So there I was at my first ballet class. I was very nervous and made it clear to people, even if they didn't' ask, that I was straight. I wanted to wear tights but I wore sweats the first time and a dance belt because I was too self conscious, but I soon found two things -- I genuinely enjoyed the class and the discipline of ballet, and even though it was a 'beginner' class, it was at a serious New York dance studio and people took it seriously.
Occasionally advanced level and pro dancers came in for refreshers. The class was mostly women but there were plenty of men, and out of respect the high level of tradition and craft in the class instructor most of the men wore tights of some kind. I learned later it was vital to see the correct positioning of the knees.
After a few classes, I felt comfortable enough to wear tights and not sweats. I was nervous but I also felt so alive and comfortable in them. The first time I walked in wearing tights, I felt a wave of fear at the door, but once there I realized it was perfectly 'normal' to dress like this for class, and the teacher even said it was good that I was wearing them. Soon ballet class became my favorite place. Its hard to explain but the tights were beyond sexual it felt sensual to wear them a heightened, ideal existence, like a ballet performance, a magical world, separated from the drudgery of every day.
I was super comfortable talking to the women and the guys in the class. I tried to sneak looks at the women, but out of respect for class mates and the class, I never ogled or stared. But the 'cure' wasn't working, my sex fantasies were still about men, though I didn't look at any of the men class.
That all changed the day a dancer walked in. He looked very much like the male dancer in the magazine that I found so alluring, and although I was convinced I was straight, even just looking at him my heart dropped and my mouth went dry. He was wearing a close fitting white t shirt and black tights. He walked by and took a barre position in front or me. I tried not to look but when I finally looked at his ass I couldn't help myself, feelings of wanting to touch him raced through me. I couldn't stop thinking about him after class and for the first time I didn't only just have sexual fantasies about men, I had romantic ones as well.
At this point, I was worried that I might have gay feelings. I was still repressing and rationalizing, but the feelings kept growing and growing and I found myself eagerly anticipating my next class. But I kept telling myself it was for the women. Even so, I began to allow myself to look at some of the other guys, and I realized while I found the women's bodies sensual and beautiful, a guy in tights made me weak kneed and lustful.
After a couple of classes, I usually smile and say hi to the 'regulars' and when I said hi he smiled and introduced himself. Our eyes lingered on each other a little longer than usual and butterflies filled my stomach.
"Hi I am Tim", he said.
I told him my name and we chatted a little about ballet. It turned out he studied pretty seriously when he was younger, but switched majors in college and now was working at a pretty good job but missed ballet and wanted to get back into it.
I told him I admired that, I wish I had the guts to take it when I was younger, and now that I took it I loved everything about it.
"I love the discipline and tradition", I said.
"Me too", he replied, "I love that in this class the men and women wear tights."
"Yeah", I replied, "I am surprised how good they feel. I feel better about myself when I am in them."
"Did I just say that!", I said to myself. But he responded with a smile and agreed.
That night I got home and I realized I had strong feelings for him both sexual and romantic. But still I wasn't 'ready' to face my sexuality. I still tried to flirt with girls in the class, but they all felt like friends and I didn't feel anything for them.
One day Tim came in and as he placed his bag by the window, I noticed one of his ballet slippers was untied. Without thinking I seized on the chance.
"Your slipper's untied, here let me fix it", I said as I knelt down and tied it.
My hands shook as my fingers touched his leather ballet slipper. I could feel the warmth of his body near me and the smell of the nylon and his leather slippers. I tied them up, somehow managing despite my racing heart and butterfly filled stomach. I got up and he looked at me, smiling and thanking me. His eyes lingered a little more and I looked at him and smiled until the spell was broken by the teacher announcing the beginning of class. Thankfully, I was wearing a dance belt because I had a throbbing hardon and was worried that even the movement of a plie might cause me to cum.
From that day on, a mounting desire built in me. Our conversations grew longer and longer and we'd often physically glide by each other almost touching sometimes a hand brushing against the other's body.
I would often ask him tips about ballet and sometimes he'd physically correct me like the teacher did and once I thought his hand lingered just a bit longer on my leg than the correction required.
Then one day, he wasn't at class. And the next class. My heart dropped and I thought he was gone for good. I couldn't hide my enthusiasm when he appeared in class again. I ran over with a big smile and told him how I missed him and how good it was to see him. He said he missed hanging out with me too, but he had been busy at work.
"Let's make sure we don't lose contact again", I blurted out.
And he replied by asking me out for a drink after class. He mentioned there was a quiet bar nearby. Funny as it sounds I was still worried about being gay but quickly thought It didn't imply I was gay and though I was nervous I thought 'why not" and said yes.
We both didn't want to change because it would take to long and class was on a weeknight so we both decided to just slip on pants over our tights and go to the bar.
