Saying Goodbye 5

In the farthest corner of a the parking lot, which was equally as conspicuous as it was unnoticeable to a casual passer-by, is where I sat in my car, waiting. It had been a few months and she, Cora, had moved on. To be honest i'm not sure what made me agree to meet her at this brewpub on this particular evening but here I sat. I purposely showed up early and knew by doing so I would subject myself to seemingly endless minute after seemingly endless minute. I chain smoked cigarettes with my driver's side window cracked a few inches. Inhaling deeply and casually blowing the smoke to my left. There were countless confusing and unanswerable questions about my intentions in accepting her invitation to meet this evening. I didn't particularly like her any longer. I suppose i'm just a nostalgic person chasing the past but all these second thoughts are getting to me. Maybe I'll drive off. Maybe I'll attend and purposefully be a dick to even up the imbalance of power between the two of us since she cheated on me. I'm not sure what the right thing to do is but I do know that the beautiful early june, sunny weather of this afternoon has made way to grey skies and light precipitation.

"Is that her car? Ugh, crap, it is." I thought to myself as she pulled in to the parking lot.

With all the torture of the past few minutes now being forced into one final, last chance decision I surprisingly didn't falter or hesitate. I drove from the far side of the parking lot over towards the entrance to the brewpub, put my car in park and opened the door. I dragged long, hard and deliberately on my cigarette as I exited my shitbox automobile and flicked the butt about 20 feet to my left towards a sewer drain. I exhaled and confidently walked over to her car.

She slowly pushed the door to her new car open and in that moment my bravado, my cocksure attitude, my artificially inflated chest, deflated. Those second thoughts were now bubbling back to the surface and churning into third and fourth thoughts with infinite branches spiking off in every which direction. It was like lightning in my brain and I wanted to puke or pass out. She gave a simple greeting which I didn't make note of and I mumbled something in return. We walked inside the brewpub.

I cannot remember much but I do know that we kept things pleasant. The possibility I left open for myself to be a dick and settle the score didn't seem much like the optimal plan any longer. We drank craft brew after craft brew, sampling the fruits of the local brewmaster's labor and things go in and out of clarity. I wasn't so much drunk or nervous but some concoction of the two. Suddenly, the friendly barkeep had to break the news to the two of us that this would be last call. He did offer to let us order another round and continue to sit as the staff cleaned up around us which we promptly took him up on. He brought over two more drinks and we placed our coasters on top and excused ourselves for cigarettes out back.

She had quit smoking. It seemed to me as if she had quit many things, myself included in that list, obviously. I couldn't for the life of me understand why but I guess I didn't mind. I was having a decent enough time tonight and the past has passed. I had told her that night that I forgave her. The truth is that I didn't but in the moment I felt like I did. Whether I did or didn't, didn't have any bearing in the real world anyway because she had moved on despite my blessing (or lack thereof) and I too had to move on. We lingered out back by the dumpster for a long while. I think neither of us had any idea how to end this evening because we weren't friends and the last few hours of chit-chat on the barstools wasn't real. The air hung thick in the way that only humid, sea air could in June on the east coast. She looked me in the eyes and then looked away. I looked left, dragged hard on my now smothering ember one last time and flicked it away.

I began to turn my head back to the right and suggest that we go back inside and prolong this awkward goodbye with the last of our beer but I felt a pressure at my waist. Cora was fidgeting with my belt and I froze. I didn't know, or care what her intentions were at this point, I just didn't want to fuck this up. She slowly got past my belt, button and zipper then pulled my pants and boxer briefs down just below my ass. I was at full attention in seconds and the brain lightning I had been experiencing earlier returned. She made a few slow passes of my shaft with delicate motions. She spit on her palm and rubbed it flatly against the head of my dick in the same way one would roll dough into a ball on a counter top.

After a few seconds she pulled her hand away and my dick hung in the breeze for a second. Her evaporating spit made for a cool sensation right at my most sensitive spot. I nervously looked around and took in my surroundings. There was a dumpster to my right, gravel and mulch to my left, some poorly landscaped evergreen bushes and trees blocking all view from left to center and vast, empty parking spots beyond the dumpster. I reached into my hoodie pocket and grabbed my cigarettes. I lit one as her hands returned to stroking me. I didn't offer her a smoke. I didn't want to. It felt good not to be polite to her. Plus, from my angle, her mouth was busy enough. My chest was once again inflating and not just with breath or smoke. My bravado was returning.

She played with my balls, rubbing them with both hands, squeezing them pulling them. I was enamored and engrossed with this string of moments. She may have been as well but that was of no importance to me at that point in time. She took my balls into her mouth and I could feel her tongue exploring the back side of my sack. No bit left unlicked. I imagine after a humid day like today the taste probably reminder her of a day at the beach. Salty. Sweaty. I laughed internally at the thought and blew my smoke down at her face intentionally out of disrespect.

She released my balls, perhaps out of protest of the smoke, perhaps coincidentally, and that same cooling sensation of her spit evaporating now blanketed my balls and the feeling was wonderful. A bit of precum gathered at the tip of my dick and she licked up the underside of my cock to the tip and got herself another salty sensation, I'm sure. She spit all over my dick and her hand. She began slowly jerking me off with a tight grip and gradually increasing her suction as she worked her wet lips back and forth over my crown. It felt great and I leaned back on the stucko wall to really enjoy this moment. I looked up towards the sky and only saw clouds and the overhead lights of the parking lot. She took me deep into her throat. The slimy mucus making for great lube as she worked her hand over my shaft and used her other hand to play with my balls. I dragged my cigarette again. I closed my eyes as I began to feel the inevitable conclusion growing inside me, slowly.

Here is where normally, when we were together, I would reposition her for sex. I reached down the top of her low cut shirt and freed her tits instead, unsure of where I wanted this all to go. I kneaded her left tit with my left hand for a few seconds and tweaked her nipple aggressively. She reacted by letting a quick moan escape with her exasperated exhalation around my dick which was nearly choking her and it felt amazing. She was damn good at deep throating. That surely was one thing I definitely have been missing. I placed my hand on the back of her head and guided my dick slowly past her teeth, then her tongue, then I came to rest dick against tonsils. I gave a quick, deliberate thrust of my hips sending my dick down her gullet.

While she was used to deep throating, this forceful, surprise intrusion caused her to gag and moan even more. The vibrations felt unbelievable throughout my entire lower half, all the way down my legs to my toes. I leaned back let her recuperate for a second. I thought about turning her around, ripping her jeans down to below her ass and fucking her wildly. I thought then about doing the same thing but going for her puckered asshole. I thought about both of those options and countless others as she replaced her hands on my dick and began to stroke. She looked up at me. Her expression was lustful and i'm sure she was wet as hell. I knew she wanted me to fuck her. The thought was tempting.

My cigarette had gone out in my hand so I flicked it off to my left as my right hand dug deep into my pocket to retrieve another. I lit it, took a deep drag and looked off towards the sky. When I let it out of my lungs I looked down at her and I knew right then and there that no sex, no anal, nothing pleasurable for her would come to fruition. While stroking and looking up at me my right hand grazed past her left ear and cupped the back of her head guiding my dick back into her mouth. The thought of being so dismissive of her wants or desires really turned me on and I could feel that the thoughts of sex, fucking her in the ass and being a selfish prick were causing my body to inch closer and closer to orgasm.

I looked her in the eyes and have no idea what the expression on my face must have been but she looked right back at me. I left my cigarette to dangle from my lips as I had one hand guiding her head to and fro as the other grabbed at her tits which had been flopped out of her shirt as if St. Pauli girl undid the tie at the top of her traditional beer wench outfit and folded it down. Two beautiful tits just dangling in the summer breeze. I dragged on my cigarette and she moaned, deep throated and played with my balls as long as I dragged. I dragged it again. She reciprocally moaned. This was a game so I played. I was now completely in charge of this situation. In charge of her moans which were in turn, my pleasure.

I played with her. Alternating my timing and her matching with moans. I started to get incredibly light headed but the nicotine was coursing through me and I felt amazing. My toes danced in my sneakers, my legs straightened out I gasped and held my breath. I pulled back from her mouth and leaned back with a clearly audible thud of my dead weight onto the stucko wall. She gasped for air, looked me in the eyes and stroked me, rubbing her thumb under the tip of my dick, still slick with her saliva and mucus. My cum flew from my dick onto her face. Her saliva, mucus and some of my cum sloppily sputtered through the air as her stroking never faltered, landing all over her tits. I finally exhaled, feeling dizzy and relieved.

She wiped the cum from her face with her bare palm and fingers. She licked it clean, like a whore, which no longer really turned me on as much as the action would have about thirty seconds prior. She wiped the spit, saliva, cum mixture from her chest onto and around each one of her tits and my deflating dick twitched, grasping for another go at it but sadly, I was spent. I pulled myself together, as did she. I pivoted to my right and walked out to my car. I figured talking or anything else would've been too much of a blunder. It was a perfect goodbye. I guess I did even the score after all.

Cora

As I was turning into the parking lot of the brewpub I saw Jack's car at the far end of the parking lot. Having spent years alongside him, I figured this was probably born out of some sort of necessity to mentally keep his options open as far as actually meeting with me. To be perfectly blunt, I hadn't assumed that he would actually meet me here tonight but he did agree and I do wish that he would at least stay and have a drink. There is so much that I intend to tell him about why I did what I did and i'm really excited that I've gained the opportunity to do so. I could see out of my rearview mirror that he was indeed driving over towards me. Thankfully.

I opened my door as nonchalantly as I could and step out into the warm evening air. I pivoted awkwardly to my left to avoid hitting the car in the spot next to me and I saw that he had already come to greet me. We exchanged pleasantries and I feel so much comfort in his company that I grew to be instantly calm.

We grabbed two seats at the bar as a table would probably be too formal, forcing us into a lot of face to face interaction. I was more than ok to sit and chat with him for awhile even if we both went minutes without actually making eye contact, talking into our beers. I imagine that the scene from the bartender's perspective of the two of us would strike him as either a first date or exactly what it was, a post breakup meeting. I didn't think much more about the bartender's perspective as Jack and I spoke about life, love and future endeavors that either of us intended to partake in, respectively. I really was surprised at how well we were able to speak and how much it meant to me despite the fact that we both weaved deftly around the uncomfortable topics of hashing out the details of what had happened between us. I also failed to make mention of the new love in my life but it didn't much matter, it seemed. Then it happened. He told me he forgave me. I was flushed with happiness. It meant so much to me that he could be so mature.

I could have stayed perched on those barstools all night. The bartender, of course, had to come and ruin the moment for me. The bar would be closing but we could have another and close our tabs. They would leave us be until they were done cleaning everything else. Jack offered me a cigarette and I informed him that I had quit not long after our union came to an end. I did, however, accept one thinking that it couldn't hurt to put on those old pair of shoes and walk around a bit. After all, what's one cigarette anyway?

I wasn't enjoying my cigarette very much and as Jack finished his I could feel how awkward it was going to get as the night was drawing to a close. The inevitable last drink would be so agonizing to sit through and maybe it was the tipsiness and maybe it was the fact that I had already mentally started wandering around in these old pair of shoes but I went for his belt.

I started being a little tease, just rubbing the head of his dick in my palm as I knew he used to like. I took his balls into my mouth and tongued them the best that I could manage. The taste was bittersweet. Don't get me wrong, it was salty and sweaty but it was musty and steeped in nostalgia. I took him into my mouth and remembered each curve of the head. I started going at him with genuine hunger for his bits and pieces. After all that I had done I thought I would do something just for him, especially since he was mature enough to forgive me for it all.

He reached down the front of my shirt, which was as far as I was going to let this go. A little blowjob and titty play I could get away with mentally as "not cheating" but anything beyond that and I would have to tell my new boyfriend. As long as I derived no pleasure myself, it was all innocent fun. This logic is what had gotten me into trouble in the first place when I had cheated on Jack, which started this whole mess. Jack must have been loving this because he accidentally exhaled his cigarette smoke in my face. Normally I would be pissed off but accidents to happen, and why ruin the moment?

Jack smoked too much, I thought to myself as I deep throated him as far as I could. Jack really did have a big dick. It had no bend in it or any obviously pulsating, thick, blue veins. It was a pleasure to service this particular tool. I could feel his hands playing with my nipple and my tit. I loved that we were pretty well hidden behind the building but anyone could walk or drive by at the right angle and see me sucking off Jack with my tits bouncing about. I was really hoping that nobody was watching me on my knees, or ogling my tits. I really wondered why I had done all that I had done in the first place, even though I knew I was better off now.

He grabbed my head and slowly put his dick into my mouth. He stopped where my tongue ended. Before I knew it he thrust deep into me as if he were trying to fuck my stomach and I gagged. I nearly vomited and I let out a deep moan as he withdrew from my throat. I could tell he loved it. Through teary eyes I looked up at him and made eye contact. As he drew from his smoke I moaned as long as he inhaled. This was a bit similar to a game I had learned from my new boyfriend but Jack didn't have to know that. I would take my new boyfriend's cock into my mouth and start blowing him. I would then put my finger in his mouth and anything he would do to my finger I would mimic in my mouth onto his dick. In this case I just used the cigarette in place of my finger and inferred what I could.

I locked eyes with Jack a few times in the next moments which I cannot place an estimated amount of time on. He looked right back at me. Through our eye contact, which had been relatively lack luster in total minutes this evening, I said goodbye to Jack. I had been with Jack a long time and blew him on countless occasions. I could tell he was close. He backed out of my mouth and like any good girl I kept up the pace, tugging at his dick. I rubbed my thumb purposefully underneath the head of his dick smearing around my saliva in little circles and then he came. Spurt after spurt hit my face and from my tits up I was covered in slime from any number of bodily orifices. He exhaled. I cleaned off my face with my fingers and just like I used to, tasted his salty cum. I rubbed my chest and massaged the wetness into my breasts and around my nipples then pulled my shirt and bra back over the girls.

Jack didn't motion to go back inside or even look me in the eyes. He just walked off, which was perfect for me. I'm glad I could give him something as a parting gift. He did forgive me and he didn't make it awkward by trying to fuck me. I walked back inside to use the bathroom and found that the beers had been cleared from where we had been sitting. There would be no more between us from here on out. I'm just glad we could come to a place of peace.