Twin Cities Tryst

Just A Little Note:

This chapter begins with a bizarre happening. It won't be for everyone. Skip to the first chapter break in order to avoid it and catch up later if you're that type of person. If you're the sort of dingbat who rants in reviews because you saw something you didn't like in a story but say nothing about the writing, I'll delete the review to spare everyone else your waste of their time. I'm just saying...

***

Chapter 3- I Can't Believe You Did That!

I felt Janie stir and moan. It wasn't a pleasant 'morning after a night of sex' moan either. It was a lament of misery, the vilification of a cruel universe that took no pity on its infinitesimal inhabitants. I could

feel

the aura of pain surrounding her.

"Is a threnody in order?" I asked, slowly sitting up in bed.

"Uhhhhhhhhh..." warbled the piteous mass hiding under the blankets, refusing to greet Creation. "I don't what that is... fuuuuuuuck..."

I waited in silence while the mass twitched and squirmed slowly next to me. Finally, though, a face emerged from tangle of sheets- the hair was a tangled mess, the skin deathly pale and the eyes bleary and red. I had always found Janie beautiful, but right now, she was kind of repulsive.

"Bathroom..." she whispered. "Get me to the fucking bathroom..."

I smiled and without another word, lifted her gently and carried her into our sumptuous bathroom, depositing her on her knees in front of the porcelain altar. Her entire body was pale, covered in sweat and she had a weird lemony scent to her.

"Uhhhhhh, Michael..." she groaned. "Why did you let me drink so much?"

"We didn't drink that much, don't try to pin this on me," I laughed. "I guess you didn't eat enough."

"Gnnnnn, motherfucker, we had four bottles of champagne, absinthe, spent all our time in jacuzzi and... and..."

Wait for it...

"BLAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

I was kneeling beside her, smirking. "Sorry, darling, I didn't quite get that. Would you repeat what you said, please?"

"Fuck yAAAAAAGGGGGH!!"

"Oh dear," I sighed, stroking her back gently while her body underwent its peristaltic spasms. "You must be freezing, let me get you something to warm yourself."

I left Janie at the toilet bowl for a moment, retrieving a large, plush towel, along with my cellphone. I placed the towel over her back to warm her and waited patiently. I looked at my phone. Holy crap, it wasn't even seven am yet.

"BLARRRRRRRRRRRGH!!"

Boy, when Janie was hungover and sick, she went balls to the wall. This wasn't by any means the first time I'd kept a friend in hangover distress company, so I just waited patiently. "You want some music? I've got Amon Amarth and Manowar handy."

"BLAHHHHHHH! Oh, fuck you and all your heavy metal glory! BLARRRRRRGH!!"

"I think my iPod is in my pack, there should be a playlist called 'Music To Honk By' on there."

"BLARRRRRFFFFF!!"

It wasn't a resounding 'no' or rejection of my idea, but I ultimately decided against music because her voice was still rather weak and I might not be able to hear her speak between heaves if necessary. Not that she was saying anything too important, outside of vilifying me and my role in her current agony.

"The towel..." she rasped, almost in a panic. "Get the fucking towel off me, it's like needles on my skin, oh Jesus! Get it BLAHHHHHHH!!"

I shrugged and removed the towel readily. I suppose being cold was preferable to death by a thousand pinpricks.

"My hair..." Janie pleaded. "Hold my hair so I don't puke in it..."

I readily complied and also gently massaged her lower back. I felt somewhat awkward in this position (I could see her puke) and decided to change locations. So keeping her hair in my hand, I shuffled around and knelt behind her. I felt this was more productive, since I could now support her body, keeping her braced at the toilet. The fact that her lovely ass was now pressed to me was something of a bonus.

And I wasn't exactly sure why, but her pussy seemed to still be gooey and wet. This, of course, had a predictable effect on my anatomy. She didn't seem to notice as my cock grew hard, resting against her moist tunnel and between her ass cheeks.

An evil smile crossed my face and I gently slid my tool into her womanhood, which yielded before it easily.

"Oh my God!" she exclaimed in confusion. "Are you fucking me while I BLAHHHHHHH!!"

I shuddered in shock and delight. Her pussy clenched and rippled around me tighter than I could have imagined as she honked. I remember a girl sneezing once while I was inside her and it tightened her up so much I would have popped out of her if she hadn't been sitting on me. This was the same, but it went on as long as her diaphragm contractions did.

"Jesus!" she wailed while I held her hair. "I can't believe you would- "GLAHHHHHHH!!"

"Actually, it feels really good," I mentioned as I began stroking back and forth now that I was getting the measure of the contractions. "You clench so tight, I'm gonna cum really hard, for sure."

"Motherfucker!" she groaned. "I'm gonna kKYAAAAAAHHHHH!!"

"You'll be fine," I panted as I thrust in and out of her, watching as my cock split her lips and plunged deep into her inner pink. "Maybe the orgasm endorphins will help you."

"You're the one who's gonna cum, fucker, not mAAAAAAGH!!"

"Well, of course you won't if you're negative about it." I said simply, still holding her hair but now filming with my cellphone in my other hand. I was careful to only film her from the waist and ass down, so the camera couldn't see she was parked at the toilet. It was an amazing video, my hips thrusting, my cock opening her pussy like a sticky blossom...

"BLAHHHHHHHH!!"

Damn. Maybe I could edit the sound out of that video. It kind of lost its charm at that moment.

"Thanks, you just ruined a perfectly good video." I said dryly.

"YOU'RE FILMING THIS?!" she cried out in horror.

"Well, not anymore," I replied, putting my phone down. "Where's your sense of cinema?" I resumed thrusting back and forth strongly, her body bumping against the porcelain rim. She grunted and gasped and moaned, although in pain or pleasure I could not readily tell.

"BLAAAARRRRRRFFFFF!!"

Pain, obviously. I felt bad for her. That last contraction, though, had felt really

really

good for me and I felt the tingling building up in my body. I pressed inside her harder and stroked back and forth quickly. The warm, wet heat of climax was spreading through me as bliss approached.

"Oh, yes, Janie," I moaned. "Got one more in you?"

"YARRRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!"

I shuddered as I came, deep inside her pussy. She clenched and gripped around me almost mercilessly. I reached under and massaged and groped her breasts, which were cold from being pressed to the merciless white bowl. She squirmed and writhed in my grip, her churning adding to my incredible pleasure as I continued to cum.

I was finished cumming but I kept thrusting, my cock still hard inside her. Hoping to pass off some of my leftover bliss to her poor, tormented body, I caressed her thighs and massaged her lower back while I continued fucking her. She was almost like a dead thing in front of me.

Finally, though, she shivered and stretched, letting out a low, loud sigh. I was relieved that orgasm had taken over and her retching had stopped.

"BLAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

Okay, maybe not.

She finally collapsed on her side on the plush rug, popping off my cock and laying there, shuddering. I let her be for a moment while trying to figure out what to do. I finally decided to shower us, perhaps that would make her feel more human.

So with my still-erect member pointing the way, I stood and went to the shower, turning on both the heads and bringing them up to a great pressure and heat. Janie protested as I picked her up off the ground, but did not resist. I carried her into the shower and sat down, my back against the wall and put her in my lap, facing me. The showerheads bombarded us with hot water, which I hoped would ease the pains she felt.

She held onto me feebly, like a rag doll in my arms. She moaned ever so quietly. I caressed her body and kissed her, whispering that I loved her. My cock was still erect and pressed up between our stomachs. She squirmed her hips around until I got the message. I adjusted our bodies and put myself back inside her. She sighed and said nothing, just letting the water do its work.

Had to give the hotel credit for its plumbing, because half an hour later, the water was still hot. She finally looked up at me, her eyes still red and bleary, wet hair clinging to her face and shoulders, skin still creepy Ring-girl pale. But she smiled feebly.

"I can't believe you fucked me while I was puking," she whispered. "That's so rapey."

I chuckled. "You're the only girl I'd do that to."

"The only girl?" she asked, looking skeptical.

"Well, maybe two others, including Cait and Anita." I admitted. "But they wouldn't mind afterward."

She sighed and pressed her face to my shoulder. "It's a good thing I know your sense of humour or I'd think you were a total sociopath. Gawd, I feel like shit."

"What, the orgasm didn't help?" I asked.

She raised her head and gave me a look. "Why haven't I killed you yet?"

"Because you're in love with me for the next five days and I'm pretty indestructible." I replied. "Besides, don't deny that you had an orgasm, I know how you orgasm now."

"Okay, I did," she allowed. "And maybe it took the edge off. But Michaaaaaael, I still feel like shiiiiiiiiit. This can't happen on our vacation..."

"I'm working on it, I promise." I said gently. "Hold still..."

I gently took her face and smiled into it. With my fingers I coaxed her mouth to open, which she did willingly.

The I tilted her head back and water from the showerheads flooded into her mouth. She gagged and thrashed for a moment before spitting it out and scowling at me with those miserable red eyes.

"That was your solution?" she demanded.

"Your breath is awful," I replied. "I just wanted an temporary fix while the real solution got here."

"Drowning me is not a temporary fix, you bastard..." she hissed, trying to push off my lap, but I held her firmly. She couldn't contest my strength in her weakened condition and ended up just staying pinned to me, my cock still deep inside her. She sighed forlornly.

"It's like Stockholm Syndrome," she murmured. "Being in love with you could kill me."

Another half hour and the water was starting to cool. I gently lifted her and turned off the heads. Grabbing towels as I went by, I carried Janie to our bed and laid her on one of them and patted her down gently with the other. Then I pulled the covers over us and caressed her gently, whispering to her about how we loved one another until the room service phone beeped. Janie whimpered at the sharp noise and I reminded myself to put it on the vibrate function or at least turn it down.

"Hi, Michael," Erika said cheerfully. "Just wanted you to know that we have your special request ready. Quite a night, I take it?"

"For one of us, at least," I replied. "Could you please have someone bring it up? I'm tending to my patient."

"I can do that." Erika replied. "See you in five minutes. Do you need more champagne, by the way?"

"Yes, three more if at all possible." I confirmed. "Thank you, see you in five."

I hung up the phone and stood up. "Erika's on her way up with your hangover remedy, my love," I declared as I put on my robe. "You stay there."

"No problem." Janie said miserably, sinking beneath the covers again. I went to the window and opened the curtains, allowing morning light to spill into the room. She might protest initially, but it would help kickstart her metabolism once I got her going. Tradition dictated that we let her sleep off the hangover, but Janie and I had way too much fun planned, so I wasn't about to let biology get in the way.

A knock at the door indicated Erika had arrived. She was certainly punctual. I opened the door and she smiled at me, holding a small box of goodies.

"Wow, nice robe," she remarked, checking out my attire. This morning I was wearing the black robe with the silver cranes. Damn right I looked splendid. "Is that silk?"

"Yup, from China." I said, nodding. "Janie, Erika's here with the answer to your woes."

"Hi, Erkia..." came a feeble voice from the bedroom.

The advocate giggled. "Poor thing. Does this really work?"

"It sure does, I learned the trick from Russians." I said. "Want to see it in action?"

She thought about that. "If it isn't an intrusion and doesn't take long," she answered. I gestured for her to enter and she followed me to the bed, where she saw the lump cowering under the covers.

"Oh, you poor dear," Erika said sympathetically. "Did the big bad man get you drunk?"

"Nnnnn, he fucked me while I was puking." Janie moaned.

Erika turned her head to look at me, eyebrow raised. I shrugged and nodded and it took all her willpower not to begin laughing.

"Alright, get out here so I can fix you up." I said.

There was a petulant grunt from beneath the covers.

"I'd hate to have to use all these VIP passes to those exclusive clubs all by myself." I reasoned.

There was silence followed by a resigned groan. Janie finally emerged from beneath the covers and sat up wearily, like a ninety year-old woman. She clearly didn't care if Erika saw her breasts and Erika didn't even blink. Doubtless, dealing with rappers and rock bands, she'd seen plenty of this before.

I took the small box from Erika while she put down the champagne bottles and opened it. Inside were four mason jars, closed tight and filled with a greenish liquid. I took one out and held it up for inspection.

"The hell's that?" Janie said, frowning.

"Pickle brine." I replied. "Ultimate hangover cure that doesn't involve getting drunk again."

"Oh, fuckin' ew..." my lover protested, making a face.

"It works quickly and it's better than a hangover." I pointed out. "Not like you can taste anything at the moment anyway, right?"

"So, what, I just drink back that whole jar?" she asked.

I nodded. "If you want, I'll drink one along with you, just to prove its safe."

"This outghta be interesting." Erika mused, watching.

Janie took the jar, looked at it and then squinted up at me suspiciously. "This isn't some weird scheme of yours to knock me out so you can get all rapey, is it?"

I shrugged. "Drink the drink, find out."

She sighed and then looked down at the jar. She twisted the cap but it didn't budge. She tried again, to no avail. Finally, she just hung her head and held the jar out to me, clearly defeated. I chuckled and popped it open easily, handing it back.

"You loosened it for me." I assured her.

"Yeah, right, fuck you." Janie muttered. She looked down into the jar and then brought her nose close to give it a sniff, recoiling immediately.

"Agh!" she spat. "It smells like a granny's panties!"

"I don't want to know why you know that." I replied, toasting her and Erika with my jar before knocking it back, draining the contents in one swig. It was every bit as awful as I remembered it to be, but I wouldn't have a hangover on credit for weeks now.

Janie watched me drain my portion, drew a deep breath and steeled herself. She then pressed the jar to her lips and tilted her head back, draining it quickly. She didn't quite swallow it all, though, some stuck in her mouth, bulging in her cheeks and her body immediately rebelled at the vile taste. She squeezed her eyes shut and flapped her arms in a cute fit of panic. With huge effort, she swallowed the last of the brine and that gasped loudly, her eyes wide as dinner plates. She whirled and flopped on the bed on her front, squealing into the pillows and beating her fists against them.

"Shouldn't you be recording this?" Erika asked.

"My phone's still in the bathroom," I admitted. "Kinda used it to film myself doing her while she was honking."

Erika's eyes widened for a moment but then she began giggling almost uncontrollably. Janie didn't notice, seemingly still in the throes of death over on the bed. Her butt jiggled as she assaulted the pillows and sheets in outrage. Finally, though, the tantrum, spasm or seizure or whatever it was seemed to pass and she lay still, face down into the bed, barely moving.

"Feel better now?" I asked, trying not to laugh. She turned her head slowly and stared at me, eyes wide and looking very blank.

"Ffffffffuck..." was all she managed to say.

"There, not so bad, was it?" I suggested. "You're still alive and I'll bet your hangover is gone too."

"That really works, huh?" Erika mused, still looking at Janie. "Pickle juice?"

'Well, pickle brine in this case, but pickle juice isn't bad," I replied. "Kills the toxins built up in your system, restores electrolytes and works really damn fast. If it's good enough for Russians, it's good enough for me."

"I'll keep it in mind," the advocate said. "I should be going, thank you for a most entertaining start to my day. I hope you guys enjoy yours. See you around."

And with that, she let herself out. I disrobed and sat on the bed next to Janie, who was still staring off into the distance blankly. I reached over and caressed her damp hair gently. The first time was always traumatic. If I were a nicer person, I might have warned her.

Nah, that was hilarious.

"God, I hate you right now." Janie murmured finally.

"For curing your hangover?" I asked casually.

"Because that was awful and you make it look like fucking nothing. Your whole indestructible Viking god of battle thing is so sexy, but then it's also really annoying too. You're really annoying when you're right."

"I didn't say anything," I protested lightly. "It's not like I rubbed your nose in it about being right."

"That's why you're annoying," she groused, turning over on her back and scowling at the ceiling. "Because you don't say it or act smug about it and yet somehow it's the most obvious thing in the world, it's an aura or some shit."

"I didn't know you saw auras." I said, sounding interested, even if I was only trolling her.

"What are the odds of you

just for once

shutting the fuck up and coming down here and kissing me?" she growled.

"Brush your teeth," I replied firmly. "You probably taste like pickle brine and vomit."

She shot me a look and then got out of the bed, sighing, clearly beshat upon by all of reality. She walked into the bathroom and the sink was running for some time, followed by mouthwashing and spitting noises. Gurgling seemed to wrap the show up and she came back in, crawling onto the bed and snuggling her naked body to me, sighing.

"Thank you for the whole hangover cure thing," she said softly. "I feel a million times better now. Is it really that good a cure?"

"Is your body sore?" I asked. "Like your muscles?"

"Hm, not as much as I would expect after all that puking." Janie determined. "My stomach's usually a lot more sore from hangover pukes."

I chuckled. "That's endorphins talking. That isn't the pickle juice, that's endorphins from your orgasm when I fucked you while you were busy worshipping at the porcelain altar."

She looked up at me for several moments before sighing and then snuggling her head back against my chest.

"Still don't know how that wasn't rapey," she muttered. "Than again, I told you that you could fuck me in my sleep any time you liked, didn't I? And I didn't really object, I was just more in shock than anything."

"Well, I promise to not fuck you while you're puking again without permission." I declared, holding up my hand. "For the record, it felt really good, though. Y'know, when your pussy clenched and all."