Wild Card Weekend
Vince Lombardi, one of the NFL's greatest coaches, had said, "It is essential to understand that battles are primarily won in the hearts of men. Men respond to leadership in a most remarkable way and once you have won his heart, he will follow you anywhere." I hadn't fully realized the veracity of this statement until I experienced it for myself during the recent NFL Playoffs.
---Saturday
I headed over to my neighbor Ben's place to catch the first round of NFL Playoff games with him and a couple of his friends. I had met Ben at an association meeting for our building back at the beginning of the Pro Season and we hit it off right away. Within a couple of weeks, he convinced me switch to his gym so that we could work out together, which was beneficial for us both in terms of motivation and adherence to an exercise regimen. Our friendship evolved rather easily over the next few months, culminating to the point of either seeing each other, talking over the phone, or texting one another nearly every day. One of the most remarkable things about Ben is that he's the kind of guy that somehow manages to get along with everyone; it's a rare occasion when we go out in the neighborhood and he doesn't run into someone he knows. He's a lot of fun to be around because he has a great sense of humor and a genuine, affable manner. Like me, Ben is single, which is surprising because he's a real charming, good-looking guy. I'd say he's about 6' or so, enviably built with curly, dark blonde hair and blue eyes.
His buddies Erik and Joe were already at his place by the time I arrived for the first game, so I quickly grabbed a beer and joined them in discussing the merits of this year's teams. Apparently, Ben and Joe have been betting on the games for a few years now, initially for cash but had switched to doing 'favors' for each other, such as washing the winner's car or doing household repairs. Joe was obviously not fond of that kind of arrangement. "I'm not fixing any of your shit anymore," he grumbled and then listed his various chores from the previous year. "Your goddam Jacuzzi tub, your furnace, your fucking washing machine. Jesus, I even had to detail your car."
"Well," Ben replied, chuckling. "That's part of the fun of betting. It raises the stakes."
Joe shook his head in response. "Let's just do something quick and be done with it."
"I just don't think a cash prize is all that rewarding, really," Ben countered. "We need something that properly recognizes the dominance of the winner."
Joe smiled and regarded Ben for a moment. "I'm afraid to even
think
of what you might suggest."
"Oh, I'll come up with something," Ben said with a wink. "Just wait and see."
As the first game between Dallas and Seattle got underway, Ben sidled up next to me on the couch and draped his arm around my shoulders. "You know, the Cowboys haven't been doing too good this year."
"And yet here they are in the Playoffs," I refuted.
"As one of the wild cards," he clarified.
"It's all good," I replied, sipping my beer. "The Cowboys are gonna kick ass!"
Ben chuckled and reached for his own beer. "Todd, the only thing your Cowboys are gonna do with ass today is suck it!"
I shook my head as Joe and Erik backed him up with whoops and hollers. "You know, you can kiss my ass when they embarrass your Seahawks," I told him good-naturedly.
"Gladly," Ben replied with an indifferent shrug. "But when the Cowboys lose, you're gonna have to kiss
my
ass."
I laughed as he smiled at me. "Oh, I'm not worried," I told him in an attempt to surpass his conviction. "They're not gonna lose."
"Yeah, keep believing that, buddy," he taunted amicably and then turned to Erik and Joe. "Well, gentlemen, it looks like we have our first wager."
Joe emphatically shook his head. "No, that's between the two of you," he asserted. "Count me out."
The Seahawks scored the first touchdown, followed by another in the second quarter. By halftime, the Seahawks were ahead, 13 -- 7.
"Do you want some ChapStick or anything?" Ben asked me. "Because I really don't want anything rough on my ass."
"Don't get cocky," I cautioned calmly. "We still have the second half to go."
The Cowboys scored in the third quarter and managed a 30-yard field goal in the fourth, which effectively put them ahead. I was able to gloat a bit until the Seahawks scored again in the final few minutes, ending the game, 20 -- 17.
Once the clock ran out, Ben rose to his feet, clapping loudly. "Yeah, pucker up, buddy! Your Cowboys lost!" He slipped his thumbs into the waistband of his gym shorts and flashed me a wide grin. "You're going to enjoy this ... my butt is in pristine condition." He turned around and pushed his shorts down, exposing his smooth, round backside to view. I groaned aloud and buried my face in my hands. "Aw, don't be a sore loser," he cajoled. "A bet's a bet."
I muttered a protest and glanced over at Joe and Erik who only shrugged in return.
I heaved a sigh and I stared at his bare ass for a brief moment. "I'll get you back for this, you know that, right?"
"Okay, your lips are forming words right now, when they should be puckered and on my butt."
I grumbled and then leaned forward, placing my hands on his hips. I hesitated briefly before quickly kissing his right cheek and then slapping his left one. Ben whistled and pulled up his shorts while Erik applauded loudly.
"You guys are fucked up," Joe said, chuckling in spite of himself.
There weren't any other wagers during the second game since everyone was rooting for the Broncos, Ben's favorite team. The Broncos didn't disappoint, beating the Colts, 31 -- 12.
On the way to the door, Ben gave me a playful pat on the butt. "You're a good sport, buddy," he told me. "I appreciate that."
"Don't think I won't get you back," I warned him.
He flashed a bright smile and gave me a wink. "Lookin' forward to it."
---Sunday
I went over to Ben's place a little early the next day to catch some of the pre-game coverage. Joe arrived shortly after me and we sat and talked while Ben got on the phone to his parents.
Ben and Joe have been friends ever since high school where they played varsity football together. Joe went to college out-of-state but eventually moved back home a few years later and they quickly resumed their friendship. Joe's a little bit shorter than Ben and is a lean, wiry guy with an olive complexion and thick black hair that's beginning to recede a bit. He can be somewhat aloof and reserved initially but is pretty cool once he warms up. Although there is an obvious air of competitiveness between the two of them, you can tell that they treat each other as brothers.
Erik arrived shortly before kickoff with sandwiches and beer. As we all settled in, Ben began proselytizing at length about the superiority of the Dolphins over the Patriots. Yet once the game was underway, to Ben's chagrin, the Patriots quickly proved their skill and, by halftime, were ahead 21 -- 0.
"You're Dolphins are losing," Joe chastised Ben pointedly.
Ben simply shrugged in response, popping a handful of peanuts into his mouth. "Don't you worry, Joe, they'll catch up."
Towards the end of the third quarter, Miami managed to score once but were still significantly behind.
"How does your foot taste, Ben?" Joe asked. "You're not gagging on it, are you?"
"I never gag," Ben replied, "on anything."
"Aw, man, I should have bet you on this one," I groused, feeling that I had missed my opportunity to get back at him for yesterday.
"It's not too late," Ben said, nudging my leg with his knee. "There are still a few minutes left in the third and the whole fourth to go. Why not make it interesting?"
"What do you suggest?" I asked.
"His foot
literally
in his own mouth," Joe proposed, chuckling to himself.
Ben shook his head dismissively and then turned back to me. "You got any better ideas?"