"Okay, I've got the dog's food, now I need some stupid tampons and some more castile soap" I muttered to myself. It was a morning of small errands before work so I could free up my weekend for more fun things. As I walked out of Target with keys in hand, I heard someone calling my name. I turned around and saw it was his wife, waving like a mad woman. I stopped and waited for her approach.
"How are you girlie?" she exclaimed while hugging me.
"Well, just getting some things checked off my list before work. What are you doing out?"
"I had to do a bunch of running around for the kids so I decided to make a day of it and take off before the long weekend. Are you guys still coming to the ranch?
"Oh yeah, that's kind of why I'm getting all of this dumb stuff out the way too- so we can just relax and enjoy y'alls company!"
"Awesome, well I don't want to hold you up too long so I'm gonna get going."
We hugged goodbye and as I walked away, she yelled out, "Hey! Your best bud says you still owe him a beer so don't forget it!"
I half turned around and waved back while still heading towards my car. "Great," I thought, "another stop."
It had been a little over a month since we got together and a week since I saw him last. There was a bet on the table- of which I lost- so now I owed him this super hard to find beer. Luckily, I was able to make a few quick calls and found it at the small family run liquor store the next town over. I placed a 6-pack on hold for pick-up the following day since I had to get to the office. Since we had begun our engagements, it was always a little weird hanging out together. We both managed to keep our composure, although at times it was hard. Last weekend we all went to the lake together which of course meant a bikini. Don't get me wrong, his wife kept herself pretty together and all, but I had the advantage of never having children so everything was just a bit tighter with way less effort. Plus I was younger than she, so I could still get away no makeup and still looked great. Anyhoo, there was a friendly wager placed on the local team's game, of which I said they'd lose. They lost most of their games so without knowing much, I bet they would lose. Little did I know, their "star" was out" and the back-up was actually doing well. Needless to state the obvious, I had to pay up. I didn't mind, of course, because we were still friends and all. But since then, I had been a little on edge since something out of the ordinary did occur.
While dancing the night away- just a wee bit drunk- I started twerking to some ratchet song. Everyone was enjoying it partly because of their own buzz and other partly because, well, I'm good at it. So as I was putting my back into it, I got on all fours and backed my thang up when he came up behind me, grabbed my hips, and started to grind on me. Everyone was laughing but I was actually scared that someone would see something else. So I sprang to my feet and started to shimmy away so as not to arouse too much suspicion when he laid a nice, firm smack on my ass. I immediately tensed up, quickly scanned both wives' faces, whom weren't even looking at us anymore, and made a swift exit to the bathroom. I was mortified, unsure, scared, and suddenly sober. I stayed for a moment, pacing back and forth, pondering the consequences. When I finally came out of the restroom, there he was, leaning against the opposite wall, still drunk. He smiled at me, pointing at my face drunkenly, laughed, then went into the restroom. I was stunned. When I got back, I sat between the wives, brazenly, but also to see if anything was up. I pretended to still be drunk and began to giggle as I markedly joined in on whatever they were talking about. Soon after, we all packed up and left. The next few days, I was on pins and needles to see if it would come up again, but it never did. For an event that probably lasted only 30 seconds strangely took up residence in my mind for hours and days. I guessed we dodged that bullet- thanks tequila! It was weird because he usually doesn't drink much when we hang out. He likes his beer, but generally likes to keep his head on straight. Whatever it was, it definitely got out of control just a bit. I hoped it wouldn't happen again because luck does run out you know.
The Ranch is a real Texas ranch, which people rent out for some hours or days to hang out, go camping, hiking, bonfire, horseback ride, and a bunch of other country stuff while relaxing in the hills. The location was known for beautiful sunsets and wondrous star gazing. I looked forward to spending time with my wife in such a beautiful setting with cool folks, but I was anxious too. Since it was going to be a weekend without kids, it was supposed to be extra adult themed. It was Memorial Day weekend and everyone was ready to play. There were four other couples joining us, so I'd hope to take refuge in their conversations and musings to keep me distracted.
We drove up Friday afternoon with our main buds and two of the other couples. The others arrived later that night for dinner. After a 90 minute drive, we finally arrived- and it was just as breathtaking as we were told it would be. The hills rolled gently one after another, with dry and wet creek beds nestled between them and wide open spaces all around. It was so idyllic! I couldn't wait to see our room. As it turned out, there was a super huge main house with 8 bedrooms to choose from and a smaller pool house out back complete with a bar, big screen TV, deep couch seating all around, and two bathrooms with saunas. There were no televisions in the main house on purpose, but there was an amazing back porch that overlooked the valley, fields, and one of the larger wet creek beds.
Since we were first there, we got our pick of rooms and chose the one closest to the back porch to avoid having 'neighbors' on both sides. Also, I wanted to wake up to that view! As we got settled in and unpacked a bit, I snuggled up a bit with wifey and stared into the vista together. Suddenly we heard a loud clanking noise that sounded like those metal triangles that people ring to signify dinner. And it was. And of course his wife would be the one to find it.
"I just wanted to let y'all know that dinner will be in two hours, the rest of the crew should be here in the next hour, and all the fridges and pantries are stocked so feel free to indulge a bit before dinner. Or go fuck each other and come to dinner with a smile!" she said.
And this was why I loved her. She was so wacky and cool. Sometimes she could be a bit much, but only sometimes. It being a hot Texas day, we opted to head to the pool area for some quick salvation. We grabbed some lemonade from the fridge and sat on the edge of the pool with our feet in the water. Soon we were joined by another couple and began to chit chat about work and some other mundane things to get to know each other. After a half hour or so, I began to feel nauseous so I retired to the pool house with the television and guess who was there on the main couch.
"Where's wacko?"
"Getting ready for dinner" he replied, without looking up.
I laid with my head on the armrest and feet in his lap. He finally broke his gaze and looked over at me.
"Are you ok?" he asked concerned.
"Yeah, I just couldn't take the heat anymore."
