When the plane landed in Bangkok, Rob had no idea how hot and humid it was going to be. He knew Bangkok was close to the equator and he knew it was going to be hot, but the humidity was a total surprise.
He unfurled himself from his seat at 'the back of the bus,' as economy was called by his work colleagues and, grabbing his hand luggage, made his way to the front of the aircraft.
As he stepped out onto the jetty a waft of warm moist air met him, but this was simply a precursor to what it was going to be like outside in the not so fresh air.
Immigration passed, luggage collected, he made his way to the taxi rank. It was as he left the air conditioned safety of the airport terminal building that the full reality of Bangkok's humidity hit him. He started to perspire furiously in the few short yards to a taxi.
Climbing in, he handed the driver a piece of paper with the address of his hotel on it and they set off. The traffic was another surprise, cars everywhere, and small motorbikes carrying a whole family, filled the spaces between. It seemed as if everyone had to use their horn at the same time, the noise was deafening.
Rob delighted in his new surroundings, and when he had paid his taxi at the front door of his hotel, the driver handed him a card.
"You first time Bangkok?" He said, "you go this club. Very pretty girls. Very nice girls. You go. Very good show."
Not wishing to appear rude, he took the card and shoved it into his pocket. The porter had already collected his bag from the boot and guided him to reception.
Finally arriving at his room, he tipped the porter, turned the air con up to full, and took stock of his surroundings. It was more of a suite than a room. The lounge area had a giant TV, a comfortable sofa, a rather expensive mini bar, and electric curtains! The bedroom area was just a sumptuous with the biggest bed he'd ever seen and there was a huge marble bathroom with mirrors all round.
Rob discarded his clothes and dived into the shower. Having cooled off he lay on the bed naked and let the air con cool him off further. After a short doze he awoke feeling rather chilly, so he pulled on some casual clothes and grabbed the hotel information book.
After reading all the usual stuff he was surprised to see that the hotel had a sauna, by the pool on the roof garden. It even offered massages.
Rob's mind began to race back to those heady days when he had explored the UK massage parlour scene. Surely not in a hotel of this standing? His doubts were lessoned by the note at the foot of the page.
"For that ultimate luxury, book a massage in your own room." Followed by a phone number. Really? Surely there can only be one reason to have a massage in your room rather than at the sauna? While his mind was musing on erotic possibilities, he remembered the card from the taxi driver.
Pulling it from the pocket of his discarded trousers, he noticed lots of highly suggestive pictures of scantily clad girls and the legend, "Best Show in Bangkok." This might be a good place to start his erotic appraisal of the city.
The tuk-tuk driver tried to persuade him to go somewhere else.
"You like Thai girls?" He enquired. Rob admitted that he found Thai girls very pretty, so the tuk tuk driver continued. "I know best place. Very pretty Thai girls. Very good massage." But Rob held his ground. He wanted to experience some of Bangkok's legendary night life before he sampled the delights of a Thai massage, with all that that might entail.
Having been dropped at his destination by his latest Thai friend, who had also given him a card, he entered the dimly lit establishment. He was guided to an empty, cinema style chair, against the back wall by a rather delicious looking young lady in high heels, a very short dress and breasts that were doing their very best to escape the confines of her top, in spite of being rather small.
"My name is Kanda," she informed him, "what you liee to drink." She returned shortly with his beer and a glass of something for herself. Having charged Rob, a not unreasonable price, for both drinks she sat next to him and put her hand on his thigh and started to rub it gently.
"You watch show now." She almost commanded, "very sexy ladies."
The show was more unusual than erotic, in fact the most erotic thing was Kanda stroking his upper thigh in a very suggestive manner. The surprise was yet to come as balloons were handed out to each person on the back row.
"You hold here." She said as the girl on the dance floor sat stark naked on a revolving office chair. She lifted a sort of blow pipe from the table next to her and inserted it into her vagina.
