Jitters or not, when the mooring lines were yanked up by the boatswain's mates onboard my ship, and the tugs pulled us away, it was official: I was enduring my first deployment as a United States Navy Sailor.
"Here it goes," said Tannebaum.
Tannebaum and I were standing in the hangar bay watching things unfold, as we were leaving the pier. We were what you called yeomen, a job within the branch, as well as the coast guard, that's primarily a secretary, and somewhat bookkeeper for the crew and the commanding officer. We eyed the pier, leaving behind families, friends and other associates that stood to see all 5,000 off for what would be one tumultuous, eight month trek.
"You nervous," he asked me.
I was, as I'd just finished basic training not even six months prior, and here I was, away from all that was familiar and really about to do something that could be life changing. Tannebaum, this tall, lanky, freckle faced white kid, was a petty officer second class and my direct supervisor, but mentored me from the moment I came onboard. He'd already been in seven years and this adventure would be his second long ride, as we called it. He put his hand around my shoulder, as we watched the ship move further away from the pier, tears welling in my eyes as I didn't know what to expect.
"Are you crying, kid," he asked. "Don't fret. Come on, let's walk a bit."
"YN2, you don't understand. This is all so surreal," I told him. "This is, just unreal."
He snickered, as we walked through the hangar, having a bonding moment. He recollected on when he was in the same shoes, 19 years old, leaving a girlfriend, and in his case, a baby behind, and just not knowing what to expect. He expounded on how using the phone, or internet, would often come at a premium, the constant training, lack of sleep, and of course, any adversity that would arise due to world events being all a challenge. The more he talked, the more depressed I became, and started to question if I made the right decision.
"I won't be able to talk to my girl," I asked.
"There will be times you won't, but trust me, just ride it out. It will be rough in the beginning, but ride it out. I'll do my damndest to ensure to keep you busy, and that you come back better than when you left. For now, I need you to get it together," he said.
We'd walked from one side of the empty hangar, to the other, as personnel within the hangar were doing final preparations to receive aircraft that would come in within the next 24 hours. He left me at the forwardmost part of the ship, as he had to run to the Captain's office to handle some correspondence.
"Remember, we'll come back better than when we arrived," he said to me.
We shook hands, and he went up a ladderwell, while I stood under it and sulked, missing Brandy, my high school sweetheart and fiancee.
"Babe, you wanna get away? Join the Navy," she said, a year prior to this deployment.
She remained back in Texas where I'm from, as we agreed to get married once I returned from deployment. She encouraged me to go this route when I mentioned I wanted us to have a better life, to get away from Texas and press forward to bigger and better things than our small town, i.e. college degrees, a family, and financial prosperity. She wasn't on the pier when I left, as I told her I couldn't stand to tell her goodbye like that. I regretted it at this moment.
"Baby, I miss you," I whined out loud.
No one interrupted me while I cried, and after 30 minutes, I decided to wipe my face and head to berthing, since I would be working the overnight shift in our office.
"Martinez, you're gonna be just fine," said Tannebaum, as he happened to be sitting in the lounge area of our quarters, playing with his phone.
I nodded at him, then went for my locker, coming out my uniform, and grabbing shower items, boxers and a t-shirt as I going to wash up, then get some sleep to compensate for the coming hours. I put on my shower shoes and Tannebaum showed up, as his rack was below mine.
"Gonna take a shower," he asked.
"Yeah, just getting ready for tonight," I told him.
"Well, I'll be doing the same shortly. Just got word that I'll be working with you on night check," he added.
That gave me a little reassurance. Tannebaum was one I admired and trusted, as earlier, that was solidified when he was able to relate to what I was going through. He expanded on that subject when he mentioned he was married, and that he and his wife had a total of three children since that first deployment. He just gave me hope that I'd be just fine, and I would rest my mind a little as I was heading to clean myself.
