'm a big guy, six foot three inches, 220 pounds, blond hair and a ruddy complexion. My Dad was a lumberjack, spent his entire life, up to now, in the lumber harvesting business. Norwegian background. I worked lumbering starting in junior high school, through summer breaks in college. Lots of hard work. I was raised in a very small community. less than a thousand people. I was also raised in a fairly fundamental protestant religion, attending the only church in town.
This story is really about my adapting my basic religious beliefs to the real world. In my early years, I knew as a fact that people had sex only after marriage. God made it enjoyable, to encourage reproduction and the continuation of the species. But it was for marriage only and anything else was sinful. I knew there were strumpets but they were evil, sinful, There was even a girl in my small school that got pregnant and she and her family left town and I never heard of her again.
So, I carried this belief into college. Adjusting to living amidst a much larger number of people than I was used to was difficult. Living in a dorm full of guys took a lot of adapting. The class work was never a problem, I was used to working hard, studying hard. Girls were a definite distraction. There were a lot of extremely attractive girls around and I wasn't used to that. For some reason, they mostly seemed to be very nice to me, to like me I guess.
My first big lesson about sex happened about six months into college. Four of us guys went to a bar. A big bar. There was recorded music, girls, people dancing. I found it very easy to down beer, lots of beer. Then a very attractive girl asked me to dance. I had never danced, in fact thought it was something bad. Good people didn't dance. I told her I couldn't dance but a combination of her and the beer got me out onto the dance floor. Then this girl was almost climbing on me. She had her arms around me and pressed up tight against me. I could feel the shape of her breasts, her stomach, her hips, as they pressed against me. I was extremely embarrassed because I got a hard-on. A huge hard-on. As it developed this girl rubbed against it. It had to be on purpose, I realized. She started calling me Studley. I never learned her name. And even though I told her my name wasn't Studley, it was Robert, she called me Studley several times.
Then she said we should stop dancing and she led me off the floor. She stopped at a table and picked up a couple paper napkins and then led me into a side room, a dark room. It was only a few feet from a lot of people but nobody else was in there. Nothing but tables and chairs, all the lights off. Dark, just light coming in from the other room. She sat me down on a chair and sat on my lap, facing me. Her legs were on either side of me. She kissed me. I had never kissed a girl and I had no idea what to do, so I did nothing. It didn't stop her. She reached down between us, raising her self some with her legs, and unzipped my pants and reached in and grabbed my cock. She pulled it out into the open and sort of moaned or made a small noise and told me I was very big. Using her other hand she apparently pushed her panties aside as I think back, although at the time I was sort of in a daze, not realizing at all what was going on. She then raised herself again some and moved a little and started sitting back down. I could feel my cock pushing its way through some sort of dense, damp, semi-solid of some sort. Whatever it was fit around me so tight it pulled my foreskin back a lot, almost hurting but somehow feeling very good at the same time.
She's telling me that I feel so good inside her, filling her up, and then she's sort of bouncing on me and I can feel what I now realize is her insides massaging my cock. Massaging it all over, moving on it. I should have just stood up and pulled her away, I realize looking back but I didn't. It was all so surprising. And, it all felt very good. I knew what it was to cum. I knew it was a sin but I had jerked off before. The girl started making moaning noises in my ear and her insides seemed to ripple on my cock, squeeze it even tighter and let go and squeeze again, over and over, and that made me cum. Cum inside her. She told me how great I was and took the paper napkins she brought and put them against herself where my cock had been in her, pulled her pants back in place, and got off me. She grabbed my hand and pulled me back to a standing position and told me I needed to zip up. So I push my cock back in and zip and we go back into the other room again.
By then I knew what we had done. I had learned the anatomy of people and wasn't stupid, except in the ways of the world. I really looked at her. She was actually pretty. Maybe not the most beautiful I had ever seen but attractive. And she was grinning, she was happy, she liked what we had just done. But I realized she was a strumpet. She had probably been sent by the devil to tempt me and she had succeeded. I left. I still don't know her name. But I realized I was no longer a virgin, I could never present myself to a prospective wife as a virgin. I was permanently harmed.
I told my room mate back at the dorm what happened. He wanted to know who the girl was so he could go find her but I had no idea. I didn't even know if she went to the college or not. I told him how what had happened was so wrong as far as my beliefs were. He didn't laugh but looking back I think he almost did. He told me that every day millions of unmarried people were having sex. Girls take a pill that lets them accept male semen without getting pregnant. For some people, it's an extremely enjoyable pastime. Getting naked and using each other's bodies is fun. If I don't believe that, I don't need to do it but all those people aren't doomed to Hell as far as he was concerned. He asked me if I had liked it and I had to admit that I did. It felt very good. Did I really believe that some how I was now less than I was before. I did feel that way, that it had h armed me some how.
He never convinced me, my beliefs were too strong, but I did realize that lots of people were having sex and seemed very normal about it. Just because they were different than me didn't mean they were evil, they just had different beliefs, like different religions have. I also couldn't help but notice how attractive so many girls were and I did wonder if they were having sex with someone and I would regularly get erections that embarrassed me.
There was a girl in my class, Elaine, that was very nice. She was easy to talk to, laughed a lot and we got along fine. She wore a lot of loose clothes. Never dressed as if she was trying to tempt me or anyone. I got along with her to the point we would often have soft drinks or snacks at the college Union. One late afternoon we were at the Union and it started raining really hard. She mentioned about how she had to get a half dozen blocks to her apartment and the heavy rain would soak her. I had planned ahead and had an umbrella so I agreed to walk her home, us sharing the umbrella, then I could come back on my own. So we started along and everything was fine. We were talking and laughing and not getting too wet, although it's never perfect under an umbrella. We could see her apartment building, it was less than a block now. We also could see that the rain had washed a lot of dirt, mud, across the sidewalk just ahead of us. There was too much traffic to go out in the street so we decided to try and walk though the mud. It didn't look that deep or anything.
