Acting the Part

The drama department's bulletin board was plastered with sign-up sheets for auditions. Tristan's eyes flitted over his options, skipping anything directed by undergrads. He had limited time this semester as it was his last year at school and he wanted to build a strong portfolio of successful shows before graduating. He found one bulletin that listed the director as a PhD student and booked an audition time before glancing at the line of text at the top of the page.

Please be aware that the male lead role requires nudity. Inform me of whether you are auditioning for male lead or only for supporting roles at the time of your audition.

Lead roles were few and far between for Tristan. Despite his consistent success in his drama classes, he found himself being type-cast again and again because of his Asian heritage. He hovered for a moment, trying to determine whether he would be comfortable with nudity. It would likely mean less competition for the role and a great addition to his acting resume. Plus, acting was never about staying within one's comfort zone. Tristan left his name on the list.

The day of the audition arrived and Tristan waited patiently outside the fourth floor classroom that had been assigned for the purpose. The two monologues he often used for auditions ran silently through his mind. Nudity, on the other hand, was far from his thoughts. He would start thinking about that challenge if he got the role.

A first year student Tristan vaguely recognized exited the room. There was a bit of colour in his cheeks and a look of permanent embarrassment across his face. Tristan offered him a smile. He remembered his early auditions and how poorly many of them had gone. As the younger man passed, Tristan thought he noticed a bulge beneath the fabric of his jeans. Tristan smiled a little bigger. Oh the ways embarrassment multiplies itself. Auditions did have the miraculous effect on unseasoned actors of bringing out teenage tendencies like getting erections in times of utter humiliation.

A woman peaked out the door. "Tristan?"

Tristan nodded.

"Come on in."

Two women sat at a table at the front of the room. The woman who had ushered him in took the third chair and gazed up at him.

"My name is Ava and I will be your director if your audition is successful." Ava was tall and very dark, with high cheekbones and a thick voice. She kept her hair very short. She was stunning. "To my right is Taylor and beside her is Alex. Taylor is my assistant director and Alex is my stage manager." The two women looked younger than Ava who Tristan had estimated to be close to thirty, maybe closer to his own age. Taylor had a sprinkle of freckles across her pale nose and chest and a very full form. Alex was tiny but stern-looking, with several feet of dreadlocks pulled back from her face and revealing large plugs in both her earlobes.

"Nice to meet you all," said Tristan, smiling genuinely and reaching out for a handshake to each of the women in turn.

"To begin, are you auditioning for the lead role or just the supporting roles in this play?"

"The lead," confirmed Tristan, "I'm comfortable with the aspect of nudity required."

"Excellent," replied Ava, glancing down to write notes. "I do have to ask though, are you circumcised?" Her eyes returned to Tristan's face. He wasn't expecting such a personal question.

Regaining composure quickly he responded, "No."

"Ex-cellent," Ava repeated. "So we're asking you to do the audition in the nude. This is a chance for you to decide whether you are truly comfortable, especially considering that we are all women, as well as an opportunity for us to see how you use your body."

Again, Tristan was surprised. Ava's reasoning made perfect sense but he hadn't thought he would have to reveal everything quite so soon. He cleared his throat, "Alright." Stripping unceremoniously he left his boxers for last, finally slipping them over his hips while looking at the floor. The slight draft in the room became noticeable as his penis and balls were uncovered. He thought he could feel the women staring at his genitals. When he looked up, though, they all looked relatively uninterested.

He stumbled a couple times reciting his monologues, his mind overtaken by a hyperawareness of his nudity and vulnerability. When he finally finished he found the only way to distract himself from it was to study the women in front of him. He felt guilty about trying to look down Ava's shirt and glancing at Taylor's cleavage but he needed to increase his confidence if he were to continue conversing coherently and he wasn't going to be able to do this if his dangling genitals were at the forefront of his mind.

"Thank you Tristan," said Ava, her blank expression concealing her impression. Her breasts looked firm below her t-shirt and her skin was such a lovely chocolate brown.

"You're welcome," slipped from Tristan's lips. Suddenly he realized the drawback to trying to envision the women sexually as he felt a slight throb of blood in his shaft. Karma, he thought as he quickly focused solely on Ava's face.

"So would you still like to be considered for the role?" She asked.

"Yes," he nodded.

She smiled and nodded her head towards his clothes, "You can get dressed now". Relieved, Tristan quickly pulled his boxers over his slowly growing penis, concealing it before it could embarrass him. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Alex's eyes lingering on where it once was.

Giving a quick wave after thanking the women for their time, Tristan began to head for the door.

"I shouldn't say this," came Ava's voice behind him, "but you're the only one who hasn't gotten an erection so far." Tristan smiled back at her, keeping his crotch facing the door and suppressing the slight surge of guilt that he felt in his chest.

"Not that I don't enjoy the power to inflict them," Ava said laughing slightly, "but it is refreshing when someone is professional enough to put our gender aside."

Tristan nodded again before exiting. As the door swung shut behind him he could hear Alex's voice: "Or he's gay."

Then the door clicked closed. Tristan felt a slight tinge of annoyance towards Alex. He was not gay. He had never had any interest in men. He had had two serious girlfriend's in his life, both of whom he had slept with and greatly enjoyed sexually. But he had to let his irritation subside as he recalled that he

had

become excited by the trio. Alex was at least right that he wasn't quite as innocent as Ava's compliment suggested.

Nearly a week passed before Tristan received a phone call from Ava. He knew at least one of his classmates has been rejected for the female roles in the play already, and he hoped that the delay meant he was being seriously considered. He tried to put aside the terrifying aspect of nudity and focus on his desire for a lead role. Every so often, though, as he lay asleep at night and his hand drifted down to gently massage his scrotum or squeeze his pulsing head his fantasies landed him back in that audition room.

When he replayed the events the women couldn't take their eyes off the package between his legs. The cool draft in the room was stronger, heightening all erotic sensations. In his fantasy Ava would want to see what he looked like hard as well and Tristan would cautiously begin to fondle himself. As he stroked his shaft at the front of the room, Alex would hungrily stare at the growing penis in his hand. He would blush a little bit when he achieved erection too quickly but none of the women commented, just starred while they made him parade around the room, turn around slowly, even spread his legs. After these fantasies Tristan always chided himself. He was afraid if he continued to sexualize the experience he might run into problems if he was chosen for the role; perhaps find himself unable to separate the erotic stories from professional reality.

"Hi Tristan, this is Ava. I'd like to offer you the lead role in my play," came the distinct voice through the phone's earpiece.

Tristan thanked her and agreed to meet with the rest of the cast over the weekend to read over the script. He was proud of himself and couldn't help but think how excellent this role would be for his acting portfolio.

When he arrived at the meeting that Saturday, Tristan learned that the cast for the play was relatively small. When everyone was seated in a circle, Ava began to hand out scripts and go over the play. The story focussed on a family.

"Lily, you'll play the youngest daughter. Cho will play the oldest daughter. Lucas is the single father, and Tristan you're the middle child and the main character, Richard." Everyone Ava had named was of Chinese or Japanese heritage. Tristan was a little disappointed. It looked as though he had been type-cast again after all. He must have been naive to think that having a black director might make his race less relevant.

"The play was originally supposed to feature a Midwest white, republican family. Because of how the auditions went I decided we would have to go in another direction." Tristan lightened up. Perhaps he

was

chosen for his skill for once.

Tristan's character was struggling with whether to pursue a relationship with a man. The play culminated with his decision to embark on the sexual adventure. As the group read over the script, they came to his final scene. Tristan felt his stomach drop as he read the stage directions.

Richard slowly and self-consciously undresses while Carter watches. Then Carter makes a few strides toward Richard (from stage left to stage right), wraps his hand around Richard's penis and kisses him deeply. As the kiss finishes, Richard nods in consent and Carter guides him off stage left exit by his penis.

Tristan had come to terms with nudity. Having a man's hand wrapped around his junk and then pulling him across stage with it was something entirely different. The actor who would be playing Carter, Cole, read the directions in a monotone voice. When he was done, Ava burst in, "Oh the brilliance of having him guided by his penis, his phallus. The symbolism is just... well anyways. I love it." Tristan didn't really care about the symbolism.

They finished reading the play and trickled out. Tristan intentionally avoided Cole. He had never met the guy before and wanted to keep their relationship as distant as possible; there was something more palatable about acting out such an intimate scene with a stranger rather than a friend. Much easier to write off as professional work rather than an awkward encounter.

As the practices wore on, Cole seemed to be a nice guy. He gave the actresses hugs only when they asked for them and seemed to spend most of his free time between scenes reading award-winning novels. Tristan was slightly disappointed that he had to avoid such an appealing colleague, but continued to ignore him as best he could. Cole seemed to respect this.

Unlike his audition, the looming nude scene in the play never tempted Tristan to fantasize. So far they had done all rehearsals fully clothed and Tristan had no interest in thinking about what was to come. When his thoughts did begin to shift to visions of a man's hand reaching out and roughly grasping Tristan's most private parts, Tristan would quickly find something to distract himself with. He began watching porn again which he hadn't done in years just to replace the image with something else.

About a month before opening night, Ava announced Tristan and Cole would now be acting the scene out in full. Terror flooded Tristan's mind. He felt nauseous. Maybe he should say he was sick and head home for the day. Maybe he should fake severe illness and drop the play all together. These thoughts were still pounding against his skull as he climbed up on stage. Only Cole, Ava, Taylor, and Alex remained. Ava had had the good sense to send everyone else home for the day affording some privacy for Tristan and Cole to practice in.

Cole spoke his first line before ripping off his own shirt. He had an athletic build, lanky but toned and his torso was practically hairless except for the treasure trail from his belly button to below his jeans, sandy like his curly hair.

Words passed between the two actors. Then it was Tristan's turn. His discomfort in undressing was only partially acted. First his shirt came over his head. Then he slowly unbuckled his belt and dropped his pants.

Ava stopped him there. "I'd like you to buy some briefs for this role." Tristan nodded. She motioned for him to continue. With a deep breath he pulled off his boxers.

For a couple moments, him and Cole stood still on opposite sides of the stage. Then Cole began moving towards him, his gaze intense. Tristan tried to act nervous but interested, rather than emanate his genuine emotions of absolutely horror and fear. Cole was right in front of him. His hand reached out.

The feeling of fingers on Tristan's genitals was electric. The only thing in his mind was the feeling of the slight calluses on Coles fingertips and how gently he was cradling the sensitive organ. Then Cole's lips were on his. The stage kiss of course involved no tongue, but Tristan's nerves were all firing like crazy anyways. The smooth, cool skin of Coles chest pressing into his. The electricity of where their lips met. The pressure around his thumping penis.

The sudden rush of blood was hardening him up quickly and increasing the sensitivity of his already twitching penis. Before the kiss was complete, Tristan was noticeably erect. Cole began to tug carefully on the member as he turned to walk across the stage. He was very gentle, allowing Tristan his own pace and barely leading at all. The light grip against Tristan's engorged erection felt fantastic, especially as Cole's hand was jostled slightly as they walked.

"More forceful!" Ava called out. "I need you to be ultra-masculine right now."

Cole looked out at the three women. "It isn't masculine to inflict pain to another man's genitals," he shot back. Ava laughed. Tristan was aware of nothing but his rock solid erection. He wanted to die. He thought of what Ava had said at his audition about how professional he was to not get hard.

Cole took the last few steps off stage a little more powerfully, but his grip stayed loose so that Tristan could slip out of his grip if he fell behind. This had the effect of much movement along his shaft, each step resulting in a stroke that felt like liquid pleasure coursing through his body. As the two men disappeared behind the curtains, the three women clapped. It took every fibre of Tristan's being to force himself out on stage again, his erection pointing out lewdly in front of him and his face burning. He avoided looking at Cole.

"Fantastic!" Ava shouted at them. "Tristan – Amazing. You got so into that! I could feel the emotions pouring off of you and

that

," she gestured to his bobbing penis, "sealed the deal. If you can do that during the shows, that scene will be be-autiful." Tristan tried not to shake. His erection had just been excused. The embarrassment abated a bit. Now he was left to grapple with how erotic he had found the whole experience. Precum glistened on his penis head.

Tristan was still semi-hard by the time he got home, having practiced the scene several times. Involuntarily, his hand began to grope himself as he sat down on his bed. He came within minutes, the thought of Cole's hand wrapped around his package at the forefront of his mind as he jerked uncontrollably in pleasure and filled his hand with a hot pool of semen.

At the next practice Tristan's penis leapt to action once again which pleased Ava. Cole was still too gentle visually for her. She got on stage to show him how she would like it done. Tristan was surprised – while he had originally been horrified at the idea of a man touching him, now he wanted nothing more. He braced himself for the pain Ava's unknowing hand was undoubtedly about to inflict.

The gorgeous woman wrapped her slim fingers around Tristan's pulsing shaft, her firm grip trapping more blood in the head of his penis. Then she started off. Tristan panicked, trying to keep up with her as she pulled his foreskin forward and made him leak precum. He managed to keep pace but barely.

"That's good," said Taylor from the seats. "Tristan, don't look so panicked. You and Cole will just have to work up the trust level so you can handle that." That meant an extended rehearsal full of tentative tugging and forced communication between the two men.

"How does this feel?" asked Cole, blushing slightly.

"Good," responded Tristan. "I mean... fine." His balls ached. He needed a release. Cole's respectful touch and keenness to maintain the utmost comfort was pushing him into states of extreme physical pleasure. Being fondled, tugged, and stroked with the occasional passionate kiss had Tristan unconcerned with the gender of his partner.

Near the end of the day Tristan glanced down to notice a bulge in Cole's pants. For a moment he couldn't help but stare. He was overcome with curiousity. Cole had spent all rehearsal learning the intricacies of Tristan's genitals, but Tristan hadn't and wouldn't ever be able to see what Cole looked like below the belt.

Over the next several rehearsals he couldn't help but obsess over Cole's penis. Did he have big balls? Was he hairy? Or maybe he shaved. This thought excited Tristan. Though he was becoming much more comfortable with the repetitive snippet of nudity, and much less physically pleasured now that Cole had gotten his grip all adjusted and had no need to focus intently on Tristan's penis at all, Tristan still found himself turned on in rehearsal just fantasizing about what Cole might look like naked. It was a mystery that perturbed him and his desire to know something that he knew was unattainable translated into a strong erotic response.

About two weeks before opening night, Tristan began to become concerned with his obsession. Not only was it unprofessional, it was downright creepy. Cole had treated Tristan's body with nothing but respect and here he was wanting to violate the guy's privacy. Tristan resolved to let the sexy thoughts drop from his mind. At rehearsal he forced himself to consider Cole as nothing but a colleague. His penis remained soft for all three run-throughs.

After several days with no erection, Ava raised the issue, "You can't get bored with the scene yet, Tristan. I need you to get into it again. Bring that passion, that erotic energy you had at the beginning."

"She means get hard." It was rare that Alex spoke at rehearsal. Mostly she just wrote Ava's directions on the script, or went off with the technical crew to discuss lighting. But her voice rang out clearly this time.

Ava nodded. "Next rehearsal we are going to do a full run through of the play. That means the other actors will be here and you will have an audience." While Tristan understood her intention was to let him know he had to be at the top of his game, he also breathed a sigh of relief. It would be easy to get hard with all the other cast watching him naked. He was even okay with the familiar sense of fear that welled up when he thought of exposing himself to so many people. It was preferable to being further chided about his absent erection. After all, there's nothing worse than being unable to get it up.

Tristan was right. The cluster of people in the front row staring unabashedly at his penis the next day did help a little. He was able to get semi-erect, and as he was lead offstage past the two ogling women whose scene followed his, he began to grow to full size. He wasn't sure if it was by accident that Lily brushes up against his penis as she passed by. Over the next few rehearsals, though, he was inconsistent and Ava became more concerned as opening night approached.