Are You Lonely?

My fantasies grow stranger and more erotic every day and David has become the central figure in my masturbatory illusions.

Take for example what I dreamed about once I arrived home from the grocery store.

He greeted me in the hallway as I was opening the door to my boy-cave. His body was glistening with sweat so I knew he'd come from his workout.

To my delight I saw he was carrying a glass full of my favorite green beverage. I invited him inside.

Once I set my purchases on the kitchen counter I took the absinthe from him and drank it so quickly my head began to spin the very moment the glass was empty.

I really need to learn how to pace myself when I drink that stuff. Every time so far, once I feel the pleasant warmness in my belly my mind drifts-off to a faraway paradise. That is when my dreams and fantasies begin. It was no different this time with David.

I fantasize I am standing in my own apartment staring into David's hypnotic, brown eyes.

He asks me, "Are you lonely?"

I answer, "I am never lonely when I'm with you."

I immediately go to him and he holds me tight and we kiss and my prick instantly stiffens. When our tongues dance together the now-familiar thick fog and haze of lust and desire envelopes my mind.

I imagine our conversation goes something like this:

He asks about the dark, wet splotches showing thru my jeans. I cannot lie to him. I confess I had masturbated inside the car in the parking lot of the grocery store.

He smiles and says, "Good boy."

Another kiss; our tongues lock together. My head swoons and my erection throbs.

"Get naked," he says.

I smile and say, "Yes, darling."

Oh, that's a new twist. I'd never called him 'darling' in my dreams before.

He is amused when he sees dried and drying sperm and semen on my crotch and legs.

"You look and smell like an Afghani dancing boy," he says.

I have no idea what he means, but know it is a compliment from the wide smile on his handsome face.

He pushes his shorts down to the floor. I stare at his beautiful erection. He cups his scrotum showing it to me.

"Get on your knees and lick the sweat off my balls," he says.

I sigh as my brain is awash with the euphoric lightheadedness I have come to love.

"Yes, darling," I say to him and drop to my knees.

I immediately bury my face in his crotch and inhale the musky, manly aroma that makes my prick throb, my balls swell, and sends my brain into a foggy paradise.

There is something I know I have to ask him but I can't remember what it is. I move closer to his crotch and stick out my tongue but he stops me with his hand on my forehead.

I groan in frustration but suddenly remember the words I must say.

"May I please lick the sweat off your balls, darling?" I ask him.

"Yes you may, my pretty little boyfriend," I hear him say above me.

**

I am soaking in the hot bubble bath. David had told me how much I would love soaking in the soapy hot water and he was right. I have come to learn that David is right about everything he tells me.

I sit back and close my eyes. My tongue licks the saltiness from the roof of my mouth. There is that strange taste again. What is that?

All I know is I am not to drink anything until I get to David's later on. The taste will be on my tongue for a couple more hours.

I know I had recently masturbated because of the sweet, aching sensation in my groin.

I allow my mind to drift back to my latest masturbatory fantasy.

My arms are resting on the kitchen counter. I am leaning forward. I am naked. My legs are spread open and my hips are thrust backwards.

David places a fingertip to my lips and says, "Make my finger wet."

I gather as much saliva as I can and coat the entire digit until it is glistening wet.

I feel his hand on my buttocks. His hand opens my cheeks and I feel a wet finger massaging the opening of what he calls, my boypussy.

Oh my gosh, he's going to push it inside me. My prick becomes hard as a rock.

He takes his time. He pushes his finger into me a quarter-of-an-inch at a time. He let's me get accustomed to the strange invasion of my boypussy.

I instinctively clench my sphincter muscle but he pinches an asscheek, hard, and tells me to relax.

I take a deep breath as I see explosive fireworks in my head. Once I feel the palm of his hand flat on my ass I know his finger is all the way inside me.

He keeps his finger still for twenty-thirty seconds then begins to slowly withdraw it until just the tip is inside me.

This time he pushes it harder into me and involuntary spasms of pleasure begin to wrack my body.

He moves it faster and faster in-and-out of my boypussy. I suddenly feel the nylon shorts wrapped around my erection. He strokes my prick in time with his thrusting finger.

"Push back harder," I hear him say. "Imagine my hard cock is fucking your boypussy."

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...." I groan at the mention of his hard cock.

Yesss, God-yessssss...I can clearly see in my minds-eye him standing behind me ramming his hard cock into me.

"When you cum in your shorts it's going to be the best climax you've ever had," he says to me as he rapidly frigs my prick.

My head is rolling side-to-side. My eyeballs screw upward in the sockets. He says something to me and I respond with "Yes, darling."

My swollen balls suddenly rise. My back arches off the counter. My head explodes. I am in the grips of wave-after-wave-after-wave of excruciating ecstasy.

I shout, "I'M-CUMMING-DARLING---I'M-CUMMING-DARLING---I'M-CUMMING-DARLING---I'M-CUMMING-I'M-CUMMING-OH-GOD-I'M-CUMMING-I'M-CUMMING-I'M-CUMMING-I'M-CUMMING-I'M-CUMMINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG...."

My eyes pop open. The sudsy warm water feels wonderful. My fantasy caused me to spring another boner. I automatically reach for it but suddenly stop.

I hear a voice admonishing, "Do not masturbate this afternoon...you must have an erection when you cross the hallway at 4 o'clock."

I knew I had to obey the voice. It takes every ounce of willpower I have to keep my hand off my prick.

I sigh and close my eyes again. My mind is filled with swirling images of hard cocks and homosexual thoughts and dreams.

I am no longer the boy who I thought I was. I feel slightly uneasy about the boy I have become but those negative thoughts quickly fade as my mind is again filled with images of handsome men with their hard and virile cocks jutting straight out from their manly crotches.

As David would say, "It is what it is."

**

At 3:55 I slip out of my cotton briefs then pull the tiny lavender gym shorts up into place. As usual, the nylon material causes my prick to stiffen.

I sit at the computer and refresh the screen. The images of naked men and boys suddenly appear again. It takes all my willpower to not squeeze my erection thru the shorts.

Gazing at the manly bodies, some glistening with perspiration, I allow myself to fantasize about the men and what I wanted to do for them.

I glance at the time on the lower right of the screen -- 3:59 - and leap up from the chair.

Before I go into the hallway I tug the nylon material from between the crack of my butt, take a deep breath then walk out the door.

I literally bump into a boy about my age wearing black gym shorts as tiny as mine. He has no other clothes on. Next to him is an older man in swim trunks with a wet towel draped over his shoulder. They were obviously coming from the pool.

The man looks me up and down and smiles. "You must be David's new boy, Joanie," he says. "My-my, you are a little cutie aren't you!"

I want to correct him and say my name is John, but I remain quiet. I am aware of his eyes locked onto my erection tenting-out the shorts.

I find it odd he doesn't offer his hand for me to shake, or even tell me his name. He slowly, and quite openly looks me up and down again and smacks his lips.

"Yes, maybe in a week or so we'll have you and David over for dinner..." he says.

He turns to the boy and asks him, "Skippy, wouldn't you like to get to know Joanie better? I'd love to watch you two together!"

The boy himself has the same hungry look in his eyes as the old guy.

"Oh yes, sir...I have a feeling Joanie and I would put on a pretty good show for you!" he said smiling while staring at my crotch.

Instead of being upset over the blatant sexuality of their comments, I listened to the way they pronounced my name. Their accents weren't as thick as David's so it sounded to me they intentionally were saying 'Joanie' and not 'Johnny'. Oh well, it is what it is....

**

Once inside his apartment, David too looked me up and down and said, "You are so beautiful you take my breath away, Joanie."

I blush but definitely love the compliment.

"Give me a hug, cutie," he says and before I can react I find myself in his arms.

I am overcome with a warm glow and place my arms around him and hold him tightly.

I don't know why I thought of this, but I was strangely disappointed he didn't have an erection when our bodies came together.

He broke the hug and said, "I opened a bottle of wine for myself, and the absinthe is next to it...go pour us drinks, Joanie."

"Oh, okay," I said then added, "yes,sir."

I poured David a glass of red wine then filled my glass with ice and poured absinthe to the very top. I glanced behind me and saw that David couldn't see me from the living room so I took two very large swallows of the absinthe then re-filled the glass again.

The burning sensation of the liquor flowing down into my belly turned quickly to the warmth I was now accustomed to.

I gave David his glass and sat close beside him on the sofa. He moved even closer until our legs were touching. I enjoyed feeling his flesh on mine.

"So what do you think of living here so far?" he asked me. "Do you like it?"

"I love it here," I said, "...but, uh, I've, uh...."

"Joanie, look at me," he said.

I shyly stared into his rich, brown eyes.

"I've grown very close to you in a short period of time...I think you feel close to me, too...I trust you enough to say whatever comes into my mind and I hope you feel the same trust for me," he said softly.

Two more swallows of the drink and the pleasant, mellow glow returned to my head. I relaxed. I loved the way the liquor released me from my inhibitions.

"I do trust you," I said then took two more big swallows, "but it's kind of embarrassing...."

He smiled and said, "It might help if you finish your drink and pour yourself another one."

So I did as I was told.

By the time I sat down again I felt absolutely no qualms talking about myself.

"It seems like since I moved here I've been, uh, well---"

"Go ahead, sweetie, you can tell me," he said.

Oh my goodness -- he called me 'sweetie' -- I love it!

I averted my eyes from his and said, "I've been, uh, masturbating so much I don't know what's wrong with me."

He chuckled good-naturedly and said, "There is nothing wrong with that, sweetie...a boy like you needs to find release quite often...why do you find that so upsetting?"

"Well, I, uh...I've grown kind of addicted to using my gym shorts to, uh, you know...." I said softly.

"You love to jerk-off into your shorts -- there's nothing wrong with that either...you've found out something about yourself," he said.

"What's that?" I ask him.

"You have a nylon fetish...a lot of boys like you love the feel of a soft and smooth fabric wrapped around their dicks -- it's perfectly normal," he said.

"Oh good...I guess."

"Joanie, you are young and full of cum...it would be strange if you didn't jack-off every day...so, what do you fantasize about while you're doing it? You do fantasize, right?"

"Well, yeah, but...uh, that's the strange part, too."

"Why is it strange? Do you fantasize about goats and sheep?"

We both laugh.

"No, nothing like that...it's just, well...."

"Joanie, you can tell me anything, remember?"

"I've been thinking about men lately...."

"And you find that disturbing, why?"

"Because I'm not gay...at least I never thought of myself as gay."

"And you find that disturbing, why?"

"Well, uh, I don't know...."

"Allow me to tell you about my travels in the Middle East...I do a lot of business there and have many Arab men as friends and clients...let me tell you a little about their culture -- homosexuality is strictly forbidden -- in some countries you can be executed if they think you're queer..."

"Well, that's wrong."

"Of course it's wrong...do you know the best estimate by scientists is that up to 10% of the human population is gay? Anyway, many men in Arab countries have sex with boys but don't believe it's a homosexual act."

"How can that be?"

"They have a saying: 'Women are for procreation -- boys are for recreation!'...they believe if you have sex with another male strictly for the sex -- it's not gay...it is only gay if you fall in love with another man."

"Isn't that just a rationalization so they can justify having sex with boys?"

"Sure it is but you know, there might be something to that belief...I can assure you men, and especially young men are the same worldwide -- their dicks get hard at the slightest sexy thought, or hell, if the wind blows in a certain direction..."

We both laugh.

"Well, uh, yes, I guess so...."

"What I mean is that we are conditioned at an early age to think of two men, or two women having sex as unnatural and morally wrong...."

"That's true."

"Well then let me ask you one question -- why? Why is it wrong?"

"Well, uh, you know, it's in the bible."

"'Thou shall not lie with mankind as with womankind: it is an abomination'...the book of Leviticus in the old Testament...."

"Exactly."

"Who wrote that? God didn't write it -- Jesus didn't write it -- a man wrote it -- a human being wrote it...that was his opinion..."

"I guess so...."

"Let me go in a different direction here...it's fairly common for many boys and young men to 'experiment' with sex with a friend, or maybe even a stranger...do you agree?"

"Yeah, I've read that...."

"Why do they 'experiment'?"

"I dunno, maybe to find out if they're gay or not...."

"Could be...but couldn't it be as simple as it feels good? Which do you prefer: your hand on your dick, or someone else's hand -- or mouth on your dick?"

"Well, yeah...someone else's...."

"Many men, on occasion, have brought another guy off, or had it done to them...is that a wrong thing to do? Is that even an issue of morality?"

"Not really..."

"No, it's simply an act of lust - helping out a friend in time of need...religious nuts made it a moral issue...most men are hard-wired to want sex with women only...but to many of us who are not inhibited about how we get our release, well, there is a saying: a warm mouth is a warm mouth!"

I was silent as I contemplated his words. I'm not a religious person and deep down I don't care if two guys bring each other off...I understand touching another guys cock doesn't necessarily mean you're gay, but the feelings I was now experiencing for David were another matter altogether.

**

"Joanie, pour us two more before dinner," he said as he gave me his glass.

My head was already spinning, and it took some effort to stand, but I managed the task successfully.

"The other night at the bar you mentioned you're a photographer...what kind of business takes you to the Middle East?" I asked David when I was seated again.

"I have specially designed websites for different countries and cultures that brings in considerable monies...but the real profit center are 'personal request' photo shoots and short videos," he explained.

"It sounds complicated," I said.

"It's not...it would be easier to explain if we go into my studio," he said.

"You have a studio in your apartment?" I asked.

"I converted the master bedroom into the studio, it's much larger than the second bedroom where I sleep. Would you like to see it?" he asked.

"Oh, uh, sure," I answered.

David helped me stand. I was thrilled when he took me by the hand and we walked side-by-side to the studio.

David flipped a switch and the room was awash in bright light. On the right-side was a large bed with black sheets. The wallpaper was a rather tacky dark burgundy, the kind you might see on the back bar in an old western movie. A loveseat across from the bed seemed to be of the same material.

I walked to the bed and felt the sheets -- is that silk or satin? Either way, the smooth and sensuous touch caused my hard-on to throb against the nylon of my shorts.

"Joanie," called out David, "place your hands on your hips and give me a big smile!"

I turned to see him aiming a camera at me. I gave him the best smile I could. I am usually very uncomfortable when a camera is pointing at me, but the absinthe was working marvelously. I was so relaxed my smile was genuine and not forced.

"Good, very good...now turn sideways for me...yes, good...now lay on the bed on your back...perfect, you look so relaxed."

My goodness, the satin sheets felt so good on my bare flesh my prick seemed to throb inside the shorts without even being touched.

"Lay on your side...rest your head on your hand...give me a smaller smile -- a come hither-like smile...oh yes, you look so sexy you're giving me a hard-on!"

My goodness, did he just say what I thought he said?

"Get on all-fours near the end of the bed...good...now turn your neck around so you can look at me...nice....very sexy!"

The whole 'photo shoot' took only ten-minutes. I was not only relaxed, but also feeling hornier than heck. I was consciously aware of my hard prick tenting out the crotch of the nylon shorts and it took every ounce of self control to not reach down and stroke it thru the shorts.

"Good boy," he said when he placed the camera next to his computer. "Go to the kitchen and fill our bowls with the beef stew on the stove. I'll be there in a few minutes."

"Yes, David," I replied.

It seemed longer than five-minutes before he was seated next to me at the table. I had poured him another glass of wine and had taken the liberty to re-fill my glass with the magic green liquor.

He made small talk while we ate. He was the most fascinating man I'd ever met even discussing trivial matters.

After dinner, when I was standing at the sink washing the dishes he suddenly placed his arms around me.

When I felt his hands massaging my breasts and pinching my nipples I thought I was going to cum in my shorts.

I felt his hot breath in my ear.

"Joanie, you wouldn't believe the responses I've already received from your photos!" he whispered.

I was confused.

"Responses?" I asked him. "Responses from who?"

"My special clients...I always send them photos of fresh new boys after a shoot," he explained. "I hope you don't mind...I couldn't resist sending them yours...you are the prettiest boy I've had in the studio in a long time!"

I loved his compliment. I was flush with excitement.

"Some of them want to see more of you...have even made 'personal requests'..." he said.

"What do you mean 'more of me'?" I asked.

"They want to see you naked."

That's what I thought he meant.

"...and playing with yourself," he added.

Oh my goodness...even in my mellow state of mind I blushed.

"Joanie, none of my photos or videos are available in this country...there is absolutely no chance of anyone you know seeing them," he said.

"Well, uh, that's good to know but that's really not the problem...it's just that, uh..." I stammered. "The problem are the bright lights and a camera focused on me, you know, 'down there'..."

"So your objections are not based on any moral issues. You would simply be too self conscious to pose for me that way. Is that it?" he asked.

"Well, yeah...I don't think I could, you know, show them what they want to see," I said.