Well time for the origin story.
As you get older you reflect on the things you have done and will never do. Some times you have good experiences and bad experiences.
I am 7 foot tall and my penis is 14 inches uncircumcised and I think has a girth that can be compared to a decent sized baseball bat. Oh yeah I have 6 pack abs and wavy blond hair and a chiseled jaw that can be described as both rugged and manly.
Seriously though even though this is a story does anyone even believe that is remotely true?
I am an average guy. A bit over weight but not horribly bad. The wavy hair part was true but that was when I was a teenager. It was the most glorious naturally wavy hair. I washed my hair and as soon as I blow dry it it looked like it was professionally styled. By the time I hit 35 I had a bald spot and started getting brush cuts.
(Shrug)
Not much you can do about it. Naturally being overweight and having a bald spot I was not exactly brimming with confidence and did not start dating until I hit my mid 30s. If you ever hear of the movie 40 Year old Virgin it is not a life goal. So I decided to start dating meeting people on Plenty of Fish.
I would become a Plenty of Fisherman.
There was a slight problem. It was 2010 and I was 35. I never dated so obviously I was going into it without ANY experience other then what I have seen in videos and read in books. If I had that colossal meat bat of a penis I would have been set. I would have been able to spray her face and body with such an enormous ejaculation I would make Peter North look tame.
For those that are not in their 40s and 50s back in the 80s there were only about 5 guys in every porn movie. As I remember it was most often Tom Byron, Peter North, and the Hedgehog himself Ron Jeremy. Peter North was well known for making ladies look like they were hit in the face with a bucket of paint. Not that I judge but man that must have been a pain to clean up for a lady.
There is a small bit of set up for this. I was over a friends house and found out escorts worked in my town. I had no clue. I was not naive enough to think they did not exist in my town. I even knew the street they frequented. There was even a Tim Hortons I could go to while I looked. There was a slight problem. Sure there were prostitutes but I was not experienced enough to tell a woman dressed like a prostitute from a woman that actually was a prostitute. So I asked about the escorts. He was a bit shocked I did not know but I was kind of straight laced and face it I knew next to nothing.
After a few days of thinking on it, I went through the yellow pages and found a section and found out the rates. A bit steep but I wanted to have my first time with a lot less pressure. I mentioned it was my first time as a customer and first time period. I can not honestly say it mattered but the lady might have been informed by the person I talked to on the phone.
A short time later she arrived at my house. From what I have been told it is generally 1 hour of her time or until you cum. It was pretty awkward but she was really nice about it. So after the payment was dealt with there was a bit of small talk as we got undressed. I offered foreplay because I wanted to make sure she had a good time. Also I was new to having sex so I had the belief that the more you pleasure the partner you are with the more effort they will put into making you feel good and hopefully more then once.
I am a pretty laid back and polite person. When I was talking to her she probably felt that I was telling the truth about this being my first time and wanted to make it a great experience. Or at least she seemed to have the interest and the patience. It is not very often you get to be the first time of someone so there is kind of an ego boost of being the standard that all future partners will be measured by.
