The Blizzard was shutting down the Interstate and everybody was trying to find rooms. Thankfully I had a room at the Hilton, as all the hotels were booked, the churches were starting to open their shelters, and the Red Cross wasn't even in town. This place was snowed in. A lady came in and asked the clerk for a room and the clerk said they were full up. She asked if any other hotels were available, he said with the snow, everything was taken and the churches would be opening their shelters soon.
She asked the clerk, "How am I supposed to find out what the churches are doing, is there an emergency contact number? Do you call the fire department, how are people supposed to find out where to stay tonight? I don't have a room, and I can't go anywhere?"
"Ma'am there's nothing I can do; I don't have any rooms. Maybe you can wait in the bar and see if the police or the fire department comes around to give us any more information."
"Well, this just fucking sucks, yeah I'll go to the bar."
The bar had maybe 20 people in it, and I was sitting at the barstool near the end of the counter. The lady walked, ordered a drink, and proceeded to try to figure out what the hell to do with her night.
She looked at me and said, "Can you believe it, every fucking room in this God damn little hellhole of a shit town is fucking full up. What the fuck am I supposed to do."
I said, "Well for now, have a drink and wait to see if emergency services or whatever they have in this little town opens up anything and try your best."
People were generally bitching about the weather but being thankful for having a room at a Hilton. Some guy decided to be an ass and said, "Well I'd rather be stuck in a Hilton than at the Community Center or some evacuation center, sleeping on a cot listening to somebody snoring or farting all night and then trying to take a shower in some little bathroom with 300 other people trying to get in and do the same. No thanks I'll pay the price for a Hilton."
"Fuck," said the lady. "I'm so fucking mad at my husband I could kill that little cock sucker. Only fucking reason I'm out here, is he's too lazy to come all the way out here to check on his parent's cabin. He told me it wasn't any big deal, just drive out, look at the cabin and stay overnight. Son of a bitch even said I should find a fuck buddy to stay with. I need a fuck buddy, that assholes never been a good fuck in his life."
She got out her phone to call her husband and bitch him out.
"Hello," he answered.
"Thanks a fucking lot you dumb shit. I'm stuck in a fucking hotel without a room in the middle of a fucking blizzard in some shithole little town trying to go see your parent's cabin. Why didn't you come do this shit, this is your shit not mine, but I'm trying to be a good wife. Ohh fuck that, we're getting a divorce when I get home, you fucking little weasel."
He was laughing. Then he said, "Whoa bitch, who lit the fuse on your tampon. Don't bitch at me for your bad planning. That storms been on the weather for a week. You know you should really prepare and check the weather reports before you leave, sucks to be you. Why don't you just find somebody to shack up with. I know you must be horny, you haven't fucked me in months."
"You inconsiderate little dick motherfucker. The reason I haven't fucked you in months is because your dick is too small, and you don't get me off. You're a fucking pathetic lover. And why should I let you get me all messy then I have to go back into the bedroom and use a toy because you're not man enough to do the job. This whole fucking marriage is over. I'll call my attorneys and get you thrown out of my house. Goodbye you little asshole, maybe you can live at momma's cabin, you degenerate little fucking loser."
"That's fine bitch, I'll take half of everything you own. I hope you enjoy paying me some alimony."
"You stupid son of a bitch, you signed a prenuptial agreement before we ever got married, you get nothing. Our agreement was very specific and binding, you only get out of our marriage what you put into it, and I've got all the documentation that shows that you didn't put shit into it, so you don't get shit out of it. You'll be on the street, back in a gas station or flipping burgers. You're just a dumb shit unskilled labor, couch monkey. Goodbye asshole." And she hung up.
"Bartender, another drink for the lady."
She looked at me and said, "What the fuck are you doing? I can buy my own drinks."
I said "Lady, it's a shitty day out. Everybody's in a shitty mood. Your world is just getting ready to turn upside down and I'm just trying to be a nice guy and buy a pretty girl a drink. Drink it if you want to pour it out if you don't."
"Sorry," she said. "Not my best day. You heard more of my dirty laundry than most people. I got a loser husband, shitty sex life, I'm stuck in Podunk nowhere without a place to stay, and now I get to add a divorce on top of it. Sucks to be me. Thank you for the drink, my name is Cindy. Nice to meet you, kind stranger."
"Well, you can call me Peter. And you're very welcome."
"Hang on for a minute I got another phone call to make."
She called a number, and somebody answered, "hello."
"Dad it's Cindy, I'm dumping that fucking loser. I'm stuck in a fucking hotel without a room, out in the middle of nowhere and he knew it was gonna be bad weather and never bother telling me. I'm done. Can you call your brother and have him set up the divorce. I want that little fucker getting nothing. We have the prenuptial Uncle Brian drew up. I've got all the data that he didn't put shit into the marriage, so he doesn't get shit out of it. I want him on the street homeless. I just don't give a shit. Little fucker pissed me off."
Dad laughed. "Well honey you're in luck, Brian sitting right next to me you're on speakerphone and he's laughing his ass off."
"Sorry pumpkin, I knew that asshole was gonna be a loser, that's why I drew the prenuptial so tight. He doesn't have any access to the family money. And I've just locked him out of all the rest. I'll lock down everything you have, and you'll be good to go. Now what do we do about you needing a hotel room or something?" Uncle Brian said.
"There is absolutely nothing available until the emergency services, the churches or whatever, starts opening up shelters and this town is so small it'll be miracle if I find anything. I'll probably be sleeping on the floor in a high school gymnasium tonight. Hopefully I might even have a blanket. Just a shitty day."
"Baby I wish there was something we could do. I just don't know what to tell you."
"I'll be OK guys, it's gonna take more than this to get me down. If there's a bright side, I get rid of that little dick motherfucker and start a new life."
"There you go Princess, keep pushing forward. You're an attractive girl, you'll find somebody."
"Uncle Brian shame on you, I need a room not a lover tonight."
"Well Princess in a disaster sometimes they're one and the same." Dad and Uncle Brian were laughing.
