Frank would never know. She suspected he perhaps had entertained years ago she was attracted to him, but they were both married. What Frank doesn't know won't hurt him, or his lovely wife. Regardless, she'd recently run into the couple again at a rather unfortunate time, during a funeral.
Respectful as always, she played low key, and was there for the purpose of paying respect to her friend's Mother. However, seeing Frank again, gave her a bit of a thrill, which she tucked back where it belonged under the circumstances.
As life would have it, she had been widowed in the past, but Frank remained married. And to someone who would never 'get it' or comprehend Divine Sex, openness, and how normal it all was. As long as people are authentic, respectful, loving and do not desire to hurt another person, consensual sex, private lovers and sensuality is something God allows. Its a total shame too, that most church goers base their idea of a 'sin' on personal preference, tradition or personal revulsion rather than on what the Bible really says. According to Philos Thelos, anyway.
She got it. So did her loving husband. Grace, freedom, erotica, sexuality. It truly was all good. Women who think they own their spouses, are just as guilty as the men who abuse theirs. It's a control thing because deep down, she is insecure in the deepest recesses of her soul, and the need for control of their relationships is key to feeling confident. She knew about his wife. She had a good friend who had worked at the private school they'd sent their children too. "Difficult, demanding, controlling" was how the staff there frequently described Frank K.'s wife. They tired of her quickly.
She suspected Frank's wife was not one to live a healthy and vibrant sexual life, and had hang ups. Once when she'd been at their house to visit there was a book out about husband's and porn. Geesh. When are folks going to learn that A) viewing nudity was the original way things were in the Garden of Eden and B) Heaven won't have 'marriages or giving in marriage'. Everyone will be free to be sexual. At least that was her interpretation of living in a constant state of Grace. God made sexual pleasure. And she liked sex and pleasure.
All she knew was, Frank K. was hot, and she longed to taste his lips and have a night of passion between the two of them. She never would, and he would never know, and it is what it is...but her mind did wander...so did his....Funny how they wandered together....
Frank was driving in to work at the nuclear site. He had a 70's station on, and suddenly Bread began crooning "I Want To Make It With You". Yeah right.
Frank was lost in thought. He was getting tired. He loved his wife, but he was so tired of her controlling issues. And of not having near enough sex that he wanted. He was a healthy male, with a very healthy sexual appetite. He didn't know how to talk to Janie about all this. She would flip out, her heart would break, and she'd never understand his deep desire for a passionate marriage. Janie's father had recently died, and it was touch and go lately. While he had compassion for her, and loved her very much, he had some major desires that continued to be put on the back burner in life.
His thoughts as the song flowed on careened where they always did. Straight to thoughts of Chris. He saw her at the funeral, she looked great. He knew she had remarried, he was happy for her. He had given her a hug - he didn't know what had come over him, but he leaned in and asked her for another one. She obliged, giving him a second brief and platonic hug. He wondered if she knew he was attracted to her.
Once,years ago in the heat of the moment, after she had teased him about seeing him with his shirt off years ago, he stood right in front of his wife and Chris, ripped off his shirt and put on a shirt she had gotten him for his birthday, to see her reaction. Jeanie was shocked, Chris seemed to give him the kudos for acknowledging their little flirtation. And that's all it was really, nothing more.
Still, he found himself in life in the same boat as many men do. Up shit creek without a paddle because he wasn't getting sex nearly as much as he wanted to be having it. And Jeanie was not one to be open in these areas. He reflected on the FAQ that Chris lived five hours away from him and this was a good thing. Wasn't it?
He did have to make a trip her direction in another month...he let his mind wander further...
He was in town for a week long meeting- work related. And was eating dinner alone when he saw Chris come into the restaurant with a few books and her iPAD. Waiting until she settled into a booth seat, he took her in longingly.
She had on a long black and white skirt, a sexy shirt and a beautiful necklace that accented the entire outfit, her hair was getting longer and she'd colored it from a lighter red to a dark chestnut. Those beautiful hazel almond shaped eyes were focused on something on her iPAD.
His cock tingled. And rushing guilt shot a jolt through him. "Dammit" he muttered under his breath. He was a good guy. Good people was he and he didn't want to go messing his life up. He got up, his jeans feeling a bit tighter than usual, and headed her direction. "Hi" he said.
She jumped, and looked up into his face. "Frank!, what are you doing here?" "In town for work training". "Oh? Where's Jeanie" "Home with the boys, can I sit?" "Sure", Chris looked a bit nervous. He was too.
In her gregarious way, she proceeded to engage him in intelligent conversation, authentic and always, loving. He was drawn to her. Drawn to her love of life, her beautiful eyes, her skin pink and glowing. He wiggled his lower half to adjust.
And then he went for it, shocking her to her core. "I want to talk to you, about something pretty serious, can we keep it confidential?"
"Okayyyy, yeah, sure" she replied, a little wary now.
"Is Jeanie OK? Is something wrong?" "No, no, everything is fine." He hesitated, his hands shaking: "Chris, I like you. I mean, I like you as in I'm attracted to you. I've known you for 20 years, and I've given up the fight. If I wasn't married, if I were free, and you were free, I'd want you". Her mouth dropped. A fly could have worked its way in and had fun in the playground.