[These stand-alone stories are more enjoyable when read in order]
This one came from left field but it is a direct consequence of my job as the postman of Upper Cockton. I'm the collection point for all my neighbours parcels, so vans don't travel our neighbourhood.
I think I mentioned Clive and Barbara, our first couple in Upper Cockton. He is a successful investment banker, and she is a successful investment banker's trophy wife and hostess. All the neighbours get an invitation to their end of summer party, in the big marquee in their garden, as a thank you for any inconvenience caused by their social events.
I had just driven my restored Triumph TR6 around the block for a final check-up, before listing it on an auction site.
Barbara came down the road as I was taking pictures of the car on my drive. Barbara is a very well-preserved fiftyish blonde; always immaculately turned out even when dressed casually, like now in a Guernsey sweater, chinos, and blue loafers. The little things told me she was beyond my pay grade. A diamond ring that would pay for my next three restoration projects. Her Rolex the same. I pretended I hadn't noticed her and continued snapping. Barbara pushed her sun glasses onto her immaculately styled wavy hair and stood hands on hips in mock annoyance. I turned and took three quick pictures of her. By the last, her hostess instinct kicked in and she smiled.
"What are you going to do with my pictures Tom?" She smiled suggestively. There has always been an undercurrent between us.
"I'm going to use them for inspiration Barbara. But I think you know that already."
She liked me to be interested in her, even though we both knew it was a harmless flirtation on both our parts.
"Now you've finally got that car running, I've a favour to ask you on Clive's behalf. His dad had one, and he wouldn't let Clive drive it as a teenager. He was wondering if you would do a swap for the weekend." She stood close and gave me her charming look that had defeated many objections over the years.
"I don't see why not, Barbara. I'll let him have the keys when he drops you off. What would you like to do this weekend?" She flushed as the image went through her head. "I'll throw in my golf clubs to sweeten the deal."
She slapped me playfully on the arm. "Stop it, Tom. The very notion that my husband would pimp me out so he could go racing around the countryside." She looked me in the eye as we shared the fantasy. "So what do you say? He's got this idea of taking me away for a dirty weekend in Brighton. This rakish red sports car is just the sort of vehicle adulterers use, according to Clive. It was good enough for his dad."
Next morning Clive is transferring two overnight bags from his Mercedes E Class saloon into the TR6 boot. "Thanks for this Tom. Barbara told me about your negotiations. What sort of clubs are they?" That earned him a slap from her.
They dressed differently from their usual country casuals weekend attire. Clive in white chinos and Hawaiian shirt. Barbara wore a skinny ribbed tee shirt with a v-neckline showing nice cleavage. Her skirt stopped above the knee. The white stiletto sling backs were definitely not her usual thing.
"Do I look like the sort of woman you'd take to Brighton for a dirty weekend, Tom?" Her make up was different too. Barbara did tarty very well.
"Come on Barbara. Before you get yourself into trouble again. Will you take our picture Tom?" I snapped them standing side by side on his phone. Then Clive stood behind Barbara and lifted her left hand in his towards the camera. I got what they wanted and snapped the tan lines of their missing wedding rings.
Barbara laughed at my reaction. I thought it was not the first time they'd played these games. It was a year before I had confirmation, but that's another story.
I waved them off, wondering what I was going to do with a flashy Mercedes for the weekend, then inspiration hit me.
It was supposed to be my weekend with the girls, but annoyingly Linda had forgotten the dates when she agreed they could sleep over with their friends. I would be the bad guy if I said no. I was going to settle for a trip to the park and lunch with them, but now I could go one better. I made the arrangements and phoned Linda to get the girls dressed up for when I arrived.
I surprised her in a suit when I turned up at Linda's new house. The one she bought when she married the man she'd been having an affair with during my last five years in the army. It annoyed me when the girls appeared in their usual jeans and sweatshirts. Either Linda had not told them or they could not be bothered.
"I can't take you to a posh hotel for afternoon tea and cakes in a fancy car, dressed like that, can I?" My eight- and nine-year-olds scampered back and changed into their Sunday best. After Linda wiped off their clown make up, replacing it with a touch of blush, we were ready to leave.
"You look very nice in your suit Tom. I'm sure the three of you will have a lovely time." Linda was giving me the kitten eyes, angling for an invitation.
"It's my time with the girls Linda. It's been cut short as it is. I want to enjoy it." I said it softly, but it still stung like a slap.
"Off course Tom. Give mum a kiss, girls. You all enjoy yourselves."
In the car, my two passengers whispered. "Mum was begging for Dad to invite her." They both did impressions of Linda's kitten eyes and burst out laughing. "Maybe she should have tried it on Harry so he didn't go to golf with his friend's, again."
I'd never pumped the kids for dirt on Linda and Harry's relationship. It had taken me ages to stop being angry about it, so I didn't want reminders. But now and then, the girls made an offhand comment to suggest all was not well. I didn't want to rock the boat. I enjoyed being a weekend dad. My love life could not cope with anything more complex.
We had a lovely time at a well-known fancy hotel. The girls behaved like young ladies and insisted I took photos of everything and posted them on my Facebook page. There were lots of likes from Linda.
When I took the girls' home, I could not read the expression on Linda's face. She asked if I'd drop them all at their sleepover because her car was playing up. I ended up delivering the three of them and their bags to Linda's friend Sonia. I couldn't stand the woman. She'd lied and covered up for Linda while she and Harry were carrying on behind my back.
Linda had a surprise for me as she shoed them from my car. "The girls have had a wonderful day. Thanks for being understanding about the sleepover. I'll be more careful next time. Will you wait for me, Tom? Give me twenty minutes. Please." I clocked her suggestive smile.
