I watched, fascinated, as the nine ball rolled slowly across the green felt and settled with a satisfying 'plop' into the corner pocket. Another ass-kicking was on its way. I picked up my cue and strode majestically to the end of the table while the balls were being racked. With all the grace of a bull in a China shop, I stroked into the cue ball. It cracked off the one ball and balls flew everywhere.......except in the pocket.
My opponent grinned, stepped to the table and ran all the balls......again. I watched another hundred dollar bill (mine) disappear into a bra (hers).
"Well, chump, would you like to try again?" she laughed.
"Of course I would! I just need another beer to improve my eye," I sneered.
I received another suds from the chuckling bartender and watched as she broke the rack. Three balls went in on the break. She smiled sweetly at me, polished them off and graciously accepted another piece of my fast dwindling nest egg.
"Had enough yet?" she smiled.
"Hell no! I just need another beer to settle me down," I muttered.
The bartender was openly laughing at me as I grabbed another brewski and headed to the table. Once again the crack of the rack split the smoky barroom air. Once again, nine balls stayed firmly planted upon the green.
She planted her feet in one spot and gunned the rack down. Giggling, she accepted the last of my expendable funds.
"Thanks, easy," she remarked as she sat down at the bar to wait for the next idiot.
Did I mention the ass-kicking? Well, it should be obvious by now that I was the kickee, not the kicker. Sweet Sue had once again wiped out my savings. What I really needed was another beer. Adding insult to injury, she bought it for me. I wondered briefly if I could claim her as a dependent on my income tax. After all, like any other woman, she got all my money, every week.
"Say Sue, can I claim you on my taxes?" I weakly mumbled.
"No way! You're more like a student. You're not giving me anything. You're paying for my services as an instructor, although I must say, you are a slow learner."
As I stumbled to the door she opened it for me, grabbed my elbow and whispered, "You know, you're not half bad looking. If you could stay sober, we might have some fun together." I staggered across the parking lot and saddled up my nifty, thrifty Honda fifty. As I wove my way home it suddenly dawned on me that sweet Sue had more or less promised me some goodies if I could get off the sauce. I fumbled with my keys and finally got the door unlocked. I strode majestically into my apartment and collapsed on the couch. The world went away.
Dawns early light leaking through my open front door temporarily blinded me. I stumbled over and shut the door, then ran down the hall as an overwhelming desire to take a piss got to me. At least I managed to hit the toilet a little more than fifty per cent of the time. Shaking it off, I walked with my dick hanging out to my bedroom, stripped my clothes off and crashed onto the mattress.
I was up at the crack of noon and took my shower. I brushed my tongue for fifteen minutes in a vain attempt to get the beer out of it. Half a bottle of mouthwash didn't do it either. I pulled on a pair of boxers and ate a grapefruit while watching college football. About half way through the game I suddenly remembered that Sue had promised me some pussy. I also remembered that I was a slow study and would have to take it easy. I wondered if I could stay sober long enough to corner her. I knew it would be worth it. The question was, why would she pay any attention to me? I'm not ugly but I'm no movie star either. I'm strong as an ox, but so are most of the other men around the docks.
Sue was a small girl with blonde hair and blue eyes. She had a really sweet smile and was well liked by everyone who met her. She also made a lot of money off of suckers like me. See, she was a pool shark. She had been on the pro tour for a while but gave it up so she could stay in her home town by the sea. When she wasn't relieving us chumps of our spare change, she was either practicing or fishing.
If it has occurred to you to ask, '"Would we ever learn?" The answer is NO! We just knew we couldn't continue to be beaten by a girl! It was unheard of. It also happened with distressing regularity.
I pondered Sue's apparent lust for me all week and came up with no answers. I'm just not very remarkable. I stayed sober all week too. It was kind of strange waking up in the morning and actually remembering what happened the previous night. Friday finally rolled around. I collected my pay and hustled over to the bar. I was freshly bathed, teeth brushed, hair combed and even clean clothes.
Sue noticed immediately. She sidled up to me and said in a low voice, "After I make my payday, I'll come talk to you. Don't get drunk or the deal is off."
I ordered a seven up with a twist of lime. I thought the bartender was going to faint.
"Did you say seven up?" he asked incredulously.
"Yup, I've got bigger fish to fry tonight," I bragged.
I got a real education as I watched Sue fleece the suckers as she had me on so many occasions. She never missed. If she got to the table, get your money ready 'cause you won't have it long.
She cleaned out four chumps in two hours. Then she said to me, "Meet me outside."
I gulped the rest of my latest seven up and left the bar, waiting for her on the curb. Ten minutes later she walked out.
"Let's go for a little walk," she said.
I was ready to do just about anything she told me to do. We walked down the waterfront and out onto the village pier. When we reached the end, I stopped.
"Okay, why have you chosen me? There must be dozens of guys after you. Why me?"
"Well, you are big and strong, so you can defend me. You never whine when I wax your ass on the pool table. You're fairly good looking, but not so much that you'll be any trouble. I saw you taking a leak against the wall one night. You have a major size dick. And last, but not least, you've got a nice, big boat."
"Okay, so I'm not a cry-baby and I've got a big dick and a big boat. Why now?"
