Sweat keeps me sane. Things might be tough now, but if I wasn't working out, it would be ten times worse. This past week I've been a gym sad boy. I go to group fitness class and work harder than the instructor thinks I can. Then I stretch, get my shit, and leave.
My mom has been in the hospital this whole week and I feel like I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown. I've read that single men in their late twenties don't fare well in terms of mental health, but I'm so down all the time it's hard to meet someone. I figure if I can get in better shape and up my confidence, I'll have a shot. As for now, I'm in a vicious cycle.
I don't know if you've ever been without physical touch for a long time, but it's driving me crazy. Hugging my mom while she lies in a hospital bed is more for her than for me at this point. I want to feel a woman's touch: to feel her soft curves press into me and hold on tight. I want to be desired. I also think desperation is the strongest cologne. So I keep my head down and mind my damn business. The only thing worse than being alone is being pitied.
Fuck me, ok. So I go to class on Monday. It's the 10am class and there aren't too many folks here. Most people are in the 8 or 9am class. When I arrive a few minutes early to stretch, the 9am people are grabbing their things and heading out or heading to the shower.
I surreptitiously look around to see who I'll be spending the next hour with. In the burbs it's mostly women in their 30s and 40s, a couple of fit dads, maybe a couple folks who are really out of shape and trying to get their shit together, and occasionally a young woman.
Today there's a guy in his 50s I've seen around: the getting-his-shit-together type. I've seen him before.There's a middle-aged couple who keep to themselves, a couple of suburban moms, and me. No one I'll have trouble keeping my eyes off.
The coach comes in, her voice amplified with mic and speakers, and she gives us some stretches. I'm these classes, the coach is always doing their best to keep energy high, even if no one is really feeling it. I think sometimes I go hard in class just so the coach feels like they're doing a good job.
Anyway, a few stretches in and a figure walks in from the lobby. I only catch her out of the corner of my eye, but I think she's young from the way she moves. I stretch to the right and get a better look. She's young: probably on summer break from college, but she carries herself confidently. She's probably 5'4" with dark brown hair, a thin figure, but not bony, and all she's wearing is a matching sports bra and biker shorts, hair in a ponytail. I didn't get a great look at her face before switching to the left side of the stretch.
Once stretches wrapped up, we all filed to different stations in the circuit. (This class was essentially 5 different stations and you'd rotate from one to the next.) I headed to a station that was more cardio-heavy to start, thinking I'd be alone, but to my surprise, this young woman wound up there as well. Neither of us acknowledged each other to avoid small talk, but I may have nervously glanced over her way. She was beautiful with piercing blue eyes, full lips, and an elegant nose on a confident face, a lock of hair falling into her face out of her ponytail.
"Clock is starting in 10...9..." coach hollered, starting the countdown.She and I got on our treadmills for the first part of the workout."3...2...1...get going, guys! I wanna see a good pace that you can maintain for the entire segment!"
And we were off. I always like to start at an easy pace to warm up. I've seen too many guys lay it all out early and collapse halfway through the workout. I kept my pace easy and my head cool.
I glanced over to see how my station buddy was doing. She was keeping the pace chilly too. After about a minute, we walked for a short interval and then picked it up again. Feeing warmer, I upped the pace a bit. Out of my peripherals, I thought I saw her head turn. Then, I heard her feet turning over a little faster. With a quick glance, I could see she was matching my pace. Maybe challenging me. "Ok, you wanna go?" I thought to myself. I held pace before we rested for another few seconds.
At the end of the rest, we both turned up our treads a little higher, moving into a solid run pace. With my long legs, I tried to make it look easy, threatening to turn the speed up even more if I wanted. She was in good conditioning, but I had the advantage here. I dialed my speed up ever so slightly and I could feel her glance over to my screen.When the first portion ended, I felt very warm, sweat collecting in my headband, my heart rate decently elevated. She was breathing heavy too, but moving well.
Time for Station 2. Here we worked with some weights. It was a chance to build some strength and lower the heart rate a bit. My goal here was to pick weights I could keep moving through: very little break time, ideally.When we begin, I think she noticed my strong pace and was trying to match me. It was only the second station but we were subtly pushing each other a little farther than we'd go alone.
Station 3 was rowing and burpees. My long legs gave me great leverage for the row and burpees, while painful, I could move through quickly. I could tell she was trying to keep up with me on this, her row getting a little fast and frantic. She looked over at my distance after a minute and finally spoke: "Damn."
I looked over to her and for a moment, her chest heaving, sweat covering every beautiful inch of her. All I got out was, "Thanks." She smiled out of the corner of her mouth and we both dropped down for burpees. But her pace was crazy. I was tracking how fast she went up and down and her short stature was a huge benefit for her here. I finally finished my reps and she was already back on the tower. "You're fast." I said, almost breathless. She didn't reply, just glanced over in acknowledgment. All that and she was still trying to keep my row pace. This girl had some fire.
Station 4 was a lot of crunches, leg raises, ab stuff. She crushed it while I struggled to kept a few reps chained together. I was laughing to myself a bit. The trainer came over and said to me, "Come on, match her pace! You can do it!" I tried in vain, but my core was going to failure now. I collapsed a bit, chuckling. She looked over to me and smiled, "What, can't keep up?" She was poking fun at me."Goddamn, I'll give you this one, ok?" I said, trying to recover."Just one last station!" The trainer shouted through the speakers.
Station 5 was just holding a plank. That's it. For as long as you can. Brutal way to end class.The coach came over to us as we got ready for the endless plank. "Since you guys are the only ones at this station, face each other and tap opposite hands alternating while you're in the plank. Just a little extra challenge since you're both crushing this class."
We looked at each other like "what the hell.""You wanna try it?" I said."Yeah, let's do it." She replied, determined.We got into cat/cow, heads facing each other as we waited for the buzzer to launch us into planks.We glanced up at each other and the buzzer rang. Up we went.The first minute was hard but doable. We tapped opposite hands every couple seconds, our sweat and calluses encouraging each other.
The second minute our arms were shaking like crazy, our high-fives slowing down, but neither one of us wanting to be the first to fall out of the plank.
"Fuck." I said."I can't hold this much longer" she got out through gritted teeth.We glanced up at each other and for ten more seconds held on until we both collapsed to the floor at the same time, our chests heaving, covered in sweat, arms numb."Come on, guys! Stay in it!" The coach yelled.
We both laughed a bit and tried without success to get back into a plank one last time. The buzzer went off and class was over. The music slowly decrescendoed and as the coach moved us into stretches, the two of us were still a heaving mess on the floor.
After a minute of laying on the turf floor, we pushed ourselves to our hands and knees.
"I'm Bri, by the way." She said.
"Oh shit. Right. I'm Finn. Nice to meet you."
We both stood up and grabbed our water bottles.
"Are you usually at the 10am?" Bri asked.
"9 or 10, I guess. I basically go whenever I'm free. I'm new though. Just here visiting my mom while she's in the hospital."
"Oh, I'm sorry. That sucks."
"Yeah. She's getting good care, at least."
"That's good. How long are you in town for?"