A note from Jayne.
We've moved on a few months and Nick is just a wild but, in many ways also a pleasant memory. After the risky stuff I got up to with him including him fucking me in a changing room at Harrods, I decided to keep my head down and knickers on and went celibate for several months.
That was before I accepted my new status as a single, near fifty-year-old woman with a hell of a sex drive who was in greater demand than I'd ever imagined I would be.
In the previous parts I've explained that there seemed to be something missing with the sex I had with the three or four guys I slept with after the divorce came through. I thought for a while that I may well have found that missing something with Nick but I hadn't and that was another reason for my decision to abstain from sex. Of course, though, despite my age with the big M looming over me and my revitalised sex drive, that couldn't last and it ended in the most spectacular manner.
Hugs
Jayne x
Finding what was missing -- my friends, Marie and Barnie?
Nick and I didn't last. Well, an affair based on such a preposterous kink as having sex in public places couldn't really and after two months we just drifted apart. So, once more I was single, living very alone and frustrated. However, I had learned about myself from Nick and I was pleased that I had done what I had with him although I was naturally also full of guilt and shame as well. But then, hey ho, I thought, that's life and I had to get on with it.
That said, I was still not sure whether I had found the missing element in my sex life. The something that was the trigger to enjoying sex as much as I had throughout most of my marriage. I felt that I was coming near to it with the sluttish behaviour I had so enjoyed when Kevin and I had some spectacular sex just after the divorce was finalised. And then recently with Nick when he had introduced me to having sex in places where being caught was well on the cards. With both of them my orgasms were simply sublime whereas with others they were far from that as I had to refuse one guy and feign it with another.
We, Kevin and I that is, had known Barnie and Marie since we were in our early twenties. We were in a group of a dozen or so that spent a lot of time together at pubs, parties and going to clubs in London. It was the early nineties when youth was beginning to rule the world, well certainly our little part of it. At first, the group wasn't made up of couples. Things like that were fairly fluid and two of us would become a couple for a period ranging from just one evening through to a few weeks before splitting up and both going back into the pack. In fact, Barnie and I had paired up once or twice at parties and on one occasion had all the bedrooms not have been taken I think we would have slept together before Marie and he did.
Gradually, though, couples with longer-term ambitions were formed including Kevin and me and Marie and Barnie and slowly the group broke up. Us four kept in touch though and had remained friends as we got older then married and Kevin and I had the children. Em and Be had been the most supportive couple since our separation and subsequent divorce. I hadn't really realised just how difficult it is for a couple when their friends break up until then, but they stuck with me all the way taking my side and rejecting Kevin.
By choice, they have no children. They had spent much of the last ten years or so living abroad with Barnie's job being something in the oil industry and Marie being a radiologist. During my self-imposed year of celibacy, they returned from a spell in Venezuela claiming that they were going to stay in England in the future. They bought a flat in Shoreditch, which had recently become the new heart of swinging, using the old-fashioned meaning, London and a house on the Kent coast a couple of hours away.
Em was attractive without being a beauty and sexy without being a vamp. She was a little shorter than me and ever since we'd known each other she'd had a slim body with great legs and long, beneath her shoulders hair. Barney is about six feet tall and has a great physique being a runner and quite serious tennis player.
A couple of months or so after Nick and I drifted apart I went to stay with them for a long weekend. Although Marie and I had chatted on the phone most weeks and we'd exchanged some long emails and WhatsApp, we hadn't met for probably six months so we had a lot of catching up to do. I drove down to Kent late on the Saturday morning arriving in time for lunch. Barnie had gone to a football match so Marie and I had all the afternoon to natter. We exchanged news on the group that we used to run with, talked about why they were now settling down back in England and what had gone on with my life since the separation.
Barnie got home around six and the three of us chatted as we had a drink sitting in the back garden. He and I were making innocent eyes at each other and mildly flirting before we all got ready to go out to dinner. Ever since we'd almost slept with each other at that party we had carried on like that. Marie was aware that we had fancied each other and could well have had sex had things gone that way. She also knew that we flirted but was aware that Barnie was totally faithful and that I, like her, would never shag a friend's partner.
We had a delightful dinner at a local pub that was within walking distance so there were no worries about drinking and driving. We took advantage of that by having three bottles of wine between us.
Walking home all of us dressed in shorts and tees, Barnie was in the middle and he put his arms around both of us as we laughed and joked the few hundred yards through the failing light back to the cottage. There, with brandies in our hands we sat in the cosy lounge listening to music in candlelight and, inevitably I guess, the conversation turned to my ex and me. I found myself opening up to them and telling them more about the background and how I felt. This, for some reason, included my feelings about dating and even touched on the loneliness and how much I missed being with a man. I guess the wine and the talk made me a little loose tongued and morbid and I started to cry. Whilst I'd done plenty of that in the first couple of months after the separation it had now been some time since I'd broken down and I said I was sorry. Both of them were understanding and my heart went out to them. Marie came and sat next to me on the sofa and put her arms around me as Barnie said consoling words and told me what a silly and selfish bastard Kevin was. They made me feel better and, being so close to Marie, for she kept her arms round me, was strangely comforting and the tearfulness passed as I sipped my brandy.
"Well I reckon it's time I showed you where things are upstairs Jay," she said, adding. "Then we'll get you tucked up in bed shall we, this Kentish air is very tiring?"
Smiling I replied, "Yes mum," and we all laughed.
After she'd shown me where the gust bathroom was, I undressed, slipped into a long tee shirt that I wear in bed when not at home and went to the guest bathroom and cleaned my teeth. Back in my room I had just slid under the single sheet, for it was still very warm, when there was a knock on the door and Marie called out as she opened the door,
"Everything OK luv?".
"Yes great, I'm fine now," I smiled as she came into the room wearing a lacy nightdress that showed off her slim lovely figure and great legs.
"Good, I'm pleased," she replied coming over and sitting on the side of the bed.
We talked for a while about the divorce and how things had changed for me. I said how lucky she and Barnie were to be in such a loving relationship. She was sitting very close to me so that my leg under the sheet was pressed against her hips and as she moved or leaned forward the loose top of her nightdress would gape and I couldn't avoid seeing down it. Several times I saw most of her small breasts and twice I saw her nipples as well. I didn't think anything of it for we were close friends and several times I'd showered with her after playing tennis.
"Can anyone join in?" I heard Barnie saying from outside the door on which he'd discretely tapped before putting his head round it.
"Sure, the more the merrier," I responded pulling the sheet up a little as I was aware that the thin tee shirt was stretched fairly tightly across my boobs. He walked in carrying the bottle of cognac and three balloon glasses.
"Perhaps a nightcap ladies?" he asked plopping himself down on the other side of the bed to Marie as he poured them out.
"You know Jay," Barnie said seriously, "He must have been fucking barmy to let you go by being so fucking stupid with that Helen cow, mustn't he Marie?"
"Yes" my friend replied lifting her hand and running the back of her fingers across my cheek. "Bloody stupid to lose such a gorgeous and lovely woman."
They were making feel a little weepy again with their encouraging and loving support.
"Come on Jay, don't let it get to you again," Marie said, her fingers gently clasping my chin, "He's just not worth it."
"I know, I know," I said fighting back the tears. "It's just that I so miss him."
"Him?" Barnie said.
"Well no not him but a man, being held and being cuddled, having company, someone to chat with oh, you know what I mean."
"Yes darling, yes we do," Marie murmured taking me into her arms and holding me. It felt nice and I found myself cuddling up to her, but more like a baby to a mother or like sisters than anything else. Barnie leaned forward and put his arms around both of us. He kissed me on the head and muttered softly.
"You know that we both love you don't you Jayne and that we'd do anything for you?"
I smiled at him and replied, "Yes Barnie, you are both so kind to me and I'm very grateful."
"Well I'll leave you two to it so you can get into your ladies talk," he said smiling and making a diplomatic exit.
I was still in Marie's arms with my one of my larger, fuller breasts pressed against her pert boobs as she gently stroked my hair. She moved her face so she was looking directly into my eyes and smiled as she said, "We really were so sorry that you and Kevin split up, men can be such bastards can't they Jay, who needs them really?"
I looked directly into her eyes as she said that and saw such love, affection and understanding in them. "I don't know Marie, but they have their uses, sometimes," I whispered feeling a sudden surge of excitement, but having no idea why as I joked, "Changing plugs can really bugger up your nails can't it?".
"I know darling you told me earlier, remember?" she said referring back to a chat we'd had during the afternoon when I'd told her how terribly frustrated I had been during the year waiting for the divorce. I remembered that I had told her that whilst waiting for the divorce I had remained celibate and that I had messed around in chat rooms. I didn't, though, tell her what I had got up to in them although, I expect she guessed for she told me that they as a couple had used them as well, but I didn't ask why they had.
"And since the divorce love, have you embraced the single women's world of the twenty-twenties and lots of dating?" she'd asked. I told her that I had, although I didn't mention that I'd had sex with Kevin or how many men I'd been with but I did tell her that I had and still was having problems with enjoying sex.
Shortly after Barnie left Marie and I stopped our embrace and I laid back flat on the bed as Marie said quietly, "He really means it you know love as, indeed I do too."
"Yes I know, you two have been so understanding and helpful."
"It's nothing dear, just what friends are for, I just wish we'd have been here more for you, perhaps we could have helped avoid the break up."
"Thanks love but I doubt that you could as it was deep rooted and had been building for some time, I'm best out of it in most ways."
"No all ways then?"
"Well yes but being single again after all those years has its er, um issues you know," I said looking at her and seeing that she was getting what I meant.
