May 20, during my daughter's game break, I went out to get food. I noticed Emman's van. He was there waiting for me.
"What are you doing here, Emman?"
"I want to watch your daughter play. I'm going to record her game so you have a souvenir, Joy."
"Wow, that's so sweet of you, Emman. She's on a game break right now. Do you want us to get a take out?"
"I have food here, Joy. Let's eat here in the van."
We shared chicken Caesar salad and Coke. We're feeding each other while talking about what had transpired the previous night.
"You made me horny the way you ate that banana this morning, Joy. Care to do that to me?" He asked after eating.
"I'll give you a pleasurable moment after my daughter's game, Emman. She's got another game break after this. Come on, let's go, it's time."
He was on the other side of the volleyball court while recording my daughter's game so he could catch me on camera as well.
The game finished quickly since my daughter's team won 2 games in a best of 3 match.
The next game would start in 15 minutes so Emman and I hurried to the parking lot and got into his van.
I unbuttoned and unzipped his pants. I was tracing his penis thru the fabric of his briefs. I was massaging his entirety until I could feel its wetness. He took off his pants and briefs up to his ankles and I started licking his tip, his shaft, and massaging his balls. When I was about to put his penis inside my mouth, his cellphone vibrated.
Lorna texted him saying that she's got a vertigo attack.
Emman pulled my hair to get me off him.
"Joy, Lorna needs me. I'm 1.5 hours away. I have to leave now."
He opened the door frantically without saying another word. I got out feeling so sorry for myself. I felt like a whore, like Hugh Grant's whore that he just picked up on the street, gave him a blowjob until the police caught them. Good for that whore, at least she got famous.
Teary eyed, I went to the washroom and stayed there for a while. How could he treat me that way? He put me on a pedestal and then dropped me in a snap of a finger.
When the games were over and the girls were all settled in at the hotel, I wrote Emman a note:
Emman,
I don't think you're ready to leave her. I've told you it was okay to be your FUBU, to be the 5th best in your life, next to Lorna and your kids. You're the one who wanted to get serious and told me that I'd be your only one. You made me fall for you. I should have backed out...I should have backed out...we shouldn't have started this in the first place...Go back to her. She needs you. Pretend we didn't happen. I just don't know what excuse you're going to say if she noticed that your wedding ring is missing. GOODBYE.
I sent it at his work address thru snail mail.
May 21, the entire team flew back to Winnipeg jubilant since we took home the gold. While everyone kept on chattering, I was staring by my window holding back tears.
May 22, he must have received my letter as I got countless texts, emails, and voice mails full of his cries and begs. But just like with his phone calls, I just ignored them all.
Voice mails:
Please talk to me or text me. I love you, honey. It's only in your arms that I felt true love. It's like heaven when you hug me. Now it's all but a dream because I've hurt you. I need you now and forever. I need you to know that you're the only one I truly love. All I wish is to be with you again.
Mama, honey, I miss you so much, Joy Talan. Joy Talan, where are you? Please text me back. I love you.
Hi, honey. I miss your sweet voice. I really miss you. I love you. Please call. You're the one that God gave to me. You're the answer to my prayer so all through time and each moment you'd be the one I'll love. You are the light of my world and half of my heart. No one would ever replace you even for half a second. There's only you, now and forever. From now on you'll be the cause of all my actions. If there's a future that I am looking forward to, it's because there's you. Forever is not enough to love you each moment again and again.
I'll wait for you forever. I miss you so much. I won't give up, honey. I love you. I hope our memories are still alive in you.
Hi, honey. Good morning. I love you so much. I can't sleep. I've been crying. I hope to see you again. I'll never tire calling you...texting you...leaving you voice mails...emailing you... I came to realize that I'm now alone. I'm still in pain. I know I'll be happy with you. This time I will offer you all my love and time.
Hi, honey. Good Friday morning. I miss you so much. I want to hear your voice. My life started to change when you came back. I'd wake up each day feeling alright because I knew you're just right by my side and made me feel things would work out just fine. I needed someone like you in my life. Now there's an empty space in my heart. I'll never forget how you brought the sun to shine in my life and took the worries and fears that I had. It's not everyday that someone like you comes my way. No words can express how much I love you.
Hi, hon. Hi. I'm sorry. Where are you? Please text back. My love is only for you. I'm loving you once because once is forever. Please listen to my begging heart. I promise you, you are the only one. My love is only for you.
Hi, honey. I love you so much. I love you forever. This is for you.
He's singing Forevermore (Side A).
As long as rhythm is everywhere, I'll keep on singing songs for you. As long as music is still within my heart, I'll be with you. I will stay with you forever. For whatever it takes don't ever think that I'll lose faith.
Hi, honey. Please call. Please. I'm sorry. Or text me back. Please. I'm sorry. I miss you. Please don't be mad at me. Sorry for what I did. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please call.
Honey, please call. Please. Please. Honey, please. Sorry.
Sorry, honey. Please. Please. I can't sleep. I'm sorry. I always stare at your photo every time I'm alone.
Hi, honey. It's me again. I forgot good night kiss. Tsup. I love you. I want you to know that my heart is shouting for you. I dream of loving you and to be with you for the rest of my life. You're the only thing that's missing in my life. I hope you still want to be with me and to love me. I've waited for so long hoping that I'd be given a love that's true and unfading.
