I probably shouldn't have done this, but I've been browsing through my Haitian boyfriend Steve Salomon's diary. Makes for truly fascinating reading, let me tell you. I just couldn't resist peering into my lover's mind and see what he truly thinks. If that makes me a nosy bitch, so be it. My name is Yasmin Hussein, and I'm a young black Muslim woman of Somali descent living in the City of Ottawa, Ontario. I'm a student at Algonquin College, studying accounting. Steve and I live together on Donald Street in Vanier, in the east end of Ottawa. Life is alright for us these days.
After reading the first few pages, I was smiling because they were full of praise from Steve. My sexy Haitian boo lavished me with praise, calling me his "Somali goddess" and his "big-booty sweetheart". I was smiling from ear to ear until I began to read about Steve's criticisms of me. Phrases like "Yasmin takes too long in the shower" and "she needs to stop stealing my razors" littered the next pages, and I was nonplussed. What the fuck? Miffed, I continued to read, and grew angrier and more perplexed by the minute.
By the time I got to the passage where Steve Salomon, in his typical Haitian arrogance, made unflattering remarks about the way I smelled after coming home from the local gym without showering, I was boiling mad. I went to class and then came home. I was still simmering over what I read in Steve's journal. I love this man something fierce. I call Steve my Haitian prince in my most private moments. Is that what he truly thinks of me?
It always galls me, to hear men talk about women's imperfections. As if they're perfect. Ha! If I were to dish on Steve Salomon, I could tell you about his farting jokes, his nasty habit of pissing in the toilet and not flushing it right away, and the fact that he likes to hum when he has to go the washroom in the middle of the night. Dude always wakes me up with his nightly antics, and not in a good way.
I'm not a perfect woman, and I never claimed to be. I'm almost six feet tall, curvy, wide-hipped and big-bottomed, with golden brown skin, long curly black hair and dark eyes. I'm a chubby brown woman in a world that worships skinny white girls. Oh, and I also wear the Hijab half the time. It's not easy to be me. I gave Steve the best of me. To hear that he's dissatisfied angers me like you would not believe. When Steve dragged his ass home after a long day at Carleton University, he found me sitting in the living room, watching Swim Fan, one of my favorite movies. Hello babe, Steve hollered, and leaned over to kiss me on the lips.
You got some nerve, I said, shaking my head and staring at Steve through angry eyes. My favorite big and tall Haitian looked at me pensively. What's wrong sweetie? Steve asked. I pursed my full lips, and flashed him a smile a shark would recognize. Steve took a step back, and inside, I rejoiced. It's good to know I can still scare him from time to time. Steve grabbed the chair opposite me, never taking his eyes off of me, and then asked me what was up.