A Different Perspective

I couldn't believe I kissed Travis. I really couldn't believe that he was kissing me back. I thought I was going to drop dead of joy right there. Seriously, I thought my heart was going to give out. We kissed, and we kissed some more, and he had one hand on the spot between my neck and my shoulder, and the other was on my waist. My hands were in his hair, on his shoulders, touching him. I was in heaven. I don't know who moaned, I actually think it was him, but I couldn't be sure.

We finally broke apart, but our hands were still on each other, and our lips were just inches apart. We were both breathing heavily. Oh, sweet heaven.

"Travis," I whispered, not really intending to go anywhere with that; I just wanted to say his name, to hear it from my lips. He kissed me then, hard, and we started making out again. Gradually, we both leaned back against the couch, still kissing, and it mellowed into long, deep kisses. Our hands both explored, but both of us stayed above the belt. Personally, I was dying. My dick could have pounded nails. I hoped Travis was in the same way.

Then we broke off again, panting.

"Do you want to..." Travis began, staring at my lips. I nodded furiously, and we both stood up. I followed him to his bedroom. He turned toward me when he got to the bed, and we were kissing again. I had to tilt my head down; I had six inches on him. I grabbed at his shirt, he grabbed at mine. Then I was unbuttoning his pants and he unbuttoned mine, and before I could free him from his pants, he was pulling down my pants and kneeling. He looked up at me, and my heart melted. Long, dark lashes framed his pale gray eyes, the pupils dilated with desire, and his dark lips were parted. Then he focused on my cock, but he didn't put his mouth on it. Oh, but I did love to be teased. He buried his face in my pubes, and bent to suck on my balls. Oddly, I've only had one boyfriend who ever did that, and it was glorious. It was even better with Travis doing it. He took one in his mouth, and then the other, gently rolling them around and sucking gently. Glorious, heaven, wonderful. I moaned his name, and he released my nut. He kissed his way up to my cock, and licked the head once before sliding his lips over the head.

He sucked, and he licked, and I moaned. Then, he stopped. I gasped at the cold air on my wet cock. Standing up, Travis shucked off his pants and pushed me back on the bed. I took the opportunity to pull him forward by the hips and taste his cock. It was nestled in a bed of black pubes, nearly six inches of perfection. Thick, slightly curved. Definitely perfect. I moaned on his cock, which made him moan. Suddenly, he pushed me away. I scooted back on the bed, and he crawled after me. We were kissing, and grabbing, but I felt like he was holding back. Hmm.

"Do you..." he started, but he seemed embarrassed.

"What? What do you want?" I whispered in his ear.

"Do you like anal?" he asked quietly. I froze for a moment, but... even though I'm not a huge fan of bottoming, the thought of Travis on top of me, inside of me, made my cock twitch. No, I had no problem with bottoming for Travis. So, I nodded.

"I want you so bad," he moaned, then he made an odd noise. "Oh... I don't have condoms."

"Oh," I said, disappointed. Neither did I. "Uh, I'm clean, though."

I have never had sex without condoms. I've never dated anyone long enough to really get to that point. I do, however, get tested regularly, and I knew Travis had been tested. He nodded, and we both started moving. Leaning over, he opened up a drawer next to his bed and took out a bottle of lube. He hesitated, looking from me to the bottle. Finally, he handed it to me. I took it, but just looked at it. Travis wanted me to get myself ready? It seemed kind of... rude. Impersonal. I wasn't sure what to do.

"Want me to do it?" he whispered. I nodded, feeling numb. Was this his bedside manner? Hand me the lube, get myself ready? Maybe he didn't want to do it? What the hell?

Travis took the bottle from my hands, and I lay back, spreading my legs. He squeezed some lube into his hands and rubbed his hands together to warm it up. Then he sat back on his heels and looked at me. His cock stood straight out, and I don't think I've ever seen anything more beautiful. I decided I could deal with his bedside manner.

"Do you want to... oh."

"What's wrong?" I asked. This was suddenly getting weird. I hadn't been this nervous since... hell, probably since my first time. And really, even though I had issues with putting my foot down, I really didn't usually have an issue with simply telling someone what I wanted. Not now! I couldn't bear to tell him what I really wanted...

"Oh, nothing," he answered, but he hesitated. And *blushed*. Fucking adorable.

"Travis..." I said seriously.

"I don't mind topping," he interjected as he leaned forward.

Wait -- what? He doesn't mind?

"You want to bottom?" I asked, excited. "I don't mind."

"It's up to you," he said, suddenly shy. I sat up and kissed him. He was adorable when he was acting shy.

"I prefer topping," I whispered against his lips, "but I don't mind receiving."

"Oh," he sighed. He still seemed shy, but he grabbed my cock with his lubed hands, stroking it and rubbing around my head. Travis started to lay down, and I got on my knees. I grabbed the lube, and put some on my fingers, then lowered my mouth to his cock while my fingers started to probe his ass. The noises that man made... I can't even begin to describe. The man loved his ass played with. It was too good to be true. He moaned and bucked his hips when I slid my finger into his beautiful ass, and I added a second. More moaning, more bucking. He grabbed my hair and pulled me up.

"Keith, please," he moaned against my lips, and I don't think I've ever heard anything sweeter. And who was I to deny the man what he wanted?

Travis started to turn, but I stopped him. I wanted to see his face as I pushed into him. He grabbed his legs, and I positioned myself at his entrance. I pushed, he groaned, I pushed some more. The head of my cock popped in, and he gasped before letting out a loud moan.

"Are you okay?" I asked. He nodded, mouth parted, and I kissed him as I pushed in. He moaned into my mouth, and I could feel him buck his hips beneath me. Hot. So fucking hot. I kissed him some more, staying still, but then he let go of his legs and grabbed my ass, pulling me in until my balls were against his ass. We both let out low moans, and I could feel his ass clench around my cock. I had never barebacked before, and the feeling was amazing. It was unexpected, really. I always thought, how much better could it really be? As it turns out, a hell of a lot better.

We rocked together. It amazed me that his cock was still hard, even after being penetrated. Amazing. His precum was slicking both of our stomachs as I pushed in and pulled out. I was trying to keep it slow and easy, but Travis grabbed my ass again. He wanted fast, and, again -- who was I to deny the man what he wanted? I pounded his ass, and he moaned and squirmed beneath me. Seriously, one of the most beautiful sights I have ever seen. His longish black hair was haloed around his head, his lips were slightly parted, and his face, neck, and chest were flushed. Never in my wildest dreams -- and I had some pretty wild dreams -- had I imagined it being this good. To top it off, he was watching me fuck him. He stared at my face with half-lidded eyes. When I hit a good spot his eyes would close, but then they'd open, and he'd be watching my face as I fucked him. I wanted to fucking scream about how hot he was. I managed to restrain myself. Leaning back, I grabbed his hips and kept going, while he started fisting his own cock. It felt like it went on for a glorious eternity, when suddenly his ass clenched and he inhaled sharply; then, he came over his stomach. I leaned over and kissed him, hard, until I unloaded into his ass. His cum was sticky between us, but I didn't really care. I continued thrusting before I collapsed on top of him. Both of us were panting. Still inside of him, I turned my head and tilted it so I could kiss him. He seemed to welcome my tongue into his mouth.

We kissed until my cock was mostly soft, when I finally pulled out. Travis turned his head to look down, and gave a sleepy chuckle.

"We made a mess," he commented in a (very sexy, I will add) scratchy voice.

"Who is this we? You made the mess," I asked. I propped myself up on my elbow beside him and raised an eyebrow. He raised his head slightly to look at me, and it took me a moment to decipher his look -- he was trying to figure out if I was serious. So, I gave him my best lopsided grin. "It was hot, though."

To my surprise (and delight!) he blushed. My tough Travis, a blushing bottom. Who the hell would have ever figured that?

"I'm going to jump in the shower," he said, smiling a little. I waited until I heard the toilet flush and the shower start before I followed him. The master bath had a nice-sized shower as well as a bathtub. He was in the shower, so I stepped in behind him and wrapping my arms around him. He startled a little, but then leaned his head back against my shoulder as I took the soap from his hand and started washing him. After, he washed me, and we kissed and messed around for a while, before he told me we needed to get out before the hot water ran out.

It was early, but I followed him back to the bed, and curled up behind him.

I found out later night that Travis knew how to deep throat, and that was a wonderful thing. If I'm being completely honest, it wasn't the best blow job I've ever had, but it showed promise, and I'm not going to complain -- he still made the top five on his first try.

The next morning I woke up before him. I was kind of nervous -- what if he wanted me to leave? I slipped out of bed to pee, than decided I'd make breakfast and hope for the best. We had cuddled most of the night, so I figured wasn't going to expect me to just leave. Well, I hoped. I fried some leftover rice in a pan, and was almost done with a couple of eggs over-easy when Travis padded into the kitchen. He stood beside me and looked over the stove.

"I was going to bring it to you," I admitted shyly. He glanced at me sideways, and he was blushing again, but he gave me a small smile. It shouldn't have been news to be, but I realized he was just as nervous as I was. It helped me relax a bit.

After a somewhat-awkward breakfast, we lapsed into casual conversation that was like the way it used to be -- not like it had been the week before, but like it had been a year before, before the stuff with Mark. It was nice. We chatted, and watched a movie on TV, and we actually cuddled a bit. Travis's move, as crazy as that was -- I was too chicken to do it.

Christmas vacation for a school teacher is a wonderful thing. I went home that afternoon, but came back to cook dinner. We spend the next few days in cooking, or watching movies (and cuddling!), or just talking. Or in bed -- lots of time in bed. We didn't really talk about that, though. It just sort of happened. Both of us would initiate at different times, but neither of us brought it up. I discovered Travis was almost a total bottom -- he admitted that he would top, once in a blue moon, but preferred to bottom. He loved to give head. He discovered I loved to top... so we turned out to be very compatible in the sex department. We still didn't discuss, anything, though -- we just let it happen. Naturally, I should have expected that our four day sex-adventure would come to an end.

On the morning of our third day, I woke up after Travis for the first time. I thought I had felt his weight lift from the bed, but I couldn't be sure. I pulled on Travis's extra flannel robe and went to see what he was up to. I paused in the hallway when I heard voices in the living room.

"I don't know," I heard Travis say.

"Have you even thought about this?"

"I don't... no. Not really, no."

"Travis..."

"Eric, stop. It's not..."

"What? It's not what? Serious? Because I'm pretty sure it is."

"Look, that isn't what I was going to say."

"What then? You can't just toy with him, Travis."

"I'm not!"

"But you don't know what you're doing," Eric spat.

"No," Travis said defensively, "But that doesn't mean I'm toying with him. Maybe he's toying with me!"

"Travis," Eric sighed, "I don't think he's toying with you, and I really think you're intentionally toying with him, but... well, both of you are on the rebound... and have you thought about how he feels?"

"What are you talking about?"

"He... well, he's had a thing for you for years."

"You're -- what?" Travis had started to say something, but what Eric said stopped him. I felt my blood run cold. So, I did what anyone would have done. I backed up into the bedroom, and made a lot of noise, like I was just getting up. I pulled on my pants and shirt, and I was just finishing tucking it in when I came out. Eric was leaning against a counter in the kitchen, and Travis was leaning against the counter opposite him. If not for the situation, it would have been quite amusing, their identical postures, and mirrored glares. Travis looked somewhat smug when he glanced at me, but his face seemed to fall as he took in my clothing. Oh. Getting dressed was stupid, because Travis, at least, realized I had heard them talking. Or maybe he thought... well, who knows what he thought? Whatever it was, he wasn't very happy about it. Eric seemed to notice.

"Morning guys," I said as casually as I could muster. I walked over to the fridge and got out the orange juice. The eggs were on the counter next to the flour and a mixing bowl, but nothing was cooking. I had no idea what I should do -- kiss Travis good morning? Start cooking myself eggs? Leave?

"I made coffee," Travis said in a low voice.

"Oh, I'd love some, thanks," Eric responded in a bitchy voice. Damn Eric.

"What's up, Eric?" I asked. I sounded tired, even to myself. "What did you come over for?"

"Well," Eric started, not looking at either of us, "There's been a slight change of plans, and Kyle wanted to know if you guys wanted to come over for dinner tonight. You know, Christmas Eve and all. We were going to cook, but Kyle's sister and brother in law backed out, so we still have everything for dinner... anyway, it doesn't really matter."

I had totally forgotten that it was Christmas Eve. I didn't have any plans until Christmas, so I shrugged and nodded. Travis just stared for a moment before he shrugged.

"I'll get back to you," Travis said, glaring.

"Fine," Eric snapped.

Obviously, I had missed some part of their conversation.

Eric left, and Travis just looked at me. Only, I get the impression that he was taking in the fact that I was clothed, right down to my socks and tucked in shirt.

"So, I was going to make crepes," Travis offered quietly, "if you want them..."

"Sure! I'd love some," I said, forcing a smile. Only, I didn't actually manage a smile. We stared at each other for what felt like an eternity. Finally, he looked down and brought a hand up to rub the bridge of his nose. Then he turned and began preparing the batter.

"So, Keith," Travis finally said, so softly I almost didn't hear him.

"Yes?" I asked, my voice unnaturally high.

"Ah, so... I don't think Eric approves," Travis laughed nervously.

"Yeah, I don't really understand that."

"Well, yeah. Yeah," Travis said, suddenly very nervous. This worried me, not going to lie. I didn't like where this was going. "He's worried. Ah, yeah, he's... well, he thinks that... I don't know. I don't really know, I mean..."

"Spit it out, Travis." I'm not sure when I got annoyed, but I suddenly found myself that way.

"Sorry. I think... well, he thinks that..." Travis trailed off again. He had turned toward me. When he finally glanced up he immediately looked down again and continued. "He's worried I'm going to hurt you. Or maybe that I'm still messed up about... you know, Mark... and that I'm going to regret this, or you are, or something like that."

I just looked at him. This got awkward fast, but then -- what had I really expected?

"He said you had a thing for me since... well, a while," Travis said, real low. Apparently he had taken my silence as a sign that he should elaborate, but I wished that he hadn't.

"Oh, wow," I said in a whoosh of breath. I hadn't meant to speak, or to even make a noise, but there it was. My blood was cold again, and my heart had dropped down into my stomach. I couldn't think of how to save face, or to make a joke out of it, or do anything like that. I did want to kick Eric, but he wasn't there to be kicked. So, I just stood there, and I kind of wanted to cry. The past few days with Travis had been like heaven, and while they would have come to an end eventually, I felt like Eric had somehow done some damage. Like maybe Travis and I would have continued casually for a while, and it would have developed into something. I actually had it in my mind. We would continue sleeping together, and one day -- like maybe Valentine's Day or my birthday or something -- he would realize he was madly in love with me. I would wait patiently for him until that point, when he caught up with me.

Because, naturally, I was completely in love with him. And there was no way I could tell him that. I was fairly certain he wasn't at that point yet, maybe not even sure he wanted more than sex. However, my reaction may have gave that away...

"Crazy, right?" Travis asked. I jerked my head up. He was looking at me and looking a bit forlorn, but he wasn't screwing with me. Did he really not get it?

"Uh, yeah," I managed. Might as well save face, even though part of me wanted to scream, 'I love you, you moron!' Travis nodded and took a deep breath as he turned away.

"Well, I guess you'll probably want to get ready for dinner at Kyle and Eric's place."

"Oh," I said, startled. He was dismissing me, just like that. And, just because I'm that sort of guy, I felt tears sting my eyes. They wouldn't be stopped, that I knew...

So, I left, before Travis noticed that I was crying. Even though it wasn't even nine in the morning yet, and how long did he really think it would take me to get ready? I left because I couldn't think of anything else to do. I could have told him how I felt, but... what can I say? I really am a loser.