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Cult 101: Defining Your Cult's Purpose and Establishing Moral Authority
Alright, this one's a little 'out there' and I imagine I may piss off a few people along the way. Remember, it's only a joke, so lets not get too crazy.
This is an entry in the April Fools Story Contest, 2016. I hope you enjoy it.
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I held Bethany close. "Can you hear it?"
She gazed at me with those huge milk chocolate eyes. "He's speaking to you now?"
"Speaking doesn't adequately describe it. It's a total experience. My entire body is resonating with His message. It's hard to believe you can't feel it."
"What's He saying?" she asked hesitantly.
"If you can't hear it, perhaps it's not meant to be." I pulled away, unwrapping her arms, and leaned back in the couch.
The poor girl was almost in tears. She got up and stood before me, head bowed in sorrow.
I shook my head, displaying my disappointment in her. "I believe in you, Bethany. Now you need to believe. We'll keep trying until you get it, or until I can't go on." I pulled open my shirt, baring my chest, and laid back on the couch turning partly on my side. I patted the space beside me, making room for her. "This time, relax. Open yourself to the message. Don't listen with your ears, listen with your body and soul, absorb it through your skin. Take your time." She came closer, and I stopped her. "Take off your slippers."
Bethany was wearing the t-shirt she slept in, and cute fuzzy slippers. She kicked off her slippers and slid next to me. I enveloped her in my arms and held her while she stretched out beside me. She was tense, her arms folded over her chest. "Relax, open yourself, and listen."
She loosened up, her arms opening to me. I stroked her hair softly, brushing across her temple. It took a minute or so, and then I felt her tense up.
"Relax," I reminded her.
"I ... I heard something." Her voice quivered with excitement.
"Good. What did you hear?"
"I don't know. It was too soft."
"Keep listening. Feel it with your entire being. The message is deafening. It's screaming out from every pore of my skin." I rolled further onto my back, pulling her on top of me, embracing her. I held her close, her forehead pressed against my lips, my hands holding her head still. "Open yourself. Abandon all other thoughts. Feel the message."
She squirmed. "My skin's burning."
"It's the message. Let it through. Relax. Accept it."
She trembled, lying as still as possible, her legs aligned with mine. "It's there. A whisper," she murmured. "I can almost make it out." She shifted, rubbing her legs against mine. "My legs are tingling."
"They're receiving the message. You're receiving it. Keep listening."
She was on the verge of crying again from frustration. "Why? Why can't I hear it?" Abruptly she sat up, peeling off her shirt, exposing her full breasts to me.
"Bethany, our covenant ..."
"Please, Joshua," she begged, plaintively. "I need to feel more of your skin against mine, to receive the message. Please."
I looked at her sternly, while she pleaded, before slowly nodding. She lay atop me, her breasts pressing against my chest, her panty covered pubis firm against my crotch. I could feel myself starting to respond to her near nakedness.
"Thank you, Joshua. I'm sorry I'm not more open."
I moved her slightly, positioning her so that as much of our bodies were in contact as possible. I scooted her upward so our faces were pressed together. Then I reached for her head, turning her face, staring into her eyes. "Listen, child. You have to listen! I can't take much more of this, it's screaming through me, trying to get out. It's deafening."
I held her face in my hands, gazing into her eyes, our mouths millimeters apart, our breath shared.
I almost smiled when her eyes grew wide. "I, I hear it, Joshua. It's louder now."
"What is it saying?"
Her face scrunched up in misery. "I ... I still can't understand it. It's so close, Joshua, so close. Dear God, my skin is burning!"
"Perhaps it's not to be. We can't get much closer than this."
She struggled with the listening, concentrating hard, her eyes squeezed tight. "Just a little more, that's all I need." Her body writhed against mine, straining.
"Enough, Bethany. Your entire body is touching mine. You're still not open enough. I'm sorry."
The tears slowly rolled down her cheek. "Can we, Joshua? Can we try just a little more?"
"I don't see how. If you can't hear it now, I don't know if you ever will. It's exhausting. Perhaps I was wrong."
She squirmed off of me and pulled her panties off, sitting there naked. "Joshua, I'm so close. I can hear it, I can." She reached for my shorts, hesitating. "Please, let me do this. I have to know."
I pushed her away. "Enough!" I barked at her. "You know my feeling about this."
She bowed her head. "Please, Joshua." The tears were streaming down her face.
I stood before her. "NO! I will not forsake my vow because you're weak." I was clearly hard. "This is not His will. If you can't hear Him, that's your failure, not mine."
She ran from the room, grabbing her shirt, sobbing openly.
I got up and went to the bar, made myself a stiff drink, then sat back and relaxed. I'd give her about 30 minutes, then I'd get ready for her epiphany.