My Straight Best Friend Ch 01

This is the first chapter of what I'm expecting will be at least a four part story. Although it's published in the First Time category, there will be no actual PIV sex until future chapters, as the characters are building towards losing virginity in what I'm hoping comes across as a realistic way. But there's still loads of sexual activity in this one to keep your interest.

Thanks as always to RawSilhouette for being the muse and for always picking up when I haven't quite made my point, to Ravenna933 for her insights into word choice that made the story stronger, and to SpotintheSand for being such a great ideas man. Read his story The Scavenger Hunt when you finish this one, if you haven't already.

All characters are over the age of 18.

I stared at the blinking ICQ message on my computer screen, understanding each word and yet unable to make my brain comprehend their meaning. My heart was racing in my chest.

I'm having a sleepover this weekend with the usual group of girls. Do you want to come?

I don't know how long I stared at the message from Allie Wang, but it must have been a while, because eventually there was another one:

Justin? Are you still there?

Sure,

I wrote back as my brain gradually returned to Earth.

Let me clear it with my parents, but then yeah, sounds good.

You're 18 now, do you really need their permission? :P

Allie teased.

As long as I'm under their roof, then it's probably better that I do. And it's okay with your Mom if I sleep over?

Oh sure, she trusts you.

Allie and I had known each other since we were born, eight days apart in the spring of 1982 - our Moms had met at Lamaze classes together - and she had been my childhood best friend until we drifted apart during the "girls/boys are icky" preteen years, for those and other reasons. But since high school had started, we'd become close friends again.

We all were in our grade 13 year, or 'OAC' as it was then known in Ontario. The provincial government was already making plans to phase out five-year high school a few years down the road, but for us, our high school graduation wasn't expected until we were mostly 19, next June. For now, it was a couple of weeks into the new school year, late September in the year 2000.

I didn't know who the "usual group of girls" was in this case, but I assumed it included Mia Tyler, a boisterous, confident personality whose boisterous confidence had always intimidated the hell out of me. I assumed it included Shauna Day, a quiet, beautiful blonde whom I knew from being lab partners last year in Chemistry. I'd long admired her pretty face and spectacular body from afar, but I'd never really had the chance to get to know her, and besides, I knew she was a Christian, presumably off-limits for dating. And I hoped it included Emma Desmarais, the girl of my dreams, a petite brunette with a mischievous sparkle in her eye, a brainiac who also had good looks and social skills. I'd had a secret crush on her since the first day of high school.

And now I was going for a sleepover with them. I could hardly believe my luck. I noticed my best friend Eric was online, so I decided to message him, partially to gloat, if nothing else.

So guess who's going for a sleepover with some of the prettiest girls in school?

I asked.

Really? You?

I sent back a smug-faced emoticon.

Can you call me?

he wrote back.

I said goodbye to Allie, disconnected the modem and then picked up the phone, dialing his number. Eric picked up right away.

I gloated my way through the story. "The only thing I can't figure out is why," I finally finished. "Like I know Allie and I have been friends forever, but why are they so okay with having a guy over at their girls' night? What are they expecting is going to happen? Maybe this is finally going to lead to a first kiss? Or more?"

Eric sounded surprised. "You want to kiss a girl? Or more?"

"Yeah?" I was confused. "Why wouldn't I?"

He took a deep breath. "I swore I would never tell you this."

"What?"

"The whole school thinks you're gay."

***

I don't know how long I spaced out for, but eventually my vision returned and I realized I was holding the phone down by my waist. I picked it up and put it back to my ear.

"W-what?" I stammered again.

"Justin, the whole school thinks you're gay."

"Why? How?"

"Well, let's start at the beginning. You've never had a girlfriend."

"Not by choice," I interrupted.

"You never join in with ogling the girls. The guys around the school talk about Mia's latest low-cut top or share stories about what third base is like, and you never join in."

"I respect women! I never felt comfortable discussing who was easy, or who gave the best blowjob. That kind of locker room talk just always turned me off, not that I ever had anything to contribute, anyway."

"But you never show

any

interest. You don't flirt with girls. You don't talk about girls. You have a few female friends, but you've never even come close to making a move on anyone."

"I'm just... shy, I guess." I sighed.

"Right. But I mean, look at you. You dress well, you keep neat. Your hair is always perfect. Other guys around the school live in t-shirts and cargo pants, and you don't even own a pair of jeans."

"It's not my fault my Mom owns a men's wear store!"

"Justin, you have a skin-care routine!"

"I like looking good!" I was getting defensive now.

"I'm your only real guy friend!"

"Okay?"

"So you're a well-dressed, reasonably good-looking guy who isn't interested in sports or cars or any traditional guy stuff. You relate better to girls than to boys, and you're super repressed and secretive about your sexuality. What conclusion did you expect people to draw about you?"

"It's not like anyone's ever made fun of me for it!" I pointed out. "Shouldn't people around school be calling me a homo or something, if that's what they think?"

"You're upset that your classmates are respectful? You're the quiet, smart kid who keeps to himself, but you've got self-confidence and you stand up for yourself. You're not an easy target, so people leave you alone. You've never really been bullied, right?"

"Not since I was a kid."

"So who's going to call you a fairy? People mostly like you at school, anyway. You're not Mr Popular, but you're definitely not unpopular."

"Do you think I'm gay?" I wasn't sure I wanted to know.

"Are you?"

"No!"

Eric sighed heavily on the phone. "I've always thought you probably were gay. I was never 100% certain."

"I don't believe this." My heart was in my throat and I felt faint. I grabbed one of the kitchen chairs and made myself sit down, wrapping the phone cord around my fingers. "Why did you think that?"

"Because despite how close we are, we've never talked about girls. And it's not for my lack of trying. When Caitlin and I were dating in the springtime, I tried to tell you all about our relationship and sexual milestones, and you never really seemed interested. Other guys always wanted to know about how far we'd gone, etc. You never seemed to care. I could tell my telling you about getting to second base made you uncomfortable, so I stopped telling you."

"I just... you guys had the right to privacy," I mumbled.

"Privacy is about respecting boundaries. I

wanted

to share with you. I could have used my best friend's insight about her, since you've always related to girls better than I have. But you would just change the subject. If you aren't gay, then you're certainly a closeted heterosexual."

I considered this. I'd never let anyone see my sexuality. I didn't even really know why. It just seemed... I don't know, private.

"If you're straight," Eric interrupted my train of thought, "then who do you think has the nicest tits in our grade?"

Shauna Day,

my brain instantly thought, as I involuntarily remembered the time she squeezed past me in the row behind where I was sitting in the auditorium, accidentally brushing both of those supple, firm breasts hard against the back of my head as I sat in the row in front. I'd jerked off to that memory for months. "I don't want to talk about it," my mouth said.

"See?"

A horrible sense of realization washed over me.

Fucking hell, I can see it. I don't want to, but I can.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I finally asked quietly.

"Because if you were gay, then it's not my place to out you. You have the right to the time and space to come out of the closet on your own terms. And if you're not gay, well, I figured you'd be mortified to find out that people thought you were."

"I

am

mortified. How am I supposed to go back to school like this on Monday?"

"Justin, remember. Nothing has changed. You're still you. All that's different is that you're aware of how you're perceived. You can use that to your advantage."

"What do you mean?"

"Do you think Allie would have invited a single straight dude to a girls' sleepover? Do you think her Mom would have approved of that, even if Allie was somehow fine with it?"

"That's... that's a point." For the first time since the start of the conversation, I allowed myself a bit of a smile.

"You can totally play this to your advantage. You've been given a great gift here. The girls at school all love you, and so do their parents. You're neat and well-dressed and polite and respectful. You're easy to trust, since you come across so harmlessly. Besides, everyone at school is going to respect your being in the closet if you portray yourself that way. They're not going to pressure you into anything, even if their key assumption about you is wrong. So you can go undercover. Maybe some girls will change in front of you."

I felt a slight rush of excitement between my legs.

Maybe they will.

"Okay. Thanks for levelling with me," I finally said.

"Any time. That's what friends are for."

"You really thought I was gay?" I asked again.

"I was like 75% yes, 25% no. But the 25% probably guessed you were asexual."

"I'm definitely not asexual."

"No?"

A long pause hung between us.

"Shauna has the nicest tits in our grade," I finally mumbled sheepishly. I felt my face getting hot.

"Well, no shit she does," Eric said matter-of-factly. "Ever jerk off thinking about her?"

My face grew redder still. "Sometimes."

"Me too, along with every other straight guy in our grade. I guess that means you're really not gay, huh?"

"I think I'd know."

"Well, you're in a really good spot here, Justin. You're going to get to be these girls' straight, gay best friend."

"Christ."

"Promise me you'll tell me everything, okay? I want to hear some secrets afterwards."

"Within reason, sure."

We lingered on the phone for another few minutes before I hung up. My head was still spinning from finding out how I was perceived. Then, a horrible sinking feeling came over me.

What if my parents think I'm gay, too?

I was the youngest of three kids, with two older sisters, and I remembered distinctly how strict my parents had been with Annette and Carly when they were first having boyfriends over. Doors had to be left open, they couldn't be left alone for any length of time, and there certainly wouldn't have been any mixed-gender sleepovers.

Mom was working at the store today, but Dad was home, tinkering with his car in the garage. His 1968 Triumph Spitfire was his absolute pride and joy, and I knew how much it bothered him that his only son had never taken an interest in it. I may not have been gay, but I definitely wasn't a manly-man type the way that he was.

"Hey, Dad," I called out as I went to him. "Do you mind if I sleep over with a bunch of girls at Allie's next Friday night?"

Dad shrugged without looking up from his engine. "I've got no problem with it."

"What about Mom?"

"I'll ask her just to be sure, but I can't imagine she'd care, either. Knock yourself out, kiddo."

"OK, thanks."

Well, fuck.

I retreated to my room, locking the door behind me. I'd always envied the guys in my grade who could smooth-talk the girls, who dated a lot and slept around. I wasn't socially awkward, at least. I had female friends and I had always related well to girls - better than I related to other boys, for what it's worth - but I'd never figured out the trick in converting someone to a girlfriend. The girls at school treated me like a trusted kid brother, not a sex object to be lusted after. If any girl I knew had ever had sexual thoughts about me, I certainly wasn't aware of it.

With zero sexual experience in my pocket, not even a kiss, I didn't even know if I wanted to sleep around, but I definitely wanted to finally get myself off the mark. I'd never known what I was doing, but apparently doing nothing at all had made the school come to their own conclusions about me. Now that I knew, I was determined to change my reputation. The girls weren't going to try to date a guy they thought was gay, after all, so I knew I had to change their minds somehow.

But I also thought back on Eric's words - being trusted enough to be invited to a girls' night was a privilege for a straight guy, and I had to make sure I didn't fuck it up. Despite having mostly female friends, I never had had any of those sexual conversations with girls, either, and they certainly hadn't attempted to have them with me.

I decided right then and there that I wasn't going to lie to anyone. Letting them come to their own conclusions about me was one thing, but I knew that being deliberately deceitful could open up its own can of worms, as well as likely ruining any chance I might have of getting with Emma. I could maybe change her mind about me, but not if I started off by lying to her.

I started picturing Emma, wondering what she looked like naked, thinking about sex, and I quickly became hard. I jerked off quickly, cumming into my hand after a few minutes. As I lay there after cleaning up, I realized that it was true that I'd never let another living soul see even a tiny glimpse into my sexuality. I'd never been able to relax and be one of the guys at school, and I could understand, much as I didn't want to believe it, why the entire school apparently thought I was something I wasn't.

I had the opportunity to change my own narrative now that I understood what it was. The first four years of high school had passed without a single sexual experience to look back on. I promised myself that my fifth and final year was going to be different.

And I had a sleepover to look forward to.

***

I didn't see or talk to anyone from school for the rest of the weekend. Allie Wang was in my third period history class with Mrs. Murchison, and when it ended, we headed down to the cafeteria for lunch.

As we sat facing each other, I thought back on my longstanding friendship with her. Allie and I had grown up having play dates as our parents would get us together frequently - they'd sit and have tea or coffee while we played in the basement with Lego or had

Blades of Steel

tournaments on the Nintendo. We hadn't gone to the same primary school, so getting to see her on weekends every couple of months was always a treat.

She'd been a tomboy as a child, and growing up with two older sisters had left a bit of a feminine impression on me, so we always got along well in that sense, with our friendship meeting nicely in the middle of a stereotypical boy or girl friendship.

Our childhood friendship had ended when her father had died in a car accident when she was nine. It was around that time we'd started drifting apart, as Allie's mom had pushed away a lot of people during her period of grief. The family play dates had stopped for a couple of years, but we wound up in the same homeroom at the same school starting in grade 9 and had quickly become friends again. Allie's mom had eventually started dating again, and she had a long-term steady boyfriend now, but widowed mother and only daughter were still inseparable.

Despite, or maybe because of, knowing her for so long, she was one of the very few girls in my grade that I hadn't ever thought about sexually. We had known each other for too long, were too close, and although I didn't know what it was that made a girl into girlfriend material, I didn't think of her as that, any more than I could have one of my sisters.

But, as I watched her demolishing a cheeseburger and fries across the table at lunch, I could at least admit to myself she was cute. She was of Chinese heritage, and she wore her black wavy hair relatively short. She was somewhat heavyset, with wide hips and a big rack, and dressed conservatively, always with homemade jewellery. She was one of the very few people at school that I trusted completely.

And apparently she also thought I was gay, or else she wouldn't have invited me for a sleepover with a bunch of girls.

Right?

"So what's the plan for Friday night?" I asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Come any time after supper," she replied. "We usually put pj's on early, throw a movie or two on, gorge on snack food. It'll be fun."

"Do I need to bring anything?"

"Change of clothes, pj's, that's about it. If you have a sleeping bag you can bring it, but if you don't we have extras."

"I've got one, thanks. And who's coming?"

"Mia, Shauna, and Emma. And you."

I tried very hard not to show a reaction, but inside my heart started racing.

Emma was coming.

"It's an honour to be invited," I finally squeaked.

"Pfft, it's nothing. I don't know why we didn't invite you years ago. We've been doing this sleepover thing for years. You'll fit right in."

I'm one of the girls to them

, I thought.

"Do you know any of them well?" she interrupted my train of thought. "I know our friendship has always been kind of one-on-one."

"Well, Mia I know through you, a little bit. I've always found her intimidating."

"Yeah, a lot of guys feel that way about her," Allie mused. "I've never really understood why. She's just outspoken and blunt and doesn't take shit from people. But somehow, a girl acting that way makes men tongue-tied. If she was a guy, no one would bat an eyelid."

I thought about this for a moment. "You know, you're probably right about that," I finally said.

"I know I am. But whatever. She's great. She likes you, or at least what she knows about you."

"As for Shauna," I continued, "we were lab partners in Mrs. Martin's chemistry class in Grade 11, so I got to know her a little through that. But we never actually became friends or hung out outside of school. I always found her a little bit aloof, and I've never known how to relate to overly religious people."

"She can be aloof. She's an introvert, and she takes a while to warm up to people. But she's not as much of a Jesus freak as you probably think she is. She also likes you just fine, and she's cool with your coming."

"I assumed you'd run my invitation by all three girls."

"Oh, of course. To be honest, we're all just thrilled to finally get to have a mixed-gender sleepover. None of us have boyfriends right now, and I doubt my Mom would let us have boyfriends sleep over anyway. But you're good with everyone."

A few days ago, that comment would have sailed over my head, but now knowing what was behind it, it stung a little.

The whole world really does think I'm gay, huh.

"What about Emma?" I asked.

"Emma doesn't really know you that well, but she's a 'go-with-the-flow' kind of personality. Once she found out the other three of us were fine with it, she was fine, too. You've got our stamp of approval."

"I like Emma, from what I know of her," I ventured. Even saying that much made my heart race a little, admitting I liked her, though I knew Allie wouldn't guess what I really meant.