Aaron's Summer of '77

Chapter Sixteen - Secrets and Revelations

"Ahhh c'mon honey... jeezus Aaron... if only you coulda' just seen the look on your face when we came through the door, you woulda' laughed too! Just thank the fuckin' lord you were holding that sign in front of you. Ronnie and Jason thought it was fuckin' hilarious babe. Forget about it baby. " Adam keeps looking at me with a stupid, lopsided, dumb grin on his face while trying to stifle yet another laugh.

"You just wait Adam! Next time you bend over in front of me your hairy man ass is going to get captured on Kodak film and make it into the next-day edition of The Ottawa Citizen... under 'Death Notices'!"

"Now honey... they didn't get to see as much of ya' as me and we all went out and had a nice dinner afterwards. What can I do to make it up to ya' Aaron?"

"I'll have to give that some thought sasq'. I will admit though I was sure your eyes were going to pop out of their sockets and you blocked their view and covered me up with your ski jacket as fast as you could. I suppose I should be grateful for that gallant gesture at least."

"Ahhh... c 'mere cookie... I promise I won't bring any surprise guests over... until the next time!"

Adam starts to laugh all over again.

"You bastard!"

"Happy Birthday Dad!"

"Thanks very much Aaron. I have to admit, I've really been feeling my age lately. I guess this is as good a time as any to let you know that I have put in my letter of resignation for formal retirement in late spring."

"I don't think of you as old, Dad. You're my 'Dad'. I don't think you'll ever be old to me."

"Well son, time marches on and catches up with all of us sooner or later. Your Mother and I are thinking of putting the house up on the market and considering one of those seniors retirement apartments they're building beside St. Francis Xavier on Church Street where the old Notre Dame Convent is standing. We'll have our choice of which apartment if we get our names on the list right away. The building is supposed to be done in early 1980. You know, I think I'd like to be able to look over at the stained glass windows of the church from a balcony and I could go to morning Mass every day."

Hmmm... what does Mom think about this?"

"She's tired and bored herself Aaron and wants to travel a bit. We were thinking about going out to Calgary to visit Ariana and Nick and the grandkids this year and then maybe on to Banff and Lake Louise to see the Rockies. Maybe even on to Victoria after that... The house here is getting to be a lot for her to manage. And it's just too big now for the two of us... time for someone else to love it and maintain it and raise a family here now."

"I understand Dad. But what about Blackjack? "

"Well son... we have plenty of time now to plan and nothing is certainly going to happen overnight. We're all going through important life events and changes right now. Best to think them through and not act too quickly."

"Yeah... I guess so Dad."

Mom is helping herself to a third glass of red wine and after topping up Dad's and Adam's glasses, she hoists up her glass and says, "Cheers Richard! Happy Birthday!"

"Thanks honey... but slow down with that wine until King Yee serves us some food. I'm not carrying you back home after dessert."

"Ohhh, Richard... I was thinking we could go out dancing at the Flying Dutchman after this! Adam... you promised to show me how to do 'The Hustle'. You didn't forget now did you?"

"Ummm... no ma'am I didn't." Just then Adam leans over to me and whispers, "But I sure as hell was hopin' 'she' would!"

At last I have my opportunity!

"Mom! That's a great idea. I haven't been out there in ages! That big stone fireplace in the lounge there would be perfect on a cold, snowy night like tonight. Let's do that. It'll be fun!" Then I smile and whisper into Adams' ear, "And 'that's' for 'not' telling me about Daphne and Victor's and Ronnie and Jason on Valentine's Day!"

My baby moves at midnight

Goes right on till the dawn, yeah

My woman takes me higher

My woman keeps me warm

What you doin' on your back, aah

What you doin' on your back, aah?

You should be dancing, yeah

Dancing, yea ...

The Bee Gees are blaring out from the speakers on the dance floor and Adam looks mortified while Mom tries to follow his rhythm and dance moves.

"All he needs is a white polyester suit to match your Mother and they could go on American Bandstand together" says Dad as he laughs and sits back watching the two of them trying to dance together.

"Mom really makes you laugh at times, doesn't she Dad?"

"That's one of the secrets to a happy marriage Aaron. You just have to laugh at life sometimes son. We're all going to wind up dead and buried some day. Might as well enjoy the ride until we get there. Remember that!"

"Ummm... Dad, I talked to Adam about Mrs. Abelson and the apartment sub-let. You haven't seen that place. It's pretty grand and elegant. I don't really think it's our style. We'd feel uncomfortable like we'd have to live up to it's elegance all the time and well... it just isn't what Adam and I were thinking of when we eventually move. Besides, it's only a one bedroom and we were thinking two for when you and Mom and Mrs. Blanchard and Bast come up to visit and maybe stay on weekends. Adam is hoping to get another car after he starts work too and outside parking in the back of that building is not something he wants to have to deal with in the winter months. Indoor-heated garage parking, two bedrooms and maybe something more modern in a high-rise building close to the College Campus is more along the lines of what he and I were thinking."

"Funny you should think of that just now son. I meant to tell you, they took Alan out of Elmgrove a couple of weeks ago. I haven't seen or heard from them and I have a sneaking suspicion they're not bring him back either. Last time I spoke with Mr. Abelson he said he thought Alan was all better, that he and his wife were leaving for Europe for a while and that Adam would be just fine on his own in Maitland with their maid and the grounds keeper. I don't think he wants to have to deal with him to be completely honest. That whole episode isn't over yet son. And I don't see a happy ending to it either."

"Not much laughter there, is there Dad?"

"No Aaron... I'm afraid not."

It's the beginning of March and a couple of weeks before spring break. Ronnie's boyfriend Jason and I are having lunch together in the cafeteria at Carleton University. "Thanks Jason for showing me the library at Carleton and offering to pick up books from the Architecture Program for me. I have an assignment for Lynda Naagy-Birdsong coming up soon and I can't find the research material I need at Algonquin on European Art Nouveau. How are you doing with your courses?"

"God. That name... 'bird seed'!'

"Knock it off Jason! Adam calls her 'bird brain'! I've almost called her that a few times myself!"

Jason chuckles and then says, "Well Aaron... I figured it was time we got to know each other since we're both dating super guys who went to school together back in Brockville. We're almost the same age and it's great to be able to talk with someone else who's gay and not in one of my classes, if you know what I mean."

"Yeah... I do Jason. Sooo... how are you doing with your courses here though?"

"Second year in 'Urban Planning' is a tough slog. I'll be glad to get a break in a couple of weeks. "

"Me too Jason. I don't know if I'm going to have to work on assignments over the March Break. I hope not though because I want to spend some time with Adam. He's been so good with me and trying to get himself set up at home. And he just got official word from the Department of Health and Welfare that he got the job they were interviewing him for. He's nervous though because they want him to start French language training in July and I know that's really been on his mind since he got the call from them."

"Well hell Aaron... I'm fluent in French. Tell him if he ever needs someone to help him, I'd be happy to do whatever I can."

"Thanks Jason. I know he'd appreciate that. So what do you and Ronnie have planned for Break?"

"His Dad isn't doing so well right now... they're thinking about selling the farm outside of Merrickville and maybe moving into Brockville where he can get some decent health care. That place has been in his family for four or five generations though and his older brother still lives right beside it with his family. Ronnie wants to go down with me to spend a few days with his Dad and Mom. They're nice people. I really like them very much."

"We're both pretty lucky with the guys we wound up with aren't we Jason?"

"I'd say 'they' were lucky to wind up with 'us' Aaron."

Just then a bell starts to ring in the cafeteria and Jason has to rush off to make it to his next class.

"Gotta' go. I'll give you a call and we'll get together later on in the week. OK Aaron?"

"Later Jason. Bye."

"Good afternoon. Is this Mrs. Thomas Blane Richard Blanchard?"

"I haven't been a Mrs. Thomas anything for the past several years. Who 'is' this calling?

"Oh, I am sorry Mrs. Blanchard. I should have introduced myself first. I'm Miss Angelina McCarthy from the Law Firm Crawley, Crawley, Carruthers and Feltmate in Edmonton, Alberta. I understand you and Mr. Blanchard were once married and have an adult son Adam. Am I correct in assuming this?"

"What's this all about?" asks Delphine while starting to get angry and impatient with the woman on the other end of the phone.

"I'm sorry to have to be the one to tell you this Mrs. Blanchard. But Adam's father, Mr. Blanchard has had terminal cancer for the past year and well.. sadly, he just passed away yesterday."

"Oh my God! I had no idea! Tom deserted Adam and me years ago and I haven't had any contact with him in many years. We didn't know he was sick! In fact, we didn't even know for sure where he was, although we suspected it was in Edmonton or at least somewhere in Alberta there."

"Well... I'm calling you to get a phone number in order to contact your son, Mrs. Blanchard. Mr. Blanchard made up a will and filed it with us years ago assigning Adam as Executor and sole beneficiary to his estate."

"Well... neither Adam nor I are going to be held responsible for any of that sorry bastard's debts! He almost destroyed me when he walked out on us and I damned near lost the house back then! I want nothing to do with him and his miserable pathetic excuse for a life and I won't have my son involved in any of his messes either!"

"You misunderstand Mrs. Blanchard. He left a life insurance policy in Adam's name and there is some money and possessions like his furniture and a car that he left for his son."

Delphine is shaking with emotion at this point and completely shocked about what this woman is saying to her on the phone.

"I don't understand! He wanted nothing to do with us when he abandoned us! Why would he do this now? Why? Why?"

"I can't answer that Mrs. Blanchard."

"I'm having trouble taking this all in at the moment."

"Quite understandable under the circumstances Mrs. Blanchard. This must be a big shock for you."

"That's putting it mildly Miss... what was your name again?"

"McCarthy... Angelina McCarthy."

"Well... I want to be the one to break this to Adam, Miss McCarthy. Give me your phone number and I'll have Adam give you a call once I've had a chance to talk to him about all of this."

"Don't wait too long please Mrs. Blanchard. Mr. Blanchard made his funeral arrangements over a year ago and he will be cremated within the next couple of days. He didn't specify what he wanted done with his remains and outside of some man he has been living with for the past six or seven years... that is... at least I think they were living together... there is no one out here to make any binding legal decisions or handle the details of his estate. Please have him contact us as soon as possible."

Delphine hangs up and then just stares at the phone for the longest time. How in the hell am I going to break this to Adam? After all these years and now I have to relive all of this. His Father... bisexual! I suspected it all along and should have said something to Adam long before now! His father... bisexual and living with another man. This is just too much! Adam will be devastated! A bisexual Father and him gay. Oh God! I thought I'd never have to have this conversation with Adam! My poor little boy. Oh God! What now?

"Hiya' Mom. So how was Quebec City? Did you and Bast get to see his family and didya' have a good time down there?"

"Never mind that for now Adam. I got a phone call today from Edmonton and there are a few things I have to tell you."

Adam looks over at me at my drafting board and says, "It's my Mom calling cookie. Something's up. She sounds kinda' upset."

"Edmonton Mom? Who do you know in Edmonton?"

"Just listen to me Adam. This isn't something I can talk to you about over the phone. I'm driving up there tomorrow first thing and we can talk face to face. When are Aaron's classes? And will you be there in the morning? This is important darling."

"Ummm... yes Mom. Aaron will be over at the school tomorrow and we can talk then. Can't you even give me a clue about what you want to talk about?"

"Not now Adam! I'll be up there right after 9:00am. Just be there!"

Adam hangs up the phone and frowns while I ask, "So what was all that about Adam?"

"Dunno' honey. She's coming up here tomorrow to talk to me. She said something about gettin' a call from Edmonton. She sounded pretty serious on the phone and wouldn't tell me any more than that."

"You think she's OK sasq'?"

"Guess I'll find out tomorrow..."

"Good God Adam. This place is tiny! No sofa and just a bed and nowhere to sit?"

"Oh Mom... It's OK for now. Now go and sit at Aaron's drafting board and I'll getcha' a coffee and you can tell me what this is all about."

"Are these some of the things Aaron does at school here?"

"Umm... yeah Mom. That model is a student workspace he made last semester and those pen and ink drawings are going to be part of a store design he's workin' on right now. I helped him with that Architecture booklet there on the desk... "

She reaches over and starts to leaf through the Brockville Historical Architecture presentation Adam and I did for Lynda Naagy-Birdsong. She stares at our joint work in silence and then turns to face Adam and says quietly, "I had no idea he was so talented."

"I told ya' Mom, He's something and someone really special... to me. Now what brought ya' all the way up here from Brockville? What's goin' on?"

"I'm not sure where to start darling... "

"I'm listening Mom... just take your time."

"Well... yesterday I got a call from a Lawyer's office in Edmonton about your Dad."

"What?"

"Yes... exactly... my reaction too. Ummm... Adam... he died the day before yesterday!"

Adam's mouth is wide open and he is just staring at Delphine not knowing what to say.

"I might as well start at the beginning and tell you what I know. First off, and I don't want you to get angry at me for not telling you about this before now. I always suspected but I never knew for sure. There were reasons he left you and me years ago that I hoped I would never have to really face and now it's all coming back to force me to relive the time I was married to him and what others told me after he deserted us. He just wasn't around for us Adam."

"I know Mom. I don't really remember him being in the house when I was little except for the times you and he argued."

"I know that Adam. How do I tell you this? Ummm... he wasn't there because after I got pregnant and had you... well, he kept saying to me he felt trapped in a relationship he just wasn't cut out to deal with. I never knew for sure. But I always suspected there were others he was with. After all, he lost interest in me and was never around. That's why you don't have memories of him when you were just a little boy. "

"Go on Mom."

"Well darling... this woman called me yesterday from Edmonton. She is with a Law Firm out there and called to get your phone number because she needed to contact you about your Father. I'm probably going to blurt this out here and it may be very confusing for you. But I'm upset and her call gave me a real shock. I'll tell you everything I know and then you can decide if you want to contact them or not."

"OK Mom. Keep talking."

"Seems like your Father had a will and named you as Executor to his estate."

"What does that mean Mom?"

"It means that you are responsible to settle his affairs and are the beneficiary of anything he has left after everything is settled and paid off."

"I haven't got any money to pay off his debts Mom! He fucked you over but good back then. I remember and he's not gonna' do the same to me now that he's dead!"

"I know Adam. Well... and I told the woman on the phone that too and she said he didn't leave many outstanding debts and that he left you a life insurance policy and that whatever money was there in addition to that would more than cover whatever he owed. Also, that he had a car and some furniture and personal effects that all belong to you now."

Adam stares at his Mom and is waiting for her to continue.

"What's the catch here Mom? What aren't you telling me?"

"Well darling... I never knew for sure until years later. But to be honest with you, sex between your Father and me was non-existent those last three or four years before he disappeared on us. God! How do I tell you this?"

"I'm a grown man Mom. You can talk to me. Go on!"

Well Adam, your Father was bisexual."

"What?"

"Bisexual... I didn't know that when we got married. And thinking back now I think he married me to hide that from everyone in Brockville... including me and probably himself too."

"Oh Mom!"

"I didn't want you to ever have to know that. After all that was a secret and it was something private and intimate really between him and me in our marriage. When he left you were still just a teenager and I knew you were gay even back then and didn't want you to think you were the way you were because of him. Oh! This is all just so complicated!"

"Mom! It's OK."

"You were so angry with him for deserting us back then and were having your own problems with yourself and at school. And I was just trying the best I could to keep the house and not lose it and keep us going... "

Silence from Adam. Then, "I don't know what to say Mom. I just don't."

"Apparently he's been supposedly living with another man for the last few years in Edmonton. That much I got out of the woman who called. I have no other information other than that to give you regarding his... ummm, living arrangements out there. God knows what kind of situation you'll be dealing with should you decide to call the Lawyers back."

"Have ya' got that phone number on ya' Mom?"

Delphine is crying at this point and wiping tears away as she hands the scrap of paper with the phone number scribbled down on it to Adam.

"He's to be cremated in the next day or so. You won't likely make it out there before if you decide to go. He made his funeral arrangements when he was diagnosed with cancer last year. I'll get you a plane ticket to fly out if you decide to go. God... what a sad end to a sad story. I'm so sorry Adam!"

"I don't blame you for not telling me about him Mom. I just wish I coulda' got to know him a bit though. I think he and I coulda' helped each other... what a waste. Fuck!"

"He would have been proud of the man you've turned out to be Adam. And I know whatever the problems there were between him and me... well, he 'did' love you. I guess what he's left to you should prove that after all this time."