This one I threw together fast. Upon reviewing, decided I didn't want to bother cleaning it up too much. It's just a ridiculous, little tale.
*
My name is Linda Fields. I am perhaps the youngest, most successful therapist in the nation specializing in sexual dysfunction. A blog I had started six years after college caught fire, and I offered free advice online. That led to guest spots on podcasts and talk shows, a book deal and growing list of clients who could afford higher and higher fees. My time was always booked.
I'd recently finished up with a couple coming out of infidelity and had the space to take on a new client. My secretary, Brenda, had an appointment scheduled the very day I told her an opening was available.
"His name is Richard Banks. He'll be here at 2."
Did he discuss the nature of his problem?" I asked.
"He said he was too embarrassed to explain over the phone, and that maybe you wouldn't believe him if he tried. This is why i chose him. Sounds like your kind of challenge."
"We'll see," I said. Personally, I liked having a bit more information, but once Mr. Banks showed up, I immediately changed my mind. Richard Banks was an exceptionally attractive 28 year old man, already a successful entrepreneur, owning a web development company. He had the body of Henry Cavill and the face to match, although it was certainly his own. He had a strong, yet narrow jaw, piercing blue eyes.
Once he settled into the chair across from my desk, I asked him about the nature of his problem.
"Brenda said you refused to explain over the phone," I stated. "I promise you, if you want real help, you need to drop your modesty to address whatever problem it is you have."
"The problem is I am afraid to date women. I've already hurt three in my life and I need advice where to go from here."
"Mr. Banks. Emotional fallout is natural in a break-up. You may have hurt those women, but if it was best to end the relationship, then it is acceptable collateral damage."
"No, no, no, nothing like that. I mean hurt. Physically hurt."
"Mr. Banks, are you telling me you have an anger issue. I don't really specialize in that."
"No, no, please, let me explain." He paused for some time before continuing. "Dr. Fields, I have a very large penis. Three women have agreed to have sex with me and all three got hurt. I tore one so bad she was in the hospital for two days."
This sounded far-fetched to me, but I stayed quiet, allowing him to continue.
"It's difficult to even get it in, but it's the uh... the other thing, too. It's terribly embarrassing."
"As I said, complete candor and honesty, Mr. Banks. It's for your own good." I tried to catch a glimpse of his cock while speaking to him, without making it obvious, but the manner in which he was sitting prevented a clear view.
"By the time I finish, they are crying and instead of sympathy for them... the thing I've done every time... oh, this is so embarrassing... Anyway, I came each time. You have to understand, when I masturbate I do cum a lot. I discovered watching porn now and then, that I have an unusually high sperm count. I blame my balls. They are sized to match the rest."
I said nothing. I was beginning to think this was huge prank, actually.
"But when I am with a woman, and mind you it's only been three times in my life... well, I cum a lot more than usual. I think because I am so excited. I can barely help myself. I wish I could find a girl to allow me time to get better at it and last longer, and be more gentle, but every time, the ones that have been willing, wouldn't go a second time with me."
I sat up in my chair. "I have to say, Mr. Banks, this all sounds far-fetched to me, but we can quickly deduce if you're lying... if this is some big prank."
