Chapter 1
All in a Day's Work
I work in an advertising agency as an Account Manager, which is really an up-market title for a salesman. My job is to ensure that the client is happy - happy of course with the advertising we produce for their products, but also happy with the assortment of people who bring that about, happy with the way we handle changes, problems and anything else that they may choose to throw at us. The corollary is of course that I have to keep some of our own 'prima donnas' out of the way of the client, if I want to keep the relationship financially secure that is. Some of our more creative people would happily tell the client where to go and what to do with the product - not because they particularly dislike either you understand, it's simply because some are more interested in the 'art' of advertising, or the opportunity to win an award - and can't stand the average businessman's concern with the 'almighty dollar', even though that's what we are actually hired to produce for them.
So, there is a fair amount of stress involved in the job, always making sure that absolutely everyone is 'happy' with what they are doing - and with everyone else that's involved in doing it!
Most people think of Advertising as a glamour industry, lots of wining, dining, exotic locations with beautiful people - that sort of thing! There is some of that of course but most of the time we are working against dead-lines that are too short, making sure the creative people don't blow the client's annual budget in one month and, of course - always making sure everyone is 'happy'!
Every now and then there is an exciting high point that makes it all seem worthwhile - winning over a new client that you have been working on for months, seeing sales of a product go through the roof after a really successful campaign you have been involved with, getting a nice bonus or a new car because of some combination of events, and occasionally - very, very occasionally, a sexual 'adventure' with one of the 'beautiful people'!
Almost all of the people you see in advertisements work for agents; model agencies that specialise in providing people, or even parts of people - hair, hands, legs, eyes, teeth, you name it and there'll be someone who specialises in just that - of all shapes, sizes types and ages. We advise the client as to the type of person we believe is needed for a given advertisement, if they agree, the agency sends us a few that fit that profile so we can make the final selection.
The people that have been in the industry a while tell us that in the early days there used to be a fair bit of use of the 'casting couch' - but there's hardly any of that these days, not that I know of anyway. Not that people don't end up in bed together, but not usually for the sake of getting a particular job - or so I used to think!
But throw any group of people together for a time and there are bound to be opportunities - and of course I'm not too slow to take advantage of those, if they happen to come my way. But there was one time when I thought I had 'heaven-on-a-stick', that in fact turned out to be a classic, in advertising parlance, 'sell-job' - and which ended with an interesting finale!
We were shooting a TV commercial for one of our major clients, part of a completely new campaign for them, so it was important that we got it right. The commercial included a bevy of beach girls so, what with the crew from the production house, the support staff, we agency people, the representatives from the client and the usual, assorted hangers-on, there was a large group of us and, as we needed a large area of uncrowded beach for the key parts of the commercial we had gone North and taken over a small motel for a few days.
The odd thing about TV is that it adds a couple of kilos to anyone's apparent weight, so those, slim, sylph-like girls you see on your screens are more likely to be skinny or positively scrawny in the flesh. But one of the girls on this shoot was in fact a real stunner, a typical 'California Girl' - long legs, terrific bum, great boobs, big eyes and teeth and lots of hair - you know the type, you see them on TV every day. But you never, ever actually meet one on the street, do you?
Well, there she was - Sandy - and let me tell you, she looked fantastic! Fantastic and sexy - so sexy that I soon found that just watching her scampering about in a bikini, even from a fair distance, gave me the start of a hard-on - and I guess I was no different to every other hetero male there. Most girls I have seen who have that kind of figure and looks get so used to guys falling all over each other to get at them that they end up being totally conceited and self-centred - but Sandy didn't come across like that at all. She was fun, joined in whatever was going on at the time, laughed and joked with the rest of us during the breaks and, at the end of the day seemed quite happy to join in with the general relaxing around the bar before dinner. She had a really happy personality, to go with a simply incredible body - too good to be true!
I was, as always flat-out making sure everything was going according to schedule and budget - and that everyone was 'happy' - but still found time to watch with interest from the sidelines as one by one the men made their plays for her. Each one of them was unsuccessful, but she seemed to handle each situation quite brilliantly, giving a very definite 'thanks, but no thanks', yet apparently managing not to hurt anyone's feelings or ego in the process.
But then, as often happens, during the second day we ran into a few technical problems, problems that meant I had to drive into the nearest large town to buy or hire some extra equipment and when I got back a couple of hours later I found one of the crew being given first-aid for a nasty bump on the head. It turned out that another of the crew had laid him out, for something he had said to Sandy. We couldn't afford that sort of thing, neither from the purely financial aspect, nor from the potential for disharmony it could set up amongst the rest of the team - and of course it was my job was to make sure everyone was always 'happy'!
So I got the various versions of the story, took the two guys to one side and quite quickly managed to sort them out, which wasn't really that difficult, it had just been 'heat of the moment' stuff between them. Then I took Sandy off the shoot for a while, so I could talk to her too - and it was only when I had closed the door of the caravan we used for changing and make-up behind us, that I realised it was the first time I had actually been alone with her.
She seemed subdued, her usual bright cheerfulness was missing and when I asked her for her version of what had happened I thought she was going to burst into tears. It turned out that the constant pressure from the various guys trying to get off with her, plus the need to concentrate on her part in the commercial - at the same time joining in the fun and trying to be pleasant with everyone - had finally got to her. The guy who had ended up on his back had been making a real nuisance of himself the previous night, when he'd obviously had bit too much to drink and unlike everyone else, just wouldn't take a friendly 'no' as a final answer.
When he had still continued to pester her that morning, she had got upset, lost her concentration and then the director had bawled her out for something and there had been a brief but heated row which had ended up with the guy in question being flattened by the other crew member. Having seen how well Sandy had handled the rest of the men I felt sure that her version was correct and that the guy with the bump had deserved all he had got.
Feeling confident that the fracas was now all over and trying to help her back to her normal, cheerful self I said to her. 'Just concentrate on your work during the day - enjoy yourself with the rest of us this evening - I'm sure you won't have any more trouble from that guy, apart from having a roaring headache I'm sure he's feeling really embarrassed about the whole thing Sandy.'
But she looked downcast and it was obvious that something was still bothering her, her voice was subdued and her eyes remained fixed on a point on the floor between us as she replied. 'It's always the same, I do nothing and it's always the wrong men that make a nuisance of themselves - never the right one.' she added.
I had no idea what she meant - and said so, she answered but she still didn't look me in the eye as she spoke. 'I must have had seven or eight offers, in less than two days, some blatant, some implied - but, the one who does interest me has hardly said a word to me.'
She paused and then looked directly up into my eyes. Hers were a brilliant cornflower-blue and they seemed to bore right through me.
