Alright, new chapter is up. Once again, haters on this website, if you want this story to stop, then move along, I can post whatever I want here.
For those of you who like this story, I hope you enjoy - I'm a little uncertain with the structure of this chapter, it's kind of... Dodgy to me.
Let me know what you think.
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Chapter 93: Fleeting Distance
Donna takes a deep breath as the pause between her and Adam linger for about a minute after Jessica and the pastor and his priests have left. Adam stares at her while she avoids eye contact from him.
What she just did... What she just said... What?
"So... I think it is a safe assumption that... This Jessica woman was the one sneaking you out after dark?" Donna asked. Adam doesn't answer as he continues to give her a stunned gaze.
"I um... I suppose I should ask the others about... You know, her, and see if they know anything..." She takes another breath, and takes a few steps around her chair, "You'd like to sit back down, we can contin..."
Adam takes a step or two back after she moved. Donna's chest feels a strange pang of guilt as she looks at her son. He looks so shocked, intimidated. Like just before an outcry comes after telling a child there is no such thing as the Tooth Fairy.
"... Adam, please don't look at me like that..." Donna finally said, "Please... You can be mad, y-you can yell at me if you need to, I just... Oh gosh, I don't even know what advice to give now..." She says as she feels her forehead.
"... Is it true?" Adam finally asked, his own chest pounding solidly, "Are you my m... My Mom?" Donna wipes her eyes from this awkward discovery, "This whole time?"
"Hhh... Yes, it's true, Adam, I am your mother."
"All this time?" Adam paraphrased, "After all these days, you asking me all those questions? I told you all my thoughts, what I dreamed about, what." Adam shook his head as he took a couple of steps back, "I... I honestly don't know what to feel right now..." He says, his breathing becoming quicker.
"Adam... I need you to keep calm..."
"Just!" Adam raises his arms, his hands clawing a bit on either side of his head. "Just, tell me why." He said, almost pleadingly, "And can I get a straight answer this time??"
"... The day you were released from the hospital, you were supposed to come home." She starts. "That was also supposed to be the day you were to meet me... Then, before you can even get to the front door, you have this... Severe migraine that practically blinded you with for the better half of an hour. Now as someone who works with the human mind and emotions thereof, tell me that shouldn't show a few red flags to anyone."
"I felt alone, Doctor..." Adam huffed as he shakes his head, "I don't even know what to call you now."
"Well... I could tell you what to call me, but... I think you want to hear more, don't you?"
"Yes. Yes, just, please, just tell me." Adam nods.
"As you can imagine, that's exactly why I've had you put on such a short leash." Donna says as she paces. "Limiting your trips, arranging your class and rehab schedule for you, overseeing all of your sessions."
"So that's why I can't even know about my own life?" Adam says as he glares at her with sad eyes, "Doctor, I felt alone, isolated, even when I have visitors, I feel like... It's like everyday, I'd have a few minutes of company, and then when they had to leave, I felt trapped." His chest feels a little tighter, "And I keep asking everyone these questions, but for the most part, they just give me a few answers, before just telling me that YOU won't let them. Doctor, if I don't get the answers I need, I don't know who to trust!"
"That's, that's a very good point, I will admit that..." Donna nods, "I see just how that can affect you..." She sniffs as she keeps avoiding to looking at him, "I just... After you collapsed at the house, I panicked... Ideally, I wanted you to stay in the hospital a little longer, but you were too healthy to have it, and another patient needed it... So I thought about having you stay here, but the rooms here are a bit pricy if the insurance doesn't match the criteria."
"I don't -- What do you mean?" Adam says. His emotions are easing down, seeing this woman get slightly emotional, trying to keep herself together.
"I... After what happened, I needed you to stay here... And as it is, your father and me can barely afford to live in the apartment we're living in now, let alone have you stay here. So while your Luther is able to keep up with the rent in our apartment, my salary here was just enough to pay for your stay in the ward and as well as the bills."
Adam silently gasped, as a tinge of guilt and affection both ripples in his stomach.
"It's been tough, but..." Donna nods as her eyes rims with moisture, "But at the very least, I could keep a close watch on you, and oversee your emotional progress... And Adam, I know it was hard on you. It's barely excusable to turn you into a stranger to your own livelihood. And I can't tell you how heart-wrenching it's been to sit here, day after day, pretending that you're not my son." She huffs a small whimper as she dabs her eyes again.
"And I know, just from talking to you, how alone and deprived you must feel... But honestly, I hardly know just what's safe for you to know anymore. I don't know just what might make your head explode all over again."
"You're really her. You're really my Mom...?" Adam asks her.
"Just one step... Just one wrong move... Anything Jamal, your Dad, Yuri... Any of your close friends might say that would make your head hurt to a blinding degree... I felt like I had to hide you from the rest of the world... After your incident..."
"What happened to me?" Adam asked her, "How and why did I get into the hospital in the first place?"
Donna sniffs and holds back a sob as she looks at him, "You were bashed, Adam. You had experienced blood poisoning, massive head trauma, so many broken bones..." She says, shaking and bowing her head, "And the reason is so heartbreakingly simple, it just drives me mad with sorrow..."
"A-And then, you couldn't remember me." She goes on, "You couldn't remember anyone... Not me, not your father, not Yuri, Jamal, Merrick, any of your coworkers or friends..." Donna huffs and sniffs a little.
"But you need to know that you are never alone." She shook her head, "You have so many people waiting for you to get better. All of them are waiting for you to come back. People you love, people who love you."
"And also, I need you to understand, Adam." Donna finally glances at his face with wet eyes, "For a parent to almost lose their child, and then having no grasp of what stability they can handle... It's hard... Especially when they look you in the eyes, and asks you, 'Who are you?'. As a parent, I can't begin to describe how much it destroyed me and your father when you woke up, and didn't have a clue of who we are..."
Adam is overwhelmed as he looks at her, feeling himself a little restless and emotional himself. She wipes her eyes with a small cloth as she glances at him once or twice. Now she seems almost too afraid to look at him now... He doesn't like this.
"... Adam, please say something..." She tells him, "I can't take it, please... Just, if you feel angry at me, or anything, just go ahead and... Just say something, please..."
Adam holds his arms in an angle as his hands twitch at little, hesitantly gesturing, "... I-I wanna hug you... Mo-Mom."
Donna scoffs in emotion as he really does seem like a sad, lost little boy. "I-I-Is that ok?" His voice shakes a little, "I-I don't know to do, and... A-Am I allowed?"
"Yes, yes, you can Adam, come here. It's ok." She walks around the end of his bed, and comes to him. Adam steps up, and puts his arms around her. He sniffles as he squeezes her tight, as well as hearing her sob quietly.
"I wanted to meet you for so long..." Adam muttered quietly, "I had no idea who anyone is, Mom..." He whined quietly.
"I know. I'm sorry, Adam..."
They hold each other for about a minute, rocking back forth while keeping their emotions on the level.
"... Does this mean I can know more about my life now?" Adam asked, "Can I... Can I at least go home?"