There's quite a large park fairly close to where I live. One fine afternoon I was at a loose end and happened to wander down to the park, running into Dave, a casual friend of mine. We just bummed around the park for a while, doing nothing but enjoying the fresh air and the sunshine. After a while Dave nudged me.
"Hey, Neil, instead of just hanging around here why don't we wander over to the jogging track. You can see some interesting sights jogging along at times."
"True, that, but you can also see some horrendous sights. Still, the odds are in our favour. Let's go."
The jogging track is quite a long one, a couple of kilometres at least, and it wanders through the park like the track made by a drunken snake. Dave and I finished up propped against a tree where the track ran past this small grove.
There weren't many pickings for our optical delights. Several reasonably attractive young ladies who we dutifully admired, some not so attractive women we somehow missed seeing, and a real cow of a woman who rudely commented as she waddled past. We didn't reply for fear that she might stop and talk some more, a horrifying thought.
"Whoa. Coming up at nine o'clock," said Dave and my head swivelled to the left. I immediately straightened up, wishing for a comb and hoping I looked at least a little presentable.
I recognised the young lady jogging towards us. Her name was Danielle, she was eighteen, just a little bit younger than Dave and me, and she was sensational. She was the definition of a blue-eyed blonde, stacked, shapely hips, fit (observe the jogging), and wildly popular with all the boys (and I mean all). Come to think of it this was probably the first time I've seen her out without two or three boys hanging around.
She was wearing Lycra shorts and top and I'm sure she'd have been arrested if she'd been wearing that outfit anywhere but on the track. The most fascinating thing about her right now was the way her breasts were bouncing around under her top as she jogged. Imagine a couple of puppies fighting under a blanket and you get the idea. (Quite large puppies, too.)
I moved onto the track, holding up my hand in a stop sign. Danielle slowed down and came to a halt in front of me, jogging on the spot.
"Danielle," I greeted her. "How lovely to see you."
She smiled and said my name, showing that she at least knew who I was. Dave promptly thumped me on the arm and I gave him a nasty look and sighed.
"Oh, yes. Manners," I grumped. "This loser is Dave."
"Loser? What makes me a loser?"
"You didn't know Danielle," I said promptly at the same time as Danielle piped up and said, "You hang out with Neil."
Okay, so I scored one off Dave but Danielle scored on both of us. Marks to her, I guess.
"So where's your entourage, today?" I asked. "Normally they cluster around you like fleas on a rabbit."
"Well, the boys who decided to go jogging are somewhere behind me, staggering around. They couldn't keep up with me."
"Few can," I conceded, and then sighed. "Danielle, can you please stop jogging for a minute and give those poor puppies a rest. Dave is getting dizzy trying to watch them."
Danielle laughed and stood still. After a few moments her puppies bounced to a halt.
"Are you trying to say you weren't watching?" griped Dave.
"Certainly not. I have better manners than that."
Both Danielle and Dave sniggered at that. I suppose I might have been keeping one eye on them, just in case they escaped their confines.
"Park history lesson," I said. "See this little grove of trees? Well, last winter there was a lightning strike in the middle of it that took out a few trees. The gardeners cleared away the remains but didn't plant any new trees. They just tossed down some turf, leaving a nice little lawn in the middle of the grove."
"That's fascinating information," Danielle said, "but why are you telling me this."
"Because I want you to step past these trees with me so you can observe this nice little lawn for yourself. Once you see it you'll realise what a great idea it will be for me to lay you on the turf so the sun is shining on you. That accomplished I will proceed to kiss you and make gentle love to you, letting you enjoy nature to its fullest."
I smiled happily at her, waiting for her reply.
"Why, Neil, this is so sudden," she said, rolling her eyes.
"Not really. I've been trying to catch you for a while but you always seem to have a string of idiots hanging around. This is the first time I've caught you alone."
"We're not exactly alone," Danielle pointed out and I glanced over at Dave.
"We will be," I said, "and Dave doesn't count anyway. He's gay."
"News to me," muttered Dave, and Danielle giggled.
"I think I'm superfluous to requirements right now. Catch you later."
In true gentlemanly manner Dave faded out of the scene.
"Now, I believe we were going this way," I said, my hand cupping Danielle's elbow and turning her towards the grove and the little path I knew of.
"Hey, I didn't agree to anything," protested Danielle.
"Of course you did. I mean, really, you only had two options, yes or no. Knowing that you're a very decisive person if you'd intended to say no you'd have said so, loud and clear. You didn't so you obviously intended to say yes."
"That is rather specious and self-serving reasoning," Danielle stated, but she didn't pull away, slipping past the trees with me until we reached that little patch of lawn.
"Actually, this is quite nice," she said. "It's quiet and peaceful and private."
