It was the summer after our freshman year of university. We were driving down that country road with the top down, the wind blowing through my long brown hair while he drove, we didn't have a care in the world. That's what it was like to be young and in love. We didn't think of anyone but each other. We found that old abandoned farm and got out, walking around the property and setting up the picnic in the empty field. No neighbors around for miles it was like we were the only people alive! We ate and laughed and lounged around on the grass talking about our hopes and dreams for the future.
Soon the darkness of night was settling in around us and we gathered our things and headed for the car, put the top up and got in but the car wouldn't start. We kept trying but nothing would work. We grabbed the flashlight and explored inside the barn looking to see if there is anything we can use but we found nothing. Our cells were out of range and no home close by. We laughed it off and decided to sleep inside the barn with the blanket from the picnic.
We get inside and find the safest looking spot in the barn and set our things to get comfy. Lying down he pulls me close to him and whispers in my ear that since we're alone maybe now is the time we make love for the first time. I was nervous and a little scared but I loved him so much and I knew that I wanted my first time to be with him. He assured me he had condoms with him, that since we started discussing sex he kept some with him just in case. I still wasn't sure but he assured me we would take it slow and if it didn't feel right we wouldn't go through with it. I knew I could trust him to respect my decision if I changed my mind so I agreed.
We laid there kissing and I remember so well how everything smelled. The air was so crisp and warm, it smelled of the grass, trees, flowers and the wild honeysuckle that grew thickly all around the barn. I could smell the old hay that was still around inside the barn. In the distance I could faintly smell the salt water from the ocean. Yet the smell I remember the best was the way he smelled. Oh how I loved the way he smelled. This mixture of soap, shampoo, deodorant and cologne. I inhaled deeply wanting that smell to burn into my memory, and it did. All these years later and I still remember it like it was that night in that barn.
His hands roaming over my body so soft and gentle. I remember shivering from his touch, and he asked me if I was cold. I laughed slightly from nerves and told him that I wasn't. He smiled at me and leaned in and kissed me while unbuttoning my shirt. I cautiously let my hands move up his arms to wrap around him. Why was I so nervous? We've kissed and fooled around a lot. So why now am I so nervous to touch him?
There was a warm breeze blowing in through the cracks in the walls, he held me close his hand resting on my stomach while his other hand tilted my chin up towards his mouth. For some reason I felt bolder now and allowed my hands to lift his shirt off of him and set it aside.
I remember it like it was yesterday, the way his fingers danced along my skin, the way the moonlight shone through the cracks in the walls and the door that wouldn't close all the way. Not a sound to be heard around us except a distant bird. The wind was barely blowing and it was as if time stood still. Like the universe wanted us to have this perfect moment to always remember.
He slid my shirt off, leaned down and kissed down my neck and chest. I took a breath in and held it for a moment when he did that. Then he kissed his way back up and whispered into my ear.
"I love you."
