I'm nervous: Terribly nervous. I'm about to meet my first date of 20 years. This new person is about to walk into my life. I think on the thrill of possible outcomes: The fear of possible rejection. In reality it was always rare for me to ask anyone out, but that's not saying I'm inexperienced: The contrary, but it's just been a long, long time. I sit here waiting by the plush marble and rose wood elevators. I know the girl who's coming now but I feel the butterflies of this inevitable and strange experience.
I've chosen our rendezvous carefully, an elegant, discrete hotel. Neither of us have space or privacy in our lives. My date lives at home and I'm relying on friends as I work through a difficult divorce. So I planned this; A wonderful spa hotel, easy to excuse, with no terrifying fallout if our experiment fails to spark chemistry. A movie meeting that doesn't happen in our real lives.
We met months ago. In a strange mix of luck and, well, just pure blind luck. It was a not so innocent message to a beautiful girl. I wanted to talk to her, turn her on. She is an unreachable, unobtainable, beautiful woman, posting on GW, popular on GW. Somehow our stilted conversation progressed to KiK, as if by chance. Just a few PMs and she gave me her username. Her first response to my profile was "How old are you?", "42" I lied in the hope a 10% decrease in my age would make any difference. I asked her the same: "20" she lied back. And then we hit it off. We talked, and talked, all the time, making each other laugh. We sexted: Intimate sexting with flagrant sensuality and a match of erotic desires. We exchanged numbers. We both obviously had others to talk to, a list of online potential dates. Both of us had a whole evening of entertainment in our phones. Now though we Facetimed. My online time narrowed. I found myself spending all my free time talking to her. Then we agreed to meet.
Now I'm here, at this crossroads, watching the elevators, anxiously waiting, watching the time move so slowly it would mystify Hawkins. Then she's here, and time stops. She texted me when she arrived. The elevator opens, and I sit up, expectant of her. To my disappointment it's a couple, who look at me strangely, maybe seeing my flash of annoyance. A few seconds later the other elevator opens and she steps out.
My first response took me by surprise. God she is breathtaking online, but in person? She's just stunningly beautiful, delicate, petite, fine china bones, confident in her movement in her tight, flighty and short dress. She is a girl that stops a room. That girl, the one we all want. I want her. I want her as soon as I see her. She smiles and I stand up, nervously kiss her cheek and guide her to our room.
"So I get there and he greets me at the elevator and I'm very pleasantly surprised. He was a lot taller than I expected, and not fat at all. He looked very well put together. He hugged me and kissed my cheek. I'm still fucking nervous at this point and almost quivering. He starts walking me to the room and I'm focusing on my walking and so we go into the room and it's very nice!"