***This story is fictional although some of the experiences including joining the military are accurate. This is my first in a series of stories and I would appreciate any comments, feedback and suggestions.***
The door had been opened and I knew that no matter how much I wished it hadn't things would never be the same again.
It all happened the last weekend before I was due to ship off to basic training. My parents after extorting an agreement from me to be hauled to every relative in Georgia's house my remaining few days agreed to go away that Saturday night. Originally my plan was to invite my girlfriend Sarah over for some . . . quality time before an extended period of enforced abstinence. Unfortunately fate being a cruel bitch her Grandpa passed away and she'd had to go to Florida with her family.
Instead I invited over a handful of my friends mainly from the football team and we spent the afternoon eating, drinking the beer my parents had been kind enough to buy before they left and horsing around. Basically the same thing I'd been doing all summer but better on this instance since I knew I wouldn't have an another opportunity like that for quiet some time.
As the day turned into night people went home until it was only me and my best friend Tommy sitting in lawn chairs in the back yard passing back and forth a bottle of bourbon I had liberated from my parents liquor cabinet. Tommy's family lived just down the country lane and for as long as either of us could remember we'd been best friends. We'd played together, worked together, gone to school together, and even gone with each other on family vacations. We were best friends true enough but probably because we were both only children we were practically brothers.
The level of whiskey slowly dwindling we sat there laughing and talking about our shared experiences. Despite the laughter though the mood was somewhat somber. I was going to the Army in a few days and he leaving for college pretty soon thereafter. We both swore it wouldn't happen to us but we both knew as we moved out into our insulated world we'd likely drift apart. Sad to be sure but a fact of life we'd seen time and again.
"So you excited about going to Vandy?" I said trying to ease the sour mood that had settled over us.
Tommy looked over but hesitated as if considering what he was going to say. "I'm not going to Vanderbilt," he said finally, "I'm going to go to UCLA."
"Holy fuck," I said more then a bit surprised. Tommy's family for generations back had gone to Vanderbilt for college before returning to take a position with the family firm, "How the fuck did you manage that."
Tommy laughed wryly. "It wasn't easy," he said a bit sadly, "But I had a pretty good reason."
"No shit," I said shaking my head in disbelief. The South can be stubborn in about every way imaginable but when it comes to family tradition it is utterly and totally inflexible. "What the fuck could that possibly be?"
"Well," Tommy said quietly as his gaze dropped to his hands, "I'm gay. If I go to UCLA I can finally be myself."
If a UFO had swooped down from the sky and landed in the yard in front of us I doubt I could have been more surprised. Here was my best friend, a guy I'd gone out on double dates with. A guy I'd swapped conquest stories with. And he was into men?
"I'm sorry," I heard Tommy say in a voice barely above a whisper, "I didn't mean to disappoint you."
When I looked over I could see Tommy's warm green eyes shimmering with tears. "No, no," I said finally, "I'm not disappointed just surprised."
When he looked up at me I could a thin trail of tears running from his eyes illuminated by the moonlight. "Think about it Ben," he said as he reached up and wiped away the tears with the back of his hands. "It isn't that hard to believe."
"The Hell it isn't Tommy," I said thinking about all the women he'd dated, "Christ man you banged Angie all last summer."
"No I didn't," he said chuckling half heartedly, "She was the first person I told and she let me make up the stories so I'd be safer."
Thinking about it, that made perfect sense. In rural Georgia if you're known or even thought to be gay you will endure everything from ostracism and taunts from people you considered friends to regular beatings.
"Have you ever done anything?" I said suddenly curious, "With a guy I mean."
"Yeah right," he said the sadness creeping back into his voice, "There's a queer on every corner. What was I supposed to do blow Blake Johnson in the shower after practice?
This brought laughter from both of us. Blake I suppose was a good enough guy but I doubt there had been a bigger red neck in South Georgia in a hundred years. I had no doubt that if Tommy had ever tried anything with him he would have been beat within an inch of his life and whispers of a lynching would have started floating around the school.
"Well," I said finally managing to choke back the laughter, "You're a cute guy so you shouldn't have any trouble finding a guy out in California. Fuck they'll probably be beating down your door."
Tommy said there before he said uncertainly, "You really think I'm cute Ben, I mean really?"
In fact I always had. He was three or four inches shorter then me and had a smooth, lean body. Muscular but not to much of a good thing. Knowing what I know now I'd say he had a swimmers build. His best feature though was his face which had a sweetness and innocence to it that defied belief. Short blonde hair bleached almost white by the summer sun framing warm green eyes and full luscious lips.
"Yeah Tommy," I said quietly, "You're a beautiful guy. Christ man if I were gay you couldn't keep me away."
